Disclaimer: The characters are not mine but the insanity is. Go find your own psychosis.


A Bregan D'Aerthe meeting room.

Jarlaxle: (businesslike) So what can you do for Bregan D'Aerthe?

Kimmuriel: I can read minds.

Jarlaxle: Oh really? (amused) So what am I thinking now?

Kimmuriel: ... You have a shield of some kind. An external shield if you want me to be specific.

Jarlaxle: (taps his eye patch) Good to know that when I ordered this thing made "all concealing" it actually is. What else?

Kimmuriel: I can excite the energies in an object until it explodes.

Jarlaxle: (unimpressed) I can do that with whole noble houses with more spectacular results. Try again.

Kimmuriel: (Getting a little worried) Teleporting?

Jarlaxle: (yawns) Which any wizard can do with a spell. Really, you are starting to bore me.

Kimmuriel: (irritated) Then what would you like me to do?

Jarlaxle: (opens a drawer, pulls out a spoon and holds up the utensil)

Kimmuriel: You must be joking.

Jarlaxle: No, I don't think I am.

Kimmuriel: This is humiliating.

Jarlaxle: No, this is an audition. Humiliating would be if there were other people around. Now do you want in or or shall I dump you back with your female relations?

Kimmuriel: (makes a small gesture and the spoon bends at a right angle) You win.

Jarlaxle: (grins) I always win. And in this case, so do you. Welcome to Bregan D'Aerthe.

Kimmuriel: (sighs resignedly)


Author's note: I apologize if the characters seem a bit off from canon. On the other hand, I hope it was an amusing minute spent on this fic. Now the reviews button would respectfully ask that you spend a minute on it and give it some love in the form of a message. Happy web surfing!