author's note: As before, I own nothing. I invoke my right to not incriminate myself. You can't prove a thing, I tell you! The following Harry Potter outtakes are not intended to represent the actors in the Harry Potter movies or any other real persons.

If you like these, please be sure to read and review my original "Potteroops" series. And ... action!


"I've never seen spiders behaving like that," said Hermione.

"No, nor have I – have you, Ron? Ron?"

Ron was standing well back from the spiders and bobbing his head rhythmically, his eyes blissfully closed.

"Ron? Rooooonnie..." said Hermione, waving her hand in front of Ron's freckled face. Ron didn't respond. His eyes were still closed. She nudged him, but he ignored her. He seemed to be humming a tune.

Hermione started to walk in a circle around Ron, examining him closely. After a moment, she pointed her wand at him and said: "Accio!" With a pop like a cork, two small white objects zoomed out of Ron's ears, right into her hand. Ron's eyes opened and he looked at her reproachfully.

"Ron! Pay attention, you just missed your line!" she scolded.

"Aww ... give those back!"

"What are they?" asked Hermione, frowning.

"Some prototype Fred and George dreamed up. Musical earplugs. They got the idea from a Muggle toy." Ron made a grab for the earplugs, but Hermione passed them to Harry.

Harry held one up to his ear. He could hear, faint and tinny, the voices of the Weird Sisters issuing from it.

"Those're mine, mate," said Ron, holding out his hand for them.

"Not any more. Accio!" said a voice from offscreen. The earplugs zoomed straight to McGonagall. "You can have these back ... after work."

She stuck them in her own ears, and Ron's mouth opened, about to say something, but McGonagall cheerfully called out, "Try it again, take two!" as she leaned back in her chair and enjoyed the music herself. Ron had no choice but to get back to the spiders.