A/N: Just a little something I found in my unfinished stories folder. Hope you like it, and I'm diligently working to get you more of 'I Shall Believe.' So here ya go with this…Seize the Day!
She was sitting on a bench before school, enjoying the sunny morning, but secretly waiting for someone to arrive. Scanning the crowded mass of students, she spotted the blonde; loose curls bouncing as she idly strode towards her destination. So enraptured by the sight before her she momentarily forgot what her original game plan was. Shaking out of her reverie, she stood up with purpose and swiftly made her way to intercept her.
Grabbing the blonde by the elbow she quickly steered her in the direction of the women's bathroom. After making sure it was empty, she locked the door and then turned to look at the blonde who was slightly stunned and amused at this turn of events.
"We need to talk."
"You just dragged me into an empty bathroom; I kind of figured you wanted something, Brooke."
"I can't do this anymore Peyton."
"Do what? What are you talking about?"
Taking a deep breath, trying to compose her self, Brooke leaned against a sink. Dropping her head she took in another breath before she looked Peyton directly in the eyes and spoke.
"This. You and Me. I can't stand it anymore, it has to end."
"Again, you need to clarify what exactly you are talking about because I seem to remember you slapping me across the face and then barely speaking to me for the past few months. So whatever it is you can't do, that somehow involves me, you need to spell it out for me."
Pacing the length of the bathroom, Peyton watched in concern and some amusement as Brooke kept frantically moving. Having some idea what the brunette was talking about, the blonde wasn't ready to give in just yet. Abruptly stopping in front of Peyton, Brooke looked at her for a moment before turning again and would have continued on in her nervous movement had the blonde not suddenly reached out and held her still, stopping her. Forcing the other girl to look at her, Peyton let out a frustrated breath.
"Damn it Brooke. Just tell me already, you're scaring me and your nervousness is making me nervous and I'm not even sure why."
Tears started to flow out of the brunette eyes as she broke down in Peyton's arms. All she had been holding in, all of the frustration, anger, fear, love, longing, jealousy, sorrow, pain, all of it coming out as she sobbed on the ground being held by the one person who ever truly cared for her.
"Shh, I've got you. You're okay, Brooke, I'm right here. Calm down, shh, just take deep breaths, I'm not going anywhere. Just talk to me okay, please Brooke; I don't know what it is. Please tell me you're okay."
Long minutes passed before either spoke again. Brooke's tears had stopped, Peyton had a few tear streaks along her face, but she too was no longer crying. Silent on the floor of the bathroom, the blonde soothingly rubbed the back of the brunette, wishing she knew what was wrong, desperately wanting to comfort her, still waging a war with her emotions for being shunned by the other girl for the past few months.
Sitting up and releasing herself from Peyton's grasp, Brooke whipped off her face and composed herself before she spoke.
"Considering that I pretty much just had a break down and I still need to talk to you, I was thinking maybe we just skip today and then we can talk or something. You in?"
"Sure, any place has got to be better than a public restroom, right?"
Leaving school wasn't much of a problem. The time spent in the locked restroom was enough so that first period had started and everyone was seemingly occupied. Plus they were seniors, and it is part of their duty being their last year of high school to skip once in a while. Whatever the case, no one was around to notice them leave and even if there was, no one would have given them much notice being it a Monday morning and not really caring.
The girls took Peyton's car, she drove – somewhat fast and in not necessarily the safest of ways possible – them to the beach where they stayed in the car and just watched the ocean from a distance.
Not being able to take the silence for much longer Peyton's curiosity got the better of her and she spoke.
"So…you ready to spill it yet or you just want to wait until you have it all worked out in your head?"
"I'm not ready yet. I just need some more time, maybe a little distraction so I don't over think. And I'm sorry but the beach is not going to be where I talk to you, because if this goes bad, then I'll never be able to come back here, and I really like the beach."
"Okay then, I'll think of something else. So you don't want to go some place where if I react badly you may never want to go there again? Which in turn would probably mean you wouldn't want to see me again, so my only conclusion is my house, how's that?"
"It'll do I guess."
Minutes later the girls were walking up the familiar stairs and into Peyton's room. Not having stepped foot in these walls for some time Brooke took a moment to look around. Things had changed, nothing too drastic, she thought, but there were definite alterations.
"You've changed some things."
"Yeah, well, after the whole Psycho-Derek thing I needed to erase all memories of that night. First I painted everything white. Then I painted some red and there was this big bulldog, and then real Derek helped me make it what it is today, with the red and black. It's not so different, but it is a little at the same time. Also most of the artwork I had up before is either gone or somewhere else, with the additions of a few new ones. So yeah, some things change with time I guess."
Peyton had been partially rambling due to her nervousness and was just trying to fill the silence that seemed to be threatening to ooze out from every corner. Sighing heavily she sat on her bed and looked up at Brooke shrugging then looked back down at her hands as they rested in her lap.
"I'm sorry I wasn't here then, when…I should have been here, there for you."
"I wish you were too, but we can't exactly change that now, so why dwell on it, right? It still gets to me sometimes, but I think for the most part, I'm back to my old self before the attack, or as close to it as I can get. But you've been good, right? Rachel's not making you sleep in the basement or anything?"
"No, she's not; she's been an okay friend."
More silence permeated the room. Peyton knew now that she had the brunette talking that she would probably bring up whatever it was that she had been dragged off into a secluded place for in the first place, but she wasn't sure, and she didn't want to bring it up and push either, so she remained silent until she could figure out what to say next.
"Brooke, are you alright?"
"No, not really. I regret so much Peyton, I hate feeling like this, knowing what I did to you, it hurts, that I hurt you."
"Except I hurt you first, when I knew better, when I promised I never would. And the karmic irony being it was all a massive mistake kills me even more. I deserved everything, all of it, I deserve so much worse."
"No Peyton, you don't. Do you know how much I wish I could take that day back, just to react differently or to say what I should have? I would give anything. None of this should have ever happened. If I wasn't such an idiot…"
"It's my fault Brooke. I told you I had feelings for your boyfriend, you reacted justly. Maybe the aftermath and how drawn out it has been was somewhat harsh, but I had it coming all the same. Knowing what I know now, I'm the idiot, really."
Silence fell again, each soaking up what the other had said. Sitting side by side on the bed, Brooke reached over to take Peyton's hand into hers, cradling it as if it were the most precious thing in the world.
"I've missed you. So much. I need you back in my life P. Sawyer. Can you ever forgive me?"
"If you can do something for me?"
"Can you forgive me?"
"Of course, I did a long time ago, I just couldn't bring myself to talk to you, I let it get away from me."
"I forgive you too, there was never any question."
More silence, followed by, wait for it…silence.
"Wait, you said something about irony and a massive mistake, and then knowing what you know now, what's that all about?"
"Just that when I told you I had feelings for Luke, while at the time I thought that was what I was feeling, I later found out I was wrong. That's not what I was feeling, not for him anyway. There was a whole lot of confusion going on. And I figured a lot of stuff out since then, even though you see us hanging around all the time, there's nothing there but friendship. He doesn't know the whole deal, but I think he sees it now too."
"Oh…Um, part of the reason why I yanked you into the restroom, I kind had a revelation or two of my own, and well, we both apparently reacted badly for the wrong reasons. I know now why I did what I did, but it wasn't because I loved Lucas, I was jealous, because I…I…"
"Brooke, just tell me, please."
"I didn't want to lose you. And not just in the friendship way, I didn't want him to have you, because…damn it. Peyton, I like you, like, in the gay way."
Being as it was during the day no crickets could be heard but I'm sure if a pin were to drop in that moment it would have been heard.
"Okay, before you freak out, I'm sorry but I had to tell you. It's been eating away at me and I at least needed you to know. I hope we can at least get our friendship back on track, please, don't hate me for this Peyt, I don't know what I'd do if I truly lost you."
"Brooke, you're rambling. I really, really like you too. I have a feeling, this, between you and me, is why everything went to hell. You see, we were both idiots, neither of us knew what we really wanted, and we couldn't even admit it if we did."
"So, really? Wait, really, really?"
"I. Am. In. Love. With. You. Is that clear enough for you?"
"God yes. Me too, so, so much."
"So what does this mean for us? Where do we go from here?"
"I think seeing as how we just made up and now we know we each have it bad for the other, that we should take this slow, like maybe not rush, but I so want to kiss you right now and that's all I can really think about."
"Then kiss me, Brooke."
And then she did.