Toying With Her
"SASORI AKASUNA, YOU GET YOUR BUTT IN HERE THIS INSTANT!!!!" yelled a very peeved wife of the said Sasori.
Sasori flinched from his spot on the couch as all of the other guys tried to hold in their laughs but failed miserably. Sasori got up and cautiously walked back to his and Sakura's room where she was waiting for him, arms crossed across her chest, foot tapping, and glaring at him.
"Yes, Darling?" Sasori asked.
"Don't 'Yes, Darling,' me! What the hell's your problem!? I was gone all of an hour to relax since I have two three-year-olds and I found out that you let them get into Deidara's clay?!!? THEY ARE A MESS AND THEY COULD'VE HURT EACH OTHER OR WORSE!!!! What do you have to say for yourself?" Sakura scolded, in her motherly tone.
"I'm...sorry?" Sasori said, uncertain.
"Damn right your sorry! Now I want you to go bathe them both!" Sakura yelled.
"But we were watching the Super bowl...." Sasori interjected. He usually didn't succumb to her will this easily, it was usually her but she was pissed...and one thing he learned from being married and being around Konan....never mess with an angry woman...especially on their period. Which she most definitely was. (If the mood swings weren't enough of a hint for him than the applicators in the trash can gave him a better idea.)
"I don't give a flying flip if you're watching the Hokage get arrested for drug abuse! I want you to go bathe those children!!! Have I made myself clear?" Sakura raged on.
"Perfectly, my little angel," Sasori said.
"Don't sweet talk me! I just want you to do as I asked you too!"
She wasn't really asking, but he decided not to push the subject further and went to find his children...
"Shizu, Senri?" Sasori called as he went into their room...to find the biggest mess of clay ever, even bigger than the messes that Deidara would create which by far were not small.
"Daddy!" they squealed at the same time.
"Hey, kids...what have you two gotten Daddy into?" Sasori stated, as he stared wide eyed at the mess. He looked back down at the young short people that were now clinging to his leg in what he supposed was a hug...only they were too short to hug anywhere but his leg. "Do you two want a bath?"
They shook their head.
"We wanna play with you, Daddy!" Shizu yelled.
"What if Daddy wants you two to be clean?" he asked as he bent down to their level.
"But we wanna play some more...." Senri replied.
"You can play after your bath," Sasori said as they hung their heads in defeat.
Sasori led them to their bathroom and quickly got them out of their messy clothes. He put their clothes into the hamper and then he filled the bath tub with warm water. He gently sat the mischievous duo into the tub.
"Yes, Shizu?" Sasori replied as he tried to clean the twins.
"What is that, that Senri has?" Shizu asked, pointing to a highly inappropriate place on a male's body. Sasori knew what she was pointing at and didn't really want to explain anything. He would've rather that his daughter had asked Sakura that...but he knew that he had to answer her someway.
"That's a penis, dear," Sasori replied, honestly, but not giving much detail.
"Why doesn't Shizu have one?" Senri asked, thinking it was ridiculous that his sister didn't have one. How did she pee?
"Because she's a girl," Sasori said. This was going to be a long conversation...
"Why don't girls have them? How do they pee?" Senri asked again.
"Girls...are built differently. They don't need a penis to pee," Sasori said as he finished bathing them. "Come on, you two, into the towels," Sasori said as he wrapped them up tightly, and hugged them both, making them laugh. They soon forgot what they were curious about as Sasori took them to put some clean clothes onto them. "Now, why won't you two go play?"
"Okay!" they replied as they ran off somewhere. Sasori shook his head as he walked back to his room.
"Hey! Are the twins clean?" Sakura asked, gleefully.
"Yes..." Sasori replied.
"Is something wrong? Did they fight?" Sakura asked, sensing something weird about Sasori like only a mother could.
"They asked a lot of questions on the different anatomy of girls and boys," Sasori said and Sakura looked at him with pity.
"How'd you handle it?" Sakura asked.
"I told them as little detail as possible," Sasori said.
"Thank you. I don't want them running around talking about that kind of stuff," Sakura replied.
"So...I did what you asked..." Sasori pushed on. Sakura raised an eyebrow at him.
"I'm not going to have sex with you right now," Sakura replied, sternly.
"You made me miss part of the super bowl," he said.
"You didn't watch the kids," she shot back and he kept quiet.
"SASORI!!! GET YOUR GOD DAMN KIDS OUT OF HERE!!!!!!!!!!" Hidan screamed from the living room. Sakura and Sasori's eyes widened. They ran to the living room.
"Hidan! Don't you ever use that kind of language around my children again! I swear if you ever do that again you don't want to know what will happen!" Sakura yelled at him.
"Well then GET THEM OUT OF HERE!!!! We're trying to watch the fucking game!!!" He made the mistake of cussing again, in front of Sakura.
"Ooh! God damn! Fucking!" Shizu yelled as she and her brother ran out of the room reciting the new words they had learned. Sakura looked like she was ready to kill someone.
"Sweetheart...take it easy. I'm sure Hidan didn't mean it," Sasori said, trying to calm her down. He'd never get sex this way.
"Damn right, I meant it. And I'd say it again!" Hidan yelled at them.
"Hidan, she's a mother. What do you think she's going to do to you for that little incident?" Kisame asked, clearly being on the bad end of Sakura's temper at one time or another.
"I don't- -fuck," he realized what she quite possibly could do to him. "Sakura, calm down. Listen to Sasori on that one," Hidan said as he slowly got up and backed up slowly to his room. Too bad it was all the way at the other end of the base. He had a twenty five percent chance of making it...make it three percent if she started running. Hidan ran as fast as he could out of the room. Sakura sat down on the couch. Deidara and Sasori looked at her for a second.
"What? I'm tired. Besides I scared him so badly that he'll be gone all day and I won't even have to beat the shit out of him," Sakura stated. Sasori shook his head.
"You are so weird sometimes," Sasori said. She smirked up at him.
"But you married me," she said, satisfied. He rolled his eyes.
"So...are you or are you not going to try and kill him?" Kisame asked.
"Nah, I feel better now. I got my anger out..."
"Good, now I can enjoy the game without fear that you'll murder us all," Kisame said, refocusing his attention to the screen.
Sorry it's a little short. I just wanted to get it up since I haven't updated in a really long time....Hope you all enjoy!