A Short Prologue on How Peter Griffin Lost Everything
Public drunkenness was a bit of a hobby for Peter Griffin. His best friend, his talking dog Brian, knew that only too well, usually electing to take the stupid man home, despite the fact that he was often as sloshed as Peter was.
However, this day was different. Not only were both Peter and Brian completely wasted, but they had broken their silent vow to not interact with any women at the bar. Brian started it: he sidled up to a younger woman that often babysat for the Griffins, Cassandra Buchem. Cassandra, as Brian knew when he was sober, was far from interested in men, especially since a rather sticky situation where she ended up brainwashed into falling in love with the neighborhood pervert, Glen Quagmire. So Cassie didn't really appreciate Brian hitting on her. She also didn't appreciate him buying her a drink, seeing as she was only seventeen. Cassie ended up dumping her drink on, which would have ended the altercation if Peter hadn't been drunk as well.
Peter punched Cassie, and tried to fight her. Cassie, terrified, called the police. In the end, Peter was sentenced to four years in jail for battery, aggravated assault, and abuse to a minor. Due to good behavior in jail, his sentence was halved.
And although there's a hilarious story involving Peter Griffin's stay in jail, now is not the right time to tell it. One day I'll probably get around to it. This story is about something entirely different.
…But seriously, it was hysterical, what happened in jail. Peter decided that he was going to create a musical, to keep up morale amongst the rapists and stuff…
Damn it, I STILL told the stupid story! Ugh… Okay. Seriously, guys, this story is about how Peter Griffin managed to best one of the most powerful people on the eastern seaboard.
It all started right after Peter was released from jail…
A/N: Before you go, 'that's IT?!', notice that the real first chapter's been posted. Continue on, brave soldier.