Disclamer: I do not own Naruto.
Dedicated to: My good friend Sammie, who loves Sasuke with a passion, and I promised to write a non-yaoi fic for.
Not My Hero
By Akira E. A.
There are things in life that are made to be destroyed. Apparently, I have always been one of these things. I was living one of the most idea lives, and it was shattered. It wouldn't be as huge of a thing to me if a stranger shattered it, but it wasn't. My life has been falling apart around me for years because my brother, my idol, my hero, my own flesh and blood, killed everyone I loved.
Not only was it that secret of the Sharingan's true purpose that hardened me, it was also fear. Fear in the knowledge that he wanted me to kill my closest friend, fear that he might come back to kill if I ever loved again, and fear that I would have to relive that nightmare.
That's the only way I like to think of that night- a nightmare. It was nothing more then that. If I didn't have to fuel my revenge with this hatred, I would try to forget I ever had a family. I would forget I had a beautiful mother that was always so kind to me. I would forget that I had a strong father, one not nearly as kind or as lovely as my mother, but still a good father. And most importantly, I would forget that I had a brother. Forget that I had someone who was my world. Forget that I had someone I looked up to. Forget all of those things he meant to me.
But I can't forget. I must live with the sickening memory of our old bonds. After all, our bonds make us strong. Our bonds keep us alive.
But he broke those bonds, just as I tried to do with Naruto-who was also a brother to me. I had the chance to kill him, to become powerful just like Itachi wanted. But I was not going to let myself sink so low as to get power at his request.
I didn't break our bonds that night, but I did sever them, or at least that's how I like to think of it. I hurt him, and I left Konoha-my home. I left behind everything. I left behind the sensei that was like a father to me. I left behind the blonde that was just like a brother. And I left behind the girl I wish ever came into my life-she was nothing but annoying, after all.
I made my way to the village hidden in the Sound. The one that was run by Orochimaru the sannin, the one that wanted me as his next body. I knew of his intent, and before I even left the Leaf, I started to plan away to get through it. There was no way that I was going to let him use my body, in any way.
The plan was always formulating in my mind, that and the plot for revenge. I would walk silently through those dark, stone halls. They always seemed to be closing in on me with every shallow breath I took. I would have lost my mind if it weren't for the thought of revenge.
And when I killed Orochimaru, I didn't feel. His words ran through my head. "You'll never be able to kill Itachi if you can't kill your own emotions." Well now I couldn't feel emotion if I wanted to. I left that night with nothing; only the knowledge I gained through my experiences and my katana. Possessions didn't mean anything in revenge.
And when I told the others to wait, I wanted them to wait. When I saw Itachi, I wanted to scream and lash out at him. I knew better. I remained calm.
And now as I make my way to where he told us to meet, I silently wonder if I'll be able to. I'm sure that I'm strong enough, but will my hate allow it?
After all, he's my brother. He's my own flesh and blood. I may not love him as if he was anymore, but I still think I may have a small bit of love for him still. It's almost depressing. He's done nothing but make sure I fell apart, just as it appears I was made to do, and do it passionately.
I hate him, but he was once my world. He was once my soul reason for training so hard, and he still it- even making me go so far as to leave behind everything. He was once my hero, but now he isn't. He isn't anything to me anymore, or at least that's what I assure myself. He's only a source of hate. Because now, he's not my hero.
Angst much? Anyway. Reviews are loved, and I'm working on Chapter two of SAF. I've written it five times, and I'm not satasfied with it. So here is something in the mean time.