Her heart fell a little more as Squall turned to exit the cockpit of the Ragnarok. True, he had done what she wanted, issued the command to head to Edea's house, but it did nothing to alleviate her fear. She choked on a sob when she felt an insistent leather tug on her arm. She looked up just as he began to tug her out of the room. Her eyes flashed wildly as she was pulled through the doorway, then it slid shut blocking her view. He continued to tug, pulling her stumbling after him to one of the side rooms. When he released her arm she finally regained her balance and looked up.

The room had been modified a little. Bed rolls were lined against the wall along with a few bundles. She looked around bewildered as Squall strode across the room dumping his gloves, jacket, and weapon on the ground. He unrolled two of the bedrolls before having a seat and kicking his shoes away. Looking up he frowned at her hesitation before he spoke.

"Come here."

She looked up, her teary browns meeting clouded grey. He gestured and she followed the movement. Meeting his eyes again a little fear crept into them. Letting out a sigh of exasperation his mouth opened and closed a few times before he repeated himself.

"Come here." He patted the roll beside him to emphasize his point. She approached slowly, surprisingly being a little shy. When she got close enough, he quirked an eyebrow and grabbed her hand, yanking her down beside him. She yelped in surprise as her bottom hit the blanket. His hands immediately went to her ankles pulling at her laces and removing the shoes. She sat stunned as she watched him fight the tangles. He rolled her socks down and tossed them next to her shoes. She couldn't read the expression on his face as he turned to face her, only knew it meant he was serious. His hands moved towards her chest, but she made no move to stop him. Just before they reached her he stopped and looked into her eyes. Watching him, his fingers trembling, and his breath quickened, she was curious as to what he was going to do next and for a moment forgot her great fear. She gave him a little smile and his fingertips gently grazed her breast. A moments fidgeting and her blue duster was unbuttoned. He slowly pushed it back over her shoulders, removing the garment. As she was about to help him by moving off of the bottom his arms encircled her, lifting her bodily into his lap as he leaned back against the wall.

The movement surprised her, helping her tongue to unwind. "Squall, what are you doing?"

She watched as the play of emotions overtook his eyes. So many things tumbled through the storm that for a moment he seemed lost before he shook his head slightly. He hugged her tighter, burying his face in her hair before she heard the answer rumble out.

"I don't know. What I want. I want to feel alive and not forgotten. I want for you to feel alive. I want to say sorry. That I'm sorry I left you there. That you were right. That…."

She brought up her hand to hush his lips and returned his tight embrace. She tried not to cry as he held her, not wanting the embrace to break, but eventually she had to give in. As the first sob shook her his hold loosened. She clung desperately to the front of his shirt as he pulled away. When his hand found her chin she fought him, thinking he was going to push her off. He changed tactics, grabbing her by the shoulders and forcing her back. Before she could dissolve into her tears she felt his lips on hers.

Her eyes nearly popped out before drooping closed again as she lost herself in the kiss. She had never imagined her first kiss with Squall would be like this. He was rough, but not in a dominating way. It was a desperate kiss. Full of everything Squall wanted to say and show but swallowed down for fear of loss. And just when she thought the kiss would end, he deepened it even further, pouring all of that emptiness, fear, and heartache into it. She should have been crushed. This deluge should have drowned her. Instead she was elated.

She didn't notice the shift in positions. He was now on top of her, one arm under her back crushing her against him; the other had come up and even now was slipping his ammunition belt off his hips. The spare bullets landed with a loud clunk beside her, but she spared the belts no attention. Her hands were hopelessly tangled in his long hair. When his lips moved from hers she tried to trail after them longingly, until he moved to her throat. He tried to devour her; tongue, teeth, and lips gliding across her collarbone before coming to rest at the top of her shirt. He snarled as the material caught him up, his hands moving to shove the material aside. He attacked her breasts as they came free; using both hands to pull her back up to his face.

She was lost, gasping at this unexpected outpouring from him, but determined not to be left behind. Her hands roamed down his back, finding the hem of his shirt she yanked upwards, wanting to feel his bare skin. He growled as the shirt came over his head, having to release her to pull it off. It was angrily thrown towards the doorway just as the automated system opened it. They both failed to notice as the shirt hit a bull's-eye.

Zell quickly pawed the white cloth out of his face. His jaw fell open when he saw what was taking place in front of him. Rinoa was on her back writhing, her shirt pulled down just enough to free her breasts, which luckily for her were covered by the head of Squall. Zell hesitated, not sure of the best way to interrupt before it occurred to him. He backed quietly out of the room, the shirt still in his hands and made his way back to the cockpit. Once there he ignored the questioning looks of the rest of the party and went to the intercom.

Rinoa and Squall groaned in irritation as they heard the chime of the loudspeaker.

"Uh…Commander….we're at Edea's house. We'll wait in the cockpit."

Rinoa giggled as Squall climbed off of her. He looked down shyly.

"I'm sorry, Rinoa. I didn't mean…"

He trailed off as she stared at him. Not really sure what to say she began getting dressed in silence, still a little overwhelmed. She finished tying her shoes and looked again at Squall. He was still topless, looking around for his shirt.

"You can't find it."


"Just put on another one."

He shrugged and gave up, dropping to his knees to rummage around in his pack. As he pulled it over his head she picked up his jacket, handing it to him when he was finished. When they had stood and were about to leave she tugged on his hand, stopping him. He looked confused when she hugged him.

"Don't be sorry." She whispered against his chest. She felt him nod and they parted heading towards the bridge. The door to the bridge opened and a white shirt hit Squall directly in the face. She looked over at Zell who had thrown it and blushed a deep red at his cheesy grin.