Bleach does not belong to me T.T

Contains spoilers up to manga chapter 281

It was feeding time in Hueco Mundo and Ulquiorra drifted silently thought Las Notches

followed by the not so silent servant arrancar with the cart of food. Ulquiorra hated this job, the woman was always either yelling, sulking or even worse slapping him, and most of the time he had to shove food down her throat so she would not starve to death. He sighed inwardly as he and the servant neared her door.

"Woman I'm coming in" he said in his monotonous way and opened the door. What he saw made him sweat drop and almost gape at the scene. Almost.

There on the couch sat the woman, Orihime, with a very relaxed looking Grimmjow in his released form lying on the couch with his head in her lap. What was worse is that she was stroking Grimmjow on the head and he purred in reply.

"Woman what is this?" Ulquiorra asked trying to keep his calm look.

Orihime looked up and smiled brightly at him "Hi Ulqu-kun! Did you know Grimm-kun was a kitty! He is so cute and awesome and fluffy and…" she continued blabbing about how cute Grimmjow was unknowing that Ulquiorra was sweat dropping a waterfall now.

"Woman I shall ask you again what is this?" he interrupted her continuous muttering.

"It's Cat Therapy!" she chimed happily while stroking the now apparently sleeping Grimmjow even faster "did you know it relives stress and is believed to help people heal! And all you have to do is pet a cat!"

Ulquiorra sighed and looked over at the food cart. The servant arrancar wasn't there anymore probably too scared to stay in case of a fight, so he pushed the cart inside himself.

"Woman I'll be back in an hour. I expect you to eat by then and him" his voice indicating Grimmjow "gone." Having said all he needed to Ulquiorra closed the door and walked away leaving Orihime and Grimmjow alone.

As soon as his footsteps and reatsu were far away Grimmjow sat up and sighed in relief.

"Can't believe he bought that!" he said his release form disappearing and reforming back into his Zanpaku-to.

"Yeah I was sure he was going to catch us!" She said apparently surprised at Ulquiorras actions.

"Now where were we...?" Grimmjow leaned kissing her on the neck

"Grimmjow! What if he comes back!"

"Nahh the fag said he'll be back in an hour and that's long enough for a quickie. Don't ya think?"

This was an idea that poped into my head today

Ahh those crafty little lovers

I think that Ulqu already knew and just didn't want a head ache that he would get from Grimms yelling