this is the last part of lights and sounds. i kno some of you were getting annoyed (who wouldn't?) but let's just see how it all turns out. thanks for the reviews.

CHAPTER ONE: hey jane

winter

Alex leaned back in her chair, gazing out the window of her huge corner office. In the three years she had been working as a band manager she had managed to scramble her way up the corporate ladder and had made it to the top. She was second only to the owner, Bill Regis, and as of late, most of what she did was sign bands to their label, Remix. But what she really loved about the job was making the connection with the band, seeing them live, traveling with them. So, every month or so she picked a certain band and went on a couple spots with them. Spots being the concert, press conferences, sound checks, and everything else that was part if being in a band. She loved it.

She leaned her chair forward and stood up, stretching her arms over her head. Outside, lights flickered on and off everywhere. New York City. Alex loved living there, mainly because it was so different from anywhere else she had lived. The city was alive every second of every day, even now, at three in the morning. She couldn't get enough of it. Alex was startled from her musing when the phone on her desk rang. She picked it up and pressed two."Yes?" she asked, rather professionally if she said so herself.

"Ms. Kelly, call for you on line seven." Alex's secretary told her. Alex frowned. Who would call her this late? Rachel and the rest of her friends would just call her cell and it was too late for any of her clients. But then again, with angry bands rejected from the label, you never knew who would drunk dial her.

"Who is it?" Alex asked. Her secretary paused.

"Let me ask." The phone clicked and Alex sat down in her chair, distracted again by the lights outside, the phone almost forgotten. When she and Rachel had moved to the city, Rachel had quit being Alex's secretary and personal assistant and had instead finished law school. Now, Rachel was an ADA for the city. Alex was so proud of her girfriend. She heard the phone click again. "Ms. Kelly?" Her secretary asked. Alex pulled the phone back up to her ear.

"Yeah?" Alex answered in a question. She propped her feet up on her desk and crossed her ankles, leaning back in her chair.

"She says her name is Marissa Cooper." Alex's feet hit the ground with a thump.

Marissa sat in her pitch black bedroom, her fingers picking at her covers. Cars headlights passed by, trailing a stream of light. Marissa was lost. She was just lost and dazed and confused and so in her mind that she was out of it. She felt like thousands upon thousands of thoughts were swirling through her head, too quickly to catch on to, but not so quickly that she could ignore them. But it also seemed like around all these thoughts was a fuzzy blanket that dulled her senses and made it impossible to think. She stood up slowly and walked to the window, looking out onto the street, trying to get a handle on her emotions.

After a while she walked away again, going wherever her feet took her. She ended up standing at the doorway to her daughter's room. She didn't going inside, merely stood there, looking at her daughter's bed and things. She felt empty. After a while she turned away again and went to the kitchen. It was about 3 in the morning, but she flicked on the kitchen light anyway. She sat down on a bar stool in front of her cell phone. She wanted to talk to someone, but she had no idea who. Not Summer, not Seth, not Anna, not anyone she really knew. She could barely remember her own name. She just couldn't grasp onto her thoughts. Finally, one flew out at her. Alex Kelly. The one person who Marissa would trust with her life, with her soul, but not with her heart. Marissa stared at her phone for a moment, then ever so slowly picked it up and went through her contacts. There, almost at the top of the list was Alex's work number. Marissa didn't believe that Alex would be there, but it gave her something, anything, to do. She pushed call and listened as the phone rang.

"Hello?" Alex asked, her voice much more nervous and frustrated than she had meant.

"Alex?" Marissa asked, her voice soft and questioning. At the sound of Marissa's voice Alex sank back into her chair. Oh god, she had forgotten how much she loved Marissa Cooper. It rushed over her like a wave. She had moved on, blocked her thoughts of the younger girl, but the feelings were still there, as strong as ever. Alex's heart was racing, as well as her mind. She could feel the other girl through the phone, hear her breath, her voice, and Alex didn't ever want to hang up, didn't want to lose Marissa again.

"Marissa." Alex said, not sure what to say.

"Yeah." There was a long pause. Alex went past her old emotions and grew frustrated. She had finally moved on and here was Marissa, trying to ruin her life all over again.

"Can I help you?" Alex asked, her anger creeping into her voice. Marissa paused. Maybe calling Alex hadn't been the best idea, but it was the only one she had had. The only person who seemed like they could help. God, Marissa felt like she was out of her mind.

"I just. . ." Marissa trailed off, struggling to put into words what she was feeling, what she knew.

"Wanted to call you and ruin your life again?" Alex asked angrily. "At 3 in the morning?" Marissa was shocked into silence by the anger evident in Alex's voice. She didn't know what she had expected when she had called Alex, but it hadn't been this. She couldn't deal with this.

"No, I-" Marissa started, but Alex cut her off.

"What, you don't like Ryan anymore and now you want me?" Alex continued. She was pissed. She loved this girl with every inch of herself, and Marissa didn't feel the same way.

"No, Alex-" But Alex cut her off again.

"What do you want Marissa?" Alex put her head in her hand.

"Alex, please listen. I'm trying to tell you." Marissa's voice was strained and rough and made Alex pause. Something was wrong. Something had to be wrong, why else would Marissa be calling her? Slowly, she realized that Marissa had no interest with getting back together with her. She just had to tell her something.

"Marissa?" All the anger had left Alex's voice. "What's wrong?" Marissa paused again, this time at the tenderness in Alex's voice. She finally found her voice, broken and fumbling as it was.

"Alex. Alex, he's dead. Ryan's dead. He's gone Alex."