Screams Part Four: Cause and Effect
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WARNING: This is a dark horror fan-fiction containing graphic violence, gore and major character deaths.
The following is the official Ministry transcript of the interview of Hermione Jane Granger:
Hermione Granger: ... everything was going fine. But then the fireplace blew all to hell...
Carl Llewellyn: (clearing throat) This is Auror Carl Llewellyn, on the fourteenth of June, 1999. This is an interview with a suspect regarding the Bulstrode incident. Let the record indicate that the interview is witnessed by Healer Majorette Borge and recorded using a standard Quoting Quill. (clearing throat) Please state your name.
Hermione Granger: Why don't you come over here and make me state my name.
Carl Llewellyn: Auror Shacklebolt identified you as being Hermione Granger. Are you she? Are you Hermione Granger?
Hermione Granger: If you knew my name, what'd you want me to state it?
Carl Llewellyn: Do not make this any harder on yourself than it already is. Answer the questions.
Hermione Granger: (unintelligible)
Carl Llewellyn: What was that?
Hermione Granger: I said 'You must feel like a big man, pushing the mudblood around'.
Carl Llewellyn: Let the record show that neither the interviewer nor the witness used such a degrading term and that the suspect has been treated with respect.
Hermione Granger: Bold as brass sitting there. How brave do you think you'd be if you got your willy cut off?
Carl Llewellyn: Are you threatening an Auror?
Hermione Granger: Yes, you fool, I'm threatening you! I'll watch you and your family die!'
Hermione Granger: (muffled sobbing)
Hermione Granger: I'm sorry... I didn't mean to say that. I get confused some time.
Hermione Granger: (laughter)
Hermione Granger: I meant about your family. You—you're a dead man. Your family will weep over what we'll do to you. You sons and daughters will have nightmares until they're old and gray. And your wife, well, maybe we'll send her a little something as a reminder of you; perhaps your toes. But we won't kill your family. Just you.
Majorette Borge: (startled gasp)
Hermione Granger: And you, Healer What's-Your-Name, I'll make you eat bits of this fool. The bits we won't send to his missus, that is. Don't think just because you're a witness means that you're safe from us. You're a fucking participant and therefore you will suffer. We'll make this imbecile be a meal for you.
Carl Llewellyn: Miss Granger, sit down!
Hermione Granger: Where's Harry?
Carl Llewellyn: Harry? Who's Harry?
Hermione Granger: Where's Harry?
Carl Llewellyn: Are you referring to Harry Potter?
Hermione Granger: Where's my beautiful Smiling Man?
Carl Llewellyn: Was he with you at Bulstrode's residence?
Hermione Granger: It's not right to keep him away from me.
Carl Llewellyn: Why is that?
Hermione Granger: I need him.
Carl Llewellyn: In what way do you need him? Does he protect you?
Hermione Granger: He needs me.
Carl Llewellyn: Was he at Millicent Bulstrode's house with you?
Hermione Granger: (crying)
Hermione Granger: It isn't right to keep us away from each other.
Carl Llewellyn: If you answer my questions, I'll do my best to help you.
Hermione Granger: (laughter)
Hermione Granger: You can't help me. Neither of you can. Well, you'll help me with your screams. I know your type, Auror. You'll scream, beg for mercy, and probably even try to offer us another victim to spare yourself. You people are always fun; 'Please let me go; I'll give you my wife.' But you, Healer, I wonder what will you do? Will you whimper? Or will you scream so loudly that my ears will hurt?
Carl Llewellyn: Let the record show that you have threatened both Healer Borge and myself twice now. Why do you feel the need to threaten us?
Hermione Granger: Are you mentally deficient? By keeping me here and asking me these asinine questions, you're the one forcing me from being with my Harry. And you ask me why I threaten you? Idiot!
Carl Llewellyn: So, in your mind, you are justified in your threats because you perceive us as separating you from Mr. Potter?
Hermione Granger: It's cause and effect. You keep us apart—that's the cause—and I'll watch as my Smiling Man snaps your bones—that's the effect.
Carl Llewellyn: Seeing how this line of questioning is going nowhere...
Hermione Granger: I'll be so cheery when you sob...
Carl Llewellyn: Let's get back on subject...
Hermione Granger: Perhaps we'll skin you. And then we could hang your carcass in the Ministry lobby...
Carl Llewellyn: What happened to Miss Millicent Bulstrode?
Hermione Granger: (soft laughter)
Hermione Granger: She screamed... a lot. Ah, lovely.
Carl Llewellyn: Did you have anything to do with her apparent murder?
Hermione Granger: Good grief, you are an idiot. How can it be only 'apparent' you dimwit? The bitch's entrails were strung about the house. Is there some natural cause that will make people expel their intestines that I don't know about?
Carl Llewellyn: So you're admitting to murdering Bulstrode?
Hermione Granger: I didn't touch her. I just gave my Harry some suggestions. You know, like driving an iron stake through the bottom of her foot.
Carl Llewellyn: You and Harry Potter killed Millicent Bulstrode?
Hermione Granger: We let her try to escape after that, strictly for entertainment. It was so funny to see her try to hobble away with a ten-inch spike jutting out of foot.
Carl Llewellyn: Let the record show that Miss Hermione Granger has just admitted to participating in the murder of Millicent Bulstrode.
Hermione Granger: And Cornelius Fudge.
Carl Llewellyn: Excuse me?
Hermione Granger: And Dolores Umbridge. Percy Weasley.
Majorette Borge Sweet Mother of God.
Hermione Granger: Sebastian Merrick. Carlie Marchbanks. Draco Malfoy. Oh, yes, Neville Longbottom as well. He was a very special one to us. Neville was our own Brutus.
Carl Llewellyn: You killed all those people?
Hermione Granger: There's a load others, too. I can list them if you want. But to be honest, I don't know if I can list them in order. Everything tends to get jumbled and mixed up in my noggin.
Carl Llewellyn: Um, just do your best.
Hermione Granger: Alright, this might take a while. We first started out with some Death Eaters. I didn't catch their names, but I can describe them if you like. The one who was the first to rape me; he didn't like eating his own genitals—the expression he made was priceless, but he didn't have a choice in the matter. After about three or four anonymous Death Eaters were used up, we moved onto Voldemort. I think one of the Lestranges, Rabastanor Rodolphus—don't really remember which one, came next. Or care either.
(loud knocking on door)
Carl Llewellyn: Come in. Oh, hello Kingsley. Let the record show that Aurors Kingsley Shacklebolt, Eddie Carmichael, and Paul Leach have entered the interview room.
Kingsley Shacklebolt: Release the suspect to my custody.
Carl Llewellyn: What? Why, Kingsley?
Kingsley Shacklebolt: I'm taking her to Hogwarts, Carl.
Carl Llewellyn: But that's not procedure.
Kingsley Shacklebolt: Granger's a special case.
Hermione Granger: (giggling)
Majorette Borge: Sir, the suspect has just admitted to aiding in the murder of several people. Including Fudge and Umbridge. We can't take her to Hogwarts. It's too dangerous.
Kingsley Shacklebolt: It'll be my responsibility, Healer Borge.
Carl Llewellyn: I'm agreeing to this under protest. This is against procedure.
Kingsley Shacklebolt: Noted.
Majorette Borge: Kingsley, the suspect made mention of Harry Potter being her accomplice. He may still be at the Bulstrode residence.
Kingsley Shacklebolt: Carmichael, you and Leach head back to the crime scene and look for any traces of Potter.
Eddie Carmichael: Are you serious? If he's there, he'd be dead for certain. The place is a disaster.
Kingsley Shacklebolt: Don't question me, Carmichael.
Eddie C Carmichael: Fine.
Kingsley Shacklebolt: Come with me, Hermione, I'm taking you to see Professor McGonagall.
Hermione Granger: I'll you soon, Carl. And then I'll pay you a visit afterwards, Healer.
(sound of a door closing)
Carl Llewellyn: End official interview.
It had been five days since the Granger interview and Majorette Borge couldn't stop shaking. An unknown wizard, most likely Potter, had killed the two Aurors who had been sent to the Bulstrode residence as well as several others at Hogwarts. A number of Aurors were injured and incapacitated in the processes. Granger and the wizard had escaped shortly after that.
What scared Majorette the most was that Auror Carl Llewellyn disappeared three days ago. Something told Majorette that Granger was holding true to her promise. That meant the Healer would be getting some unwelcome visitors soon.
She had spent the better part of a day setting up wards and traps around her house for protection. She had tried to get the Aurors to guard her, but because of the recent fiasco compounded with the loss of some many Aurors, they couldn't spare the personnel to help her. Thankfully, Majorette wasn't a slouch when it came to erecting wards. She had picked up a few tricks over the years. However, her wards did little good.
Majorette had sensed them before she could hear their approach. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up and she knew that the two were standing right behind her. She turned and saw Granger, smiling brightly, standing in front of a disfigured wizard in her kitchen.
"Here, I've brought you that meal I promised," Granger said, holding out a package. Majorette could see that the box was wet with some dark and sticky liquid. The distinct smell of death wafted from the box.
"P-please... don't. I didn't do anything. I was just doing my job," Majorette sobbed pathetically. "I didn't… I was… Please, I did nothing wrong. I don't deserve this."
"I've been over this; you did do something to 'deserve this'," Hermione said in a mocking tone. The fire in the witch's eyes terrified Majorette. "You and that idiotic Auror kept me away from my Harry with your inane questions. Cause and effect, remember? I know I explained it clearly enough for even you two to have followed. You do deserve this and more."
The Healer took two steps backwards, trying to put some distance between herself and her demented tormentors. Granger wobbled slightly forward, keeping the dripping box just in front of Majorette's face.
"Oh, and just in case you're wondering; Carl did scream. Quite a bit, in fact," Granger continued. Her voice became light and happy, as if talking about some fantastic party that Majorette had missed. "And I was right, of course. He did offer us his wife's life if we were to let him live. I told you he would that, didn't I?
"Anyway, it's time for your meal. First, might I suggest, you start out by munching on his ear," Granger said lightly as she took an uneasy step to the Healer. "Then you can sample his pancreas. I suppose that Carl's heart might be a bit difficult to eat, so we might fry it up for you first."
The deranged witch held the box under Majorette's nose and the Healer reeled back in fear and disgust. She could feel the heat of the still warm flesh in the package.
"If you don't eat it like I say, I'll be cross," Granger said in a singsong tone. "And if I'm cross, Harry will be upset. And if Harry's upset, you'll be screaming."
The disfigured wizard took a step forward as Granger pushed the box under Majorette's nose once more, pressing the wet package to the Healer's lips.
"Eat up," Granger half implored, half ordered. "But save some room for a special dessert."