Disclaimer: As usual, nothing belongs to me, no money is made.
A/N: This is a bonus chapter written as a thank you for my patient beta reader melusin, who went through all the stress of my first SS/HG exchange fic with me, and helped me get it posted in time. This is a tender moment with mild smut. Rated R.
Bonus Chapter for Melusin
It was a soft and tender closed-mouthed kiss that apologised for being forthright, and at the same time, asked for permission to proceed. When I kissed you back in earnest, your lips opened slightly and your tongue probed carefully.
I opened my lips and let your tongue in, letting my own tongue explore your mouth as well, savouring the feel and taste of you. I marvelled how someone could be so expressive with his lips without saying anything. And then I stopped thinking altogether.
The kiss deepened; tongues explored and entwined; lips sucked on lips; hands grasped at hair and necks; bodies were pressed together until I was certain that you could feel my tight nipples through the fabric of my robes and smell my arousal, just as I could feel your erection between us.
"Come to bed," I panted when we broke the kiss to catch our breaths.
"Are you sure?" you asked in a shaky voice.
"We don't have time for games." I smiled up at you and pulled your head down for another kiss.
We finally did make it to the bed. Our increasingly passionate kisses were only interrupted by our frenzied undressing until we lay on the bed, skin touching skin, both impatient for more contact.
You pressed yourself against me; your lips wandered from my mouth to my ears and down my neck.
"Like this?" you whispered, your voice still shaking.
"Mmmmm, don't stop," I murmured. My own face was half-buried in your hair, and I didn't mind at all that it was a bit oily. Your scent was driving me insane, and I wanted to rub it all over me.
"Tell me when I do something wrong," you murmured, and let out a surprised yelp when I slightly bit your earlobe.
I chuckled. "Everything you're doing feels fantastic," I whispered in your ear, and felt you shudder. It wasn't only your voice that was shaking; your hands on my breasts, your whole body was shaking slightly, but persistently.
"Why are you trembling? Is something wrong?" I found your excitement an incredible turn-on, but it puzzled me, too. You had been so confident before we kissed.
"I... Uhm. I may need a bit of guidance with this," you murmured while you lifted your head from my neck and looked at me. A slight blush was spreading quickly from your cheeks to your chest.
I was perplexed. "What do you mean, 'guidance'? Just do what you want to do? I'm quite certain it will feel wonderful. Or is there something special you want me to do?" I swallowed and looked at you sheepishly. "I'm not all that experienced, you know."
You blinked rapidly, your jaws working. "I'm even less so," you finally choked out.
My jaw dropped. "What? Are you...?"
"A bloody virgin, yes. I never went all the way," you mumbled. A crease was forming between your eyebrows, and your blush deepened.
"Oh, dear," I gasped and drew you into another long and deep kiss. I had to – because I was trying hard not to laugh.
I'm so very sorry, Severus, but I was afraid that I would start to embarrass myself. I mean, here I was, very much in love and lying in bed with a younger version of my stern and demanding teacher, and he tells me that he is a virgin. I know it's not really funny, but your older self's face was glaring at me in my mind, calling me an insufferable know-it-all while you were asking me for guidance, and I felt like laughing hysterically. Of course I couldn't, wouldn't tell you, or laugh at you, because you wouldn't have understood, and it would have hurt you. I would never want to hurt you, ever.
Kissing calmed us both down and renewed the excitement. When I felt composed enough again, I broke the kiss and stroked your cheek, smiling. "Good thing, then, that I'm not a virgin anymore – although I'm not that far ahead of you."
You were just staring at me, the half-frown still creasing your brows. I had never thought that I would see you so vulnerable. I felt that almost reflexive urge to hug you, tell you it would be all right, get all caring and supportive, but I didn't think that you'd really appreciate any of this. Admitting your inexperience must have been awkward for you, and I felt very elated that you trusted me enough to risk it. So, instead of reassuring you, I giggled.
"It won't hurt you, you know – no blood," I quipped.
Your frown turned into a scowl, but I just held you firmly in my arms, grinned cheekily and wriggled my eyebrows. And slowly, slowly, the scowl faded, and you started to laugh. You laughed so hard that you collapsed on top of me. Your laughter was beautiful and infectious, and we laughed together, bursting into new bouts of laughter simply by looking at each other. Finally, we were able to stop; we both had to catch our breaths. You were lying motionless on top of me, your head buried in my neck. When you finally lifted your head and looked at me again, the smile that was lightening up your eyes slowly changed into an expression of desire and longing. I felt your erection hard between us once again; it had faded a little while we had been laughing. The expression in your eyes took my breath away.
"Severus," I gasped. "I want you so much. Everything you do will be wonderful." I pushed you onto your back and kissed your lips, your face, and a line from your jaw to your collarbone, marvelling at the texture of your skin and breathing you in, all the while tasting and touching. Your accelerated breathing showed me that you liked what I was doing. I kept kissing you, moving down to your chest and to your nipples where I paused and nipped at each, being rewarded with small yelps, gasps and sighs. I put a hand over your heart and felt it hammer against your ribs. I savoured the warmth of your skin, the crispness of the sparse hairs on your chest and the smooth feeling of your naked skin under my hands. I had wanted to touch that skin for a while now, ever since I had watched you sleeping and had realised what I felt for you. And now there was no stopping me.
My hands wandered carefully down your belly while my lips still lingered on your chest. I was licking your navel, and then I stroked your loins and closed in on your cock. You rose up with a soft groan when I finally touched it. I took a firmer hold and started to stroke. The sounds you made delighted and encouraged me. When I took your balls in my hand and squeezed softly, you moaned.
"Helena," you rasped out. "If you continue this, I won't last long."
"Then we'll just start all over again," I whispered before taking you into my mouth. A gasp, a few strokes with hands, tongue and lips, and you came. I smirked at your astonished and delighted face, and you reached down and pulled me up on top of you to kiss me again: thoroughly, long and lovingly. We were lost in that kiss for what appeared an eternity until I finally felt how you hardened again. With an unexpected twist, you turned us around until you were lying on top of me.
"Your turn," you whispered, and you did to my body what I had done to yours a short while before. Apparently, my moans and sighs of appreciation egged you on since you attacked all my sensitive spots with enthusiasm and tenacity, slowly exploring my body with your lips and hands. When your head had finally found its place between my legs, and your tongue, lips and fingers did the most marvellous things to my sensitive spots, I couldn't keep my calm any longer. I squirmed, moaned and sighed, praised and directed you until a first small climax shook me.
"Severus, I need you. I want you. Now," I cried out.
All I could hear from you was a low growl, but you moved up again, your weight resting on your arms. With a bit of fumbling from both of us, you found your target and slowly slid inside me. It felt incredible.
"Don't... don't move just yet," I breathed. This felt so right. We fitted together perfectly. None of my past encounters had been like this. I had thought that I had loved before, but these feelings were nothing compared to what I now felt for you. In comparison, my past 'experience' felt like crushes and teenage experimentation. Feeling you inside me, stretching me, filling me, was the most wonderful sensation I had ever experienced. I had never felt so complete before. I wanted to cry, laugh and shout at the same time.
"All right?" you asked softly. The look of wonder and joy you gave me made me think that this feeling of completeness might be mutual, not one-sided.
"Yes," I gasped. "Never been better."
"Nor I," you whispered and started to move, tentatively at first but with increasing confidence. I lost all sense of time and space; all my senses were filled with you, only you. My incoherent sounds were directing and encouraging you, and soon you were hitting just the right spots, again and again until I was gasping out in my ecstasy. With a groan of triumph and joy, you came shortly after me.
If that was your first time, you were a natural, I thought while we lay together, still joined, both sticky from sweat and other fluids and breathing heavily. But then it dawned on me that you would have been using very basic Legilimency on me. For a brief moment I panicked; I had completely forgotten to Occlude. But I calmed down quickly. Apart from my brief attack of silliness in the beginning, I had never thought about my real persona, about the future, about my task in the past. Besides, you hadn't been intruding my mind but rather reading my emotions and physical reactions. My thoughts and feelings had been focussed on you alone anyway, and thus all you saw while reading me were my honest and true emotions. Nevertheless, I chastised myself; I would have to be careful to keep some of my thoughts hidden now.
"I wish times were different, and my life wasn't filled with obligations," you finally whispered. "Then I could ask you to stay."
"I wish the same," I murmured. "Then I could stay."
We rested a bit, whispering endearments to each other. After a while, you asked, "Can we do this again?"
I laughed softly and started to attack every inch of your body once more with hands and lips.
We didn't sleep that night. We made love again and again, and only when the sun came up did you kiss me tenderly one last time and say softly, "I must leave you now."