Fran Goes on Jerry Springer
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Mjrn was licking at a lollipop. From the look on Fran's face, everyone could tell exactly what she was thinking.
"NO. This is my candy. You don't get to take any more food and put it anywhere. I need to keep my blood sugar through the roof. Doctor's orders. I saw a healer before I left the Wood, after all. She said I couldn't let my blood sugar get too low." Mjrn growled when Fran tried to snatch the candy.
"I don't think it should be too high. Let me take that…" Fran began. Mjrn kicked her.
"It isn't too high, and it's staying the hell out of your cunt!"
"Mjrn, please. I'll do whatever you want, just please, please, stop the swearing!" Balthier pleaded.
"Can I come with you and Fran to the sexateria next year?"
Vaan sat down on the stage. Mjrn went and sat next to him.
"Aren't you happy we get to go to the sexateria next year?" Mjrn asked.
"Yeah, but don't you already have a man?"
"I TOLD you already. He ran off with some cute little Feol we met. Or at least she said she was a Feol. I don't know. She certainly didn't have wings or anything. Didn't look any different than the rest of the stupid Viera we've met. That's why I need someone to help me take care of my kits."
"I have candy!"
"Oh look. Licorice. I HATE LICORICE!! I WANT CHOCOLATE WITH COCONUT CREAM! I NEED IT! I'M CRAVING IT!"
"Mjrn, no need to yell. I don't have any of that. Fran took off with the rest of the food earlier, and this is all I have that hasn't been up her pussy."
"I wonder why that fascinates her so much. That carrot really hurt. That sister of mine sure got stupid when she left the Wood. Oh my whatever-the-hell-I-choose-to-believe-in-next! Am I going to turn stupid like her?"
"Probab… NO. Of course not! Fran was probably stupid to begin with."
"Yeah, maybe. Of course, I do not remember her ever acting like that before she left."
Fran got in between her sister and Vaan. "HELLO! THE LOVE CONNECTION IS OVER! This is called 'Fran Goes on Jerry Springer', not 'A really stupid Viera and her even stupider boyfriend blather inanely'!" Fran yelled.
"I always thought it was called 'Fran makes an idiot out of herself: Part I'!" Mjrn screeched.
"You be nice or no 'So many Vieras you can't believe it.' For the Mjrn!"
"Fran, you're a retard."
"You just realizing that now?" Balthier said to himself.
"Ashe? Am I a retard?" Penelo asked.
"Hell yeah!" Ashe exclaimed.
"Awww… you're mean."
"I'm gonna tell Basch how mean you are, and then he won't marry you."
"WHAT WAS THAT? WAS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE A THREAT?! YOU'RE AN EVEN BIGGER IDIOT THAN I THOUGHT!"
"YAY! I'm not a retard, I'm an idiot!"
Fran took Vaan's licorice, then after realizing that Mjrn hated it, shoved it down her pussy like everything else. Mjrn vomited all over Vaan.
"See Fran? You have a problem. You're sickening your sister!" Balthier complained.
"No I'm not! She's having a bunch of kittens too! It's morning sickness. And besides, that's just how she shows Vaan that she loves him!" Fran yelled at the top of her lungs. "C'mon Mjrn! Tell him!"
"No. I don't like this game of yours!"
"And that's the end of the show for today! Say goodbye, because I'm never letting another Viera on my show again. Now I know why Maury never lets them on his show…" Jerry said. Fran seemed very offended. The show cut to credits just as the Viera launched herself at the talk show host and ripped his lungs out.