Lesson #254- Unforgettable
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. I have just kidnapped Severus and Harry for a while.
It was a perfectly peaceful Thursday afternoon in downtown muggle London; people went about their normal everyday business unaware of the argument between the two wizards in their midst.
"I said no."
"Severus Archimedes Snape You WILL accompany me to my ballet class this afternoon or else."
Potions Professor Severus Snape stopped his hurried strides and turned to face the petite man. "Or else what?" he challenged
Harry Jameson Potter-Snape, savior of the Wizarding world, met his husband's challenging gaze with a glare of his own. "Or else no sex…" Severus smirked, he could live with that "…for the next four months."
Severus blanched "WHAT, you cannot do that!"
"Well Sev," Harry replied calmly, "I do have the power to claim abstinence for a while and I plan on using it to its full potential so you had better learn quickly or get used to being celibate once again."
Severus said nothing but settled on scowling. He knew that there was nothing that he can do; Harry had him wrapped around his little finger and- like the Slytherin he nearly was - planned on utilizing his power to his own advantage.
"Now, now Severus," Harry cooed seriously, "My class is in a few minutes and I can't leave you alone in the apartment with out any supervision. You remember the last time that happened."
Shockwaves ran throughout the whole building due to the force of the explosion. Harry glanced upwards towards their window.
"I hope that was not our apartment." He murmured before getting into the lift.
"Harry, something happened to the BV!" was the cry that greeted him when he opened the door.
"I knew it." He sighed shaking his head in resignation.
Placing the groceries on the kitchen table he wandered into the living room where Severus was trying to resuscitate the television using CPR. Everything else in the room was in shambles. Harry gazed at the destruction in disbelief. 'I was only out for two minutes,' he thought 'How could he do this in that short amount of time?'
Severus shivered, oh yes did he remember.
"That doesn't mean I have to like it" he sulked.
"No it doesn't," Harry replied "but I promise you will anyway; you get to see me in Lycra."
Severus perked up at that.
It was another ten minutes before they reached the academy. Harry led the reluctant man up the stairs and directed him into the studio.
"Stay here." He ordered "I need to go change first; Don't. Go. Anywhere."
"I'm not an idiot Potter; I will not venture out of this room." Severus grumbled.
Harry gave him a peck on the cheek and skipped out the room; a shout of "that's Potter-Snape!" came floating back behind him.
Fifteen minutes later with no sign of Harry ever returning Severus was scowling with all his might. What could be taking so long? Impatience overoad Harry's instructions and he wandered out into the lobby in search of his wayward husband. The sound of music greeted his ears and Severus looked through the window into the next room. Inside were at least 80 women, of all ages and size. They were all giggling and chatting to each other as tights went flying across the room and shoes were handed around. Guessing it was the change room and deciding to look for Harry himself he pushed the door open and entered. For a minute there was absolute silence as each woman stared at him in distinct horror and Severus stared at them back before the screaming began.
"Creep!" "Peeping tom!" "Pervert!" was the cry that assaulted his ears as he was attacked with various items from around the room. Severus quickly exited the room screeching in fear as the hoard of angry women followed him out. He raced into the next room; slamming the door as the mob ran passed. With hands pressed to the door, he paused to catch his breath. When he was recomposed he turned to face… a class of four year olds.
"Are you our teacher?" one of the children, a red headed little boy, asked.
Severus sniffed indignantly "No I am not your teacher, you pitiful fools."
Now obviously no one had informed Severus how temperamental children were and that it was best to keep them as calm as possible because they were all wailing in minutes.
"YOU ARE A MEANIE!" they cried as one in perfect unison
Severus covered his ears as he was once again assaulted with raised voices; his sensitive hearing not helping the situation at all. "Shut Up you little monsters!" he roared in frustration.
The children abruptly kept quiet and Severus lowered his hands to revel in the blissful silence. What he didn't expect however was to be faced with 25 very angry toddlers. The red headed boy who had inquired if he was their teacher walked up to him and kicked him in the shins; Hard. Severus yelped in pain.
"You are a super meanie mister and we don't like you!" he said. Many heads nodded in agreement.
Severus glared at the brats in front of him "I am Severus Snape, Potions Master. You will not talk to me like that."
The class all shared a glance before they launched an attack, screaming all the while. Severus stared at them in disdain before he reopened the door and fled, the four year olds close behind. The noise attracted the angry ballerinas and they rejoined the chase also issuing battle cries. Severus figured he ran up two flights of stairs and down at least five corridors before he was trapped at a dead end. The crowd drew closer to his person and he shrank back in fear and apprehension before he felt the familiar poke of his wand. He straightened and started laughing.
"Ha, Ha, Ha you are all mere muggles, I am a wizard and therefore superior. I will not be harmed by the likes of you!"
Apparently this was the wrong thing to say because mob closed in on him faster than flies flew to honey. Severus began his screaming a fresh as he was mauled and bitten. The group slowly began moving as one to the entrance of the studio and exited the building taking the screaming, hysterical potions master with them.
"Thanks again Dave, I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't had a spare leotard." Harry said as he exited the men's change room with one of his dance friends.
"No problem Jamie, I was only too happy to help." Dave replied "Now shouldn't you be getting to that husband of yours; from what you've told me about him he isn't the type you want to leave in a room without nothing to do for too long. By the way why do you need the 'tard, your class has been canceled for today? "
"What, why wasn't I informed?!" Harry demanded coming to a stop
"Ask you're husband; he's the one I left the message with." Dave replied shrugging his shoulders
"I'll do that Dave, thank you again." Harry said stalking to the studio, intent on giving Severus a piece of his mind; however when he entered he found it empty. Pursing his lips in annoyance and putting his hands on his hips he surveyed the room. 'I knew it' he thought very irritated. 'Does that man ever listen to my instructions?'
Picking up the discarded duffle Harry headed out of the building not even bothering to look for his husband. 'Let him find his own way home' he thought angrily. 'He's a grown man after all. He can take care of himself'
It was eleven o' clock that evening, when Harry was in bed reading his copy of Return of the king that the doorbell rang; repeatedly. Sighing in frustration he marked his page and placed the book on the bedside table. Putting on his robe he headed to open the door where he saw Cindy Alperton, one of the ballerinas he danced with.
"Cindy!" he exclaimed "What are you doing here?"
"I believe this belongs to you." She said as a dirty, ragged and torn Severus entered the apartment. As he passed by Harry saw that he had various minor injuries on his person as well as many different sized bruises. Harry tried hard not to laugh as he turned back to his dance mate.
"Thank you for bringing him home Cindy." He said to the woman in front of him.
"It was no problem Jamie, just tell him that the next time he feels the need to upset the juniors AND play 'peeping Tom' his punishment will be much, MUCH worse than this time. Ciao." And with that she walked off; whistling an annoyingly cheerful tune.
When Harry returned to the room he found Severus, healed and clean, scowling in the bed. He got into the blankets and picked up his book; ignoring the dark haired man beside him.
"I. AM. NEVER. GOING. TO. YOUR. DANCE. CLASSES. EVER. AGAIN." Severus seethed; Harry hummed beside him.
"Harry, are you even listening to me?" he demanded.
Harry lowered his book and glared at the man beside him. "I told you didn't I; I distinctly said to you "Don't go anywhere" what did you go and do? You left!"
Harry huffed turned back to his book. "You're lucky you're not on the couch mister; after what Cindy told me."
Severus sulked but brightened immediately when he remembered Harry's promise to him from earlier that day.
"And no sex for two weeks" Harry said not taking his eyes away from the text but seemingly reading his mind.
Severus crossed his arms in anger; life was not fair, not at all.
Okay I know not my best work but it was just a funny thing that I used to pass my time. Hope it entertained you. Please review.
P.S. Let me know if you want another lesson to be learnt by Severus.