"The Redhead and the Three Bishies" By: Shoujo's Revenge

Summary: An altered version of Goldilocks and the Three Bears. Ryou x Shizuka, Malik x Shizuka, YnBakura x Shizuka

Disclaimer: Kazuki Takahashi owns Yuugioh.

A/N: I wrote this story in May and didn't bother to finish it. It's supposed to be a silly version of an old and familiar story.

Warning: Slight out-of-character actions.

Once upon a time there was a beautiful redheaded girl named Shizuka. She was so pretty that she was nicknamed Kawai (cute) Shizuka. While many boys wanted her to be their girlfriend, she didn't want any of them to be her boyfriend, not even Domino Village's most popular boy named Otogi. As polite and humble as she appears, she was actually somewhat vain on the inside. She wished to have a boyfriend as beautiful as she is. The Dice Monsters inventor and champion for his beauty was raved by the village girls. However, she didn't think he was that pretty.

Once upon a time there were three beautiful boys that lived in the edge of the forest. They were so beautiful that many girls stalked them and treated them like they were members of a boy band. That's why they're living so far from the village. Their names are Bakura, Malik and Ryou. Bakura was the well-known Thief King of the village and wants to rule the world. Malik used to be the tombkeeper of the Domino Village graves. Ryou was the quiet and pleasant boy who just wanted a nice girlfriend. A nice girlfriend who could help him with the cleaning once in a while because Malik and Bakura are driving him mad with their plans of village domination. Not to mention their dirty laundry!

In the cottage of the Jounouchi siblings, Jounouchi was asking his little sister if she could bring their grandma a basket of food. Their grandma was sick, not to mention her cupboards were empty. Shizuka said, "But onni-chan, our grandma died a long time ago."

"I know," said Jounouchi. "By 'grandma', I meant the fair lady Mai." A sweat drop appeared in the back of Shizuka's head.

"If she's so fair, then why did you just call her our grandma?"

"Because she hates it when I call her old," said a grinning Jounouchi.

"Why don't you just admit it? You like Mai. You two argue like you're already married." Her brother blushed.

"Shizuka! I'm going to get you for that!" Shizuka ran out of the cottage with a giggle before he could catch up with her. And off to the forest she went for lady Mai lived deep in the forest.

In the Bishounen cottage, Bakura was holed up in his room, planning how to overtake the village. Malik was just sitting in the tiny living room trying to knit a sweater. Ryou was busy in the kitchen making porridge for lunch.

"Ryou, what's for lunch?" Malik half-yelled and half-asked after his stomach growled.

"I'm making porridge!" Ryou answered.

"Again?!" Bakura and Malik groaned at the same time. Yes, Bakura could hear them for the walls are thin.

"Why don't one of you two make something for once?!" Ryou snapped.

"You're the only one who can make something edible." Malik answered casually, obviously not noticing the overworked boy's hostility.

"Why in the witch's name did Mai have to move in the damn forest?!" Shizuka grumbled. There were tiny twigs and leaves that were stuck to her usually straight auburn hair. Her dark green dress was torn in random places. Her slender fingers ran through her hair in an attempt to tame it. A trickle of blood ran down her left arm unbeknownst to her. Suddenly, she realized that while looking left and right; she was completely lost! There were just trees to the left and trees to the right. Just trees and more trees.

A growling sound distracted her frustration of being lost in the middle of basically of nowhere. She clutched her stomach; it was lunchtime. That's when she discovered…

"Oh! I forgot to take the basket of food!" She screamed causing all the birds to fly out of the trees. "Oh, man. Now what am I going to do? At least if I had Mai's basket, I could've eaten it." And so, she walked on, hoping that she'll stumble onto a familiar pathway.

Meanwhile, Ryou, Malik and Bakura was about to 'enjoy' a bowl of porridge (Bakura and Malik was imagining their bowls were something else) when someone knocked on the door.

"You get it," Bakura and Malik said simultaneously. Ryou threw down his napkin and pushed his chair back from the table in irritation.

"Ryou do this, Ryou do that," he grumbled as he strolled to the door. "Yes?" He opened the door to reveal Rebecca, Vivian, Miho and Mana. The door was quickly slammed in their faces. Noting the horrified look on Ryou's face, Malik and Bakura already figured it out.

"Damn! The fan girls found out where we lived!" Malik panicked.

"Double damn! I thought that was your hot sister," Bakura said which earned him a look of reproach from Malik.

"I know, she's really beautiful," Ryou muttered absentmindedly. He was still barricading the door to keep the rabid fan girls from entering.

"RYOU! Not you, too?" Ryou blushed.

"In any case, we have to get out of here!" He succeeded in changing the subject. They pushed the table in front of the door to keep the fan girls out while they made their escape through the back door.

Traipsing through the eerily quiet forest, Shizuka finally caught sight of a small cottage at the forest's edge. She saw a group of disappointed girls coming out of it. They were grumbling and clutching some pieces of clothes.

"Are they burglars?" Shizuka whispered. Whatever the case was, she was going to see if there was any food in there.

A/N: The second half and final chapter of this story will only be installed if you review. If you don't, then that just means I don't have to write it.

Alternate Scene

In the cottage of the Jounouchi siblings, Jounouchi was asking his little sister if she could bring their grandma a basket of food. Their grandma was sick, not to mention her cupboards were empty. Shizuka said, "But onni-chan, our grandma died a long time ago."

There was a pause. "When did she die?" Jounouchi finally asked.

"About a year ago. Remember she was killed by those thieving brats, Hansel and Gretel. Plus, they stole her treasures."

"Oh…Then I want you to deliver this basket of food to Yugi's grandpa."