By Mabel Marsters
Disclaimer: They're all Joss Whedon's.
Little bit of 'Douglas Adams' crept in with the Giles bit. If you don't recognise the bit I'm not telling! Did change it a little.
Slots in to season four after 'New Man' and the first half of 'The I in Team', before Maggie Walsh tries to kill Buffy.
Spike – has chip in head and just moved into own crypt.
Giles – had to have Spike's help (paid for) when he'd been turned into a Fyarl demon. Removed tracer from Spike (charged for).
Buffy – wrapped up with Riley and her new access to The Initiative.
I've put any 'thoughts' they have in italics to save getting mixed up!
Spike could hear the fight in the graveyard as soon as he stepped out of his crypt.
"Bloody hell. What's the Slayer up to now?" he muttered and went to watch the action, 'You never know, I might actually get to see her get her ass kicked.'
Smiling, he headed over towards the ruckus. As he approached he could see Buffy in combat with a huge demon. It was a perfectly grotesque green, covered in lumps, and had an extra eye in the middle of its forehead that glowed a dull orange.
Spike saw the Giles standing to one side, moving from foot to foot in his usual indecisive manner, shouting instructions to the Slayer.
"Go for the eye," he yelled.
"I'm trying to," Buffy yelled back, thrusting her sword at the beast.
Spike ambled over to Giles.
"Having a bit of bother, are we?" he said with his usual smirk.
"Help her, Spike," said Giles, wincing on Buffy's behalf as the demon threw her backwards, her body slamming into a headstone.
"Now why should I do that?" drawled Spike, "This is much more fun."
Buffy leapt up, picked up the sword she'd dropped as she'd flown through the air, and ran the demon through with it. At that precise moment, the demon, who had turned to face Giles and Spike, suddenly let out a roar. Its third eye opened wide and a blinding shaft of orange light flew from it, hitting both Giles and Spike and blowing them off their feet, then depositing them with crushing force some twenty feet away. They both lay still.
"Giles!" cried Buffy. She pulled her sword from the demon's belly. It fell to the ground as she did then disappeared in a puff of orange smoke. She ran to where they lay.
"Giles, are you okay?" she knelt beside him, taking his hand.
He started to stir and, with a groan, he sat up, putting his free hand up to his head, which was throbbing abominably.
"I'm ..I'm alright," he stuttered.
"What the hell was that?" asked Buffy.
"Not too sure," he said, looking around, "Where is it?"
"It's gone. Just went 'poof' after I'd killed it," said Buffy.
Spike moaned and got up.
"I'm fine, by the way. Thanks for asking," he said.
"Whatever," said Buffy.
Spike huffed at her. "God, I need a drink," he said and he staggered off to his trusty stash of JD in his crypt.
Buffy helped Giles get to his feet.
"We're done?" she said, "No more slayage? No more patrolling?"
"For tonight, yes, we're done," said Giles weakly. It'd been hard enough to get her to patrol in the first place and he knew she couldn't wait to get back to Riley.
The next morning…
Spike woke up and God, he felt like crap. 'I must have overdone it with the JD after that demon did its 'glowy' thing.'
He opened his eyes and saw to his amazement a white painted ceiling above him, not the cobwebbed stone of his crypt.
"Did I get lucky last night? Can't remember going out again.'
He went to sit up and his body felt odd, heavy somehow. He looked down at his hand and was startled by two things – firstly, it was bathed in light. A ray of sun from the open curtains was enveloping it and swiftly on that revelation's heels was the realisation it wasn't his hand!
'What the f…..'
He leapt out of bed and looked down at the rest of himself. The sight wasn't a pretty one, due to the blue and red striped pyjama bottoms and what was going on with his stomach? It certainly was no longer it's usual taut, flat self. Plus his feet looked somewhat further away.
Baffled, he looked around the room. Things looked a bit fuzzy. Without realising he'd done it he put on the pair of glasses that had been on the bedside table. Things got clearer; well, his sight got clearer.
He walked down the stairs and in the mirror facing him he could see Giles walking down them.
"Giles!" Spike said and whirled around. He wasn't there. "Where the hell have you gone?"
He froze, standing stock-still. The voice. It wasn't his own. It sounded like….
He spun back round to the mirror.
"Giles! Sodding hell," said Spike, looking at his reflection, "I'm bloody Giles."
At exactly the same time...
Giles woke up with a start, then regretted it. He squeezed his eyes closed against the pounding in his head. He felt a bit 'green'. He pushed the covers off and swung his feet over the edge of the bed where they dangled, not reaching the floor.
"That's odd. My bed's not that high."
He opened his eyes and looked around. He was in Spike's crypt.
"What am I doing in Spike's crypt?"
He looked around but there was no sign of the vampire. He pushed himself off the tomb that had served as his bed, kicking over an empty bottle of JD, which explained the head pounding. Something wasn't right. He hadn't landed with his usual thud but with something like feline grace, landing lightly on his bare feet. He looked down at his feet.
"Good lord!" he exclaimed, as he realised he was naked, his voice echoing around the crypt.
"Oh my God," he said as he realised the naked body wasn't his own.
"Not again," said Giles. He'd only just gotten over the fact Ethan had turned him into a Fyarl demon.
"Least this time I'm still human." He glanced at 'his' body again, Yes, definitely human, a rather lean fit human by all accounts."
He looked around for some clothes. He could see a pile carefully folded on the floor. He picked them up and saw that they looked like Spike's but, no matter, they'd do. And Spike wasn't around so shouldn't miss them. A thought wandered through his mind trying to connect with something, something he'd missed earlier. No, he couldn't place it. He shrugged, decided not to put on Spike's jacket, certain the vampire wouldn't approve of it, and walked to the door to the crypt.
He pulled it open, but as the light flooded in he gave out a yell and slammed it shut again. It had burned! He looked down at his faintly smouldering hand. Suddenly the thought floating through his mind connected with something, his voice hadn't been his own - it'd been…
"Spike! Oh my God, I'm Spike!"
to be continued……..