If I owned Naruto, everybody would be gay. But I don't, and they're not. XD

A/N: I just decided to make some more, after reading a few fics about Sakura joining the Akatsuki. I'm not sure if I'm going to really have Sasori. I haven't done anything with Tobi in a while.

Summary: You'd think living with a bunch of guys would be great, but not when they're all lecherous! And what's worse, you're falling in love with one… SasoSaku in later chapters.

Anyway, thanks for reading!

"I need help." Sakura admitted. "From the Akatsuki."

The figure grinned. "Well. You need help? With what?"

"I need training. I can't just stand around healing people. I need the skills and experience of fighting."

"Really? Why?" the figure asked. He stepped closer, out the shadows, so that the light that came in through the branches could illuminate his face and scruffy red hair.

"I need to… to find someone. A boy."

"A boy?" Akasuna no Sasori asked, frowning.

"The little brother of Itachi." Sakura explained. "Sasuke."

"Hmm… you're in love with him?"

"NO." Sakura denied. "I was, once. Not anymore."

"Fine." Sasori said, glancing her up and down in a way that made Sakura feel… rather uncomfortable. "You do know there's a price to join."

"A price?"

"Yes. Usually, we make the males pay in blood… but you're a different case…" Sasori said, walking forward. Sakura then realized that, perhaps, she was the only female Sasori had seen in a long time.

"And what would that be?" she asked warily.

"I'll show you…"

WHAM! Sakura landed a forceful knee into Sasori's gut, causing him to lose his breath. He crumpled to the ground, where Sakura began pounding her shoe into his face.

"Die, you lecherous puppet!" she hissed, kicking him a few more times.

"Ow! Ow! Ow!" Sasori cried with each kick. Apparently, his nose had been broken off, and was lying on the ground next to him.

Finding her job done, Sakura brushed her hands off on her skirt. "Serves you right." She growled, glaring at him.

"Feisty." Sasori grumbled, earning him a few kicks in the groin.

"Calm yourself, Sakura." Said a figure, emerging from the darkness. She was a delicate female, wearing the same Akatsuki robe as Sasori. Her hair was blue, long, and a paper flower sat in her hair. An origami butterfly fluttered next to her. "You must understand. An organization of only men, and they'd do anything to get laid." Konan mused.

Sakura blinked. "You're… in the Akatsuki?"

"The only female… until now. After that demonstration, I feel that you are welcome to join us."

Sakura gave a small bow. "Thank you very much."

"Please. Call me Konan-san. Sasori-san, get up. We're going."

Sasori was trying to reattach his nose, and nodded.

"And don't try anything stupid while we're returning to base. I'll slice you to ribbons… and then I'll slice your ribbons to ribbons."

"That sounds marvelous." Sasori grumbled.

Sakura found the outfit rather comforting. She smiled, glancing at herself in the mirror. Of course, her pink hair stood out against the black and red and white, but it still looked rather stylish.

They had entered, and Konan had explained the situation.

"A girl?" Kisame grumbled. "Geez. Waste of space if you ask me."

It looked like Itachi was staring at her boobs, but he glanced up. "Kisame? Who's there? Is it Konan? Who is this?"

Tobi had latched onto her with surprising strength and kept talking to her in a third person perspective.

Deidara was comforting Sasori (who didn't want to be comforted) that he had been beaten by a girl.

Pein and Zetzu weren't there at all. Nor were Hidan and Kakuzu.

"They'll show up in time, Sakura-chan. Be patient." Konan assured her.

Sakura nodded.

"Anyways, Sakura wishes to learn to fight. She will stay with us, and help us capture the Jinchuuriki." Konan said. "Therefore, she must join one of the partnerships. Anybody not have a partner?"

The room was silent.

"Come on, people." Konan said. "One of you?"

"Nope." Kisame said after a short pause. "Even Zetzu's with Tobi right now…"

"There'll have to be a threesome, then. When one of you goes out on a mission, take Sakura with you."

There was a small murmur of approval. Not happy approval, of course, but you didn't argue with Konan.

"Back to your duties, everyone." Konan said, and walked off, but not before smiling at Sakura. "Don't worry. They won't do anything when they know I'm keeping watch on you." She whispered, sticking a small paper star in her hair. Giving a small nod, Konan vanished.

Sakura was aware of the groups splitting off, except for Tobi.

"Come on!" Tobi cried happily. "I wanna show you around!"

Tobi bounced off, and Sakura started to follow, but not before she was aware of eyes on her back. Spinning around, she saw no one.

"Come on, Sakura-chan!" Tobi cried. Sakura nodded and followed.

There was a small pause. "Coming, Sasori-danna, hmm?" Deidara asked. Sasori glanced at him.

"Oh, yes. Coming, Deidara." Sasori said, and quickly followed Deidara into the blackness of the cave.

Hope I'll get up Chapter 2 soon. It'll be mostly SasoSaku, but there might be TobiSaku too.

Anyway, have a good day/afternoon/evening!