Disclaimer: All characters are property of Rumiko Takahashi, not I
It wasn't until the early morning hours that Rin finally fell asleep. Pure exhaustion took its toll on her and forced her to sleep. She dreamt of him; the demon. When she woke the dreams were still fresh in her mind.
The dream was of the demon standing proudly on a mountain top. The white tendrils of his hair flowed like water in the wind. Everything about him was fluid. He was so regal and proud. He was missing an arm, how do I know that? She searched her mind for a reason for her knowledge. Maybe she had imagined it.
She sat up, pulling her knees against her chest and resting her chin on her knee. She retraced the path that he had touched on her face once more. He wasn't attacking me was he? He could have killed me if he wanted to but that wasn't what he wanted. He looked so sad, so lonely. She sighed away the thoughts and questions that bombarded her mind. It doesn't matter does it? I'm getting married …. someday …. and I love Kanaye.
The day dragged on as they traveled. She watched the countryside roll by from the small window in the wagon she rode in. Everything reminded her of the demon man; the sun reminded her of his eyes, the stream they passed reminded her of his hair, the falling cherry blossoms of his skin.
The troop stopped and made camp at dusk, they wouldn't reach the next village till late the next day so they were going to camp for the night. Rin was excited about the idea of sleeping out doors and was horribly disappointed when she was informed that she would sleep in the wagon.
Rin was quiet most of the night, having some mindless conversation with Kanaye and some of the troops. The moon tormented her, calling to her, telling her to leave, to run to it. She wanted to go; she wanted to see the demon again. Her desire unnerved her, how could she desire someone so much who she didn't know when the man she loved was there with her.
"Because you do know him." Her soul spoke to her from the recesses of her mind.
The night was uneventful and she retired early, stating a headache as her reasons. Kanaye hugged her and saw her to her wagon. As he turned to leave something in the distance caught her eye. Could it really be him? The figure was faint and distant, not more than a blur of pure white bathed in moon light. She smiled to herself before making her way to her bed and falling asleep.
Again Rin dreamt of the demon man. This time he was nothing more than a blur of colors and feelings. She couldn't remember his face or his touch anymore. She awoke startled, how could she be forgetting so fast? It was like the night before had only been a dream.
Sesshomaru watched the witches every move. Nothing during the day had seemed out of the ordinary, but he was certain that she had something to do with Rin's loss of memory. He would have just grabbed Rin and taken her back with him if it had not been for how happy she looked there, among her own people. He also remembered how badly it hurt Kohaku so long ago when he regained his memories.
Maybe its better that she forget, he thought to himself. She had seen so many horrible things in her short life. Forgetting would be like a new beginning for her; a chance to be happy.
When he had pulled her cold dead body back from hell that was what he had thought wasn't it. That he should have left her in a village long ago, that he should have never taken her with him. He couldn't leave her then, his impact on her life had been too great and leaving her would have broken her, but now…
As the sun filtered into the morning sky he finally saw what he was looking for: the witch was making tea and had it delivered to Rin's wagon. She's using the tea to suppress her memory, and her scent. He growled to himself and considered his next move.
The day dragged on the same as the one before. Today they made it to a village so they could sleep in an inn, that Rin was grateful for since it had been raining all day. She felt so isolated sleeping alone in the wagon while everyone else slept outside under the moon; her precious moon.
Once the sun went down she snuck away and went for a walk on her own in the woods outside of the village. Part or her hoped to run into the demon again and an equal part hoped not to. She
When a couple of hours had past and she still hadn't seen him, she returned to the inn, disappointed.
She had changed for bed and was securing her hair in a tight bun when a feeling creped inside of her. Her curiosity grew, forcing her to the window. The figure was faint and distant, but it was there she was certain it was him.
She didn't bother to change or put on shoes; she just ran. She ran through the village and out into the surrounding fields of produce. The cold soil stung her bare feet and the few drops of rain that fell burned her skin as they whipped past her. She ran until her lungs burned and her heart felt like it was going to explode; it could have exploded and she would have kept running. Something inside of her forced her forward, forced her to keep running. The closer she got the clearer his figure became, knowing it was him kept her moving despite her body crying for her to stop.
She didn't understand why she was reacting this way. She didn't know this demon. He was a demon, he could be enchanting her, but no, that wasn't it. She did know him, deep, deep within her, she knew him.
By the time she reached him her clothes were wet and her muscles were convulsing from the combination of cold and exhaustion. She paused for a moment, then, satisfied that it really was him she hurled herself into his embrace. His armor cut her face but she hardly noticed; her body desperately needed him. Her actions were completely instinctual, 'just feel' her heart told her.
He scooped her up in his arm and carried her to a nearby tree where they would be safe from the rain. He pushed her away just long enough to unhook his armor and let it fall to the ground with a clank, before taking her back in his embrace and pulling her to the ground with him. He sat with his back to the trunk of the tree and her between his legs.
It was cold and her clothes were wet, she furiously fought the ties on his shirt, desperately seeking heat; his heat. He peeled the wet night clothes off of her and wrapped her naked body in is mokomoko-sama (the fluffy). She was surprised by the amount of heat the fur offered, it was warm and comforting. She wrapped her arms around him, burying them under his shirt, letting her fingers linger on the warm flesh of his chest all the way around to his back. She rested her head on his chest, and satisfied with their position, closed her eyes and relaxed her body.
He reached his hand around her face and caressed her cheekbone with his claw before finding his way to the bun in her hair and cutting it out. Her hair cascaded over her shoulders and down to the small of her back. He buried his hand in her hair and held on tight.
Sesshomaru had never before held Rin like this. He had wanted to, but more so he wanted her to want him to. Their relationship was so … undefined. She had always just been there, never asking for anything, never wanting anything more than to just be in his presence. Now she was asking, and he would give.
They sat silently for what may have been hours or weeks. Time became a theory instead of a fact. They had no need for words; their souls spoke to one another in a silent language that only they shared. Her heart told stories of her past and of the man in her arms that her mind struggled to understand. She tried desperately to remember him. She begged her mind and dammed it for forgetting.
Sleep pulled at her. She desperately fought back; she was afraid to sleep. She was afraid to wake up only to find this had been a dream. She was more afraid of waking up with no memory of this, or of him. Her exhaustion eventually won, and the darkness of sleep tackled her mind.
From her room in the inn the witch heard the girls door fly open and heard her run across the wooden floors of the establishment. She followed the girl and watched her run out into the night. Her eyes grew wide with a mixture of shock and satisfaction as she watched the girl hurl herself into the arms of the distant figure clad in white.
"So you found her Lord Sesshomaru. The gods are smiling, I certainly am fortunate." The witch said to herself in the night. Her plan was working out better than she had ever expected. With a smirk and a satisfied laugh she headed back to the inn.
When Rin woke to the knock on the door she was disappointed to realize that she was in her room at the inn. She sighed and shook the tears back at the realization that it had only been a dream.
'Knock knock' the sound shook her out of her thoughts. She started to get up and quickly realized she was naked and wrapped in soft, warm white fur. "It wasn't a dream!" she whispered to herself and she buried her face in the fur reveling in its warmth and comfort.
"Your tea my Lady." Kanaye's voice shattered the feeling of satisfaction she was reveling in.
"Hold on!" she choked out as she scrambled to her feet and quickly got dressed in the first thing she grabbed. She hid the fur in the traveling trunk she had been loaned, she squared herself off in the mirror and coving the cut on her face with her hair.
"Ok" she opened the door and let Kanaye in. He put down the tea before taking her in his arms and kissing her on the cheek. She offered him the cheek that didn't have a cut so he wouldn't see it. Ok ok its ok everything is ok. I didn't do anything wrong right? I shouldn't be worried. Well, maybe spending the night naked in the arms of a demon could be considered 'wrong', but I didn't really DO anything. Oh what does it matter its not like we are married … yet. Oh crap….. she silenced her mind. Kanaye had been talking to her while she let her mind ramble on, and he had asked her a question; she had no idea what he asked.
"huh?" she asked nervously.
"Amaya you seem really distracted, is everything ok?" he gently smoothed her bangs and tucked her hair behind her ears. He looked at her with a puzzled expression before running his finger along the scrape on the side of her face. "What happened?"
It was the gentle way he voiced his concern that made her stomach turn as the thought of the most convincing lie. "What? Oh!" she turned to the mirror that hung on the wall, "Oh, I must have scratched myself in my sleep." It wasn't even a good lie.
"Uh-huh ok…" he allowed. She knew he wasn't convinced. "Uh… well…Oh yah! said she need to see you as soon as your awake. I have to go take care of some business in the village, join me when you're done?"
"Of course of course! Ill see you later then." She kissed him on the cheek while gently nudging him toward the door. She closed the door behind him and let her head fall against the door before breathing a sigh of relief.
She dressed quickly. She decided to wear her hair down today, for the first time since she had 'woken up'. She opened the trunk and ran her hand over the white fur before heading off to find
"Keep the young Lord here until night fall, don't let him come after us, busy him how ever you need to. After night fall tell him that the girl was spotted the night before with a demon and there was word that the demon was following us. These orders come from the Lord so make sure they are followed, understood?" the witched tapped her fingernails on her arm as she issued her ordered to the head of the troops that had accompanied them on their journey.
"Understood." The officer replied. "Lady Amaya," he bowed his head and beckoned the girl to head into the room with the witch.
"Oh Lady Amaya, good morning! I have great news My Lady, there has been word of a family who might know of your identity a days ride from here. The Lord has ordered the troops and his son to meet him tomorrow here so….."
"We can't go?" Rin said dropping her head.
"Oh child, don't look so sad. I'll talk to Kanaye and the troops and see if we will be missed. Ill take you to the village and we can see if there is any truth to the rumors ok." The witch lifted Amaya's head and firmly pinched her cheek forcing a little smile.
Rin stood up and smiled as she headed back to her room to gather her things and prepare for the days ride ahead of her.
They arrived at the secluded village slightly before sunset. The village was small and only had enough crops to support itself. It was well protected by a perimeter wall. Rin thought it a little odd for a village so small with no obvious trade products to be so secure. The witch told Rin to wait at the gate of the village while she rode in and made sure all was well.
It was almost half an hour before the witch retuned and lead Rin through the gate. A beautiful woman with jet black hair greeted her with a kind smile and helped her off of her horse. She noticed a man with long silver hair skinning a dear with his bare hands, if it hadn't been for the ears on his head she would have thought he was the demon that had visited her. The rest of the village was quiet.
"Hi, my name is Kagome, nice to meet you." The black haired woman was so kind and her words were so sincere. "We would like you to stay with us at least for the night, if you don't mind."
When she finished speaking the man with the dear stood up and walked over to her wiping the blood off of his hands. His eyes made her gasp sharply. They were amber just like the demon's, they startled her but she found an odd sense of comfort looking into them. He greeted her with a simple nod of the head before heading into the hut.
Kagome led Rin into the home where they were greeted by two jumping children. They were obviously twins, one boy and one girl. Both had white ears like their father and black hair like their mother. They each had one brown eye and one gold eye. Their laughter was addictive and Rin couldn't help but to laugh as she played with them as their parents prepared dinner.
Inuyasha was busy skinning and cleaning the deer he had caught earlier that day when he heard the sound of horse hooves in the distance. "Strangers" he stated to his wife as he lifted his nose into the air. He was on guard and stood with his arms across his chest and a scowl on his face as the woman entered the village.
"You must be Inuyasha, Sesshomaru's younger brother?" the woman addressed him directly without ever sparing a glace to Kagome or Shippo who stood only a few feet away from him. Her voice was pleasant enough and he didn't smell any hostility on her, but she still, made him feel uneasy.
"Yah, half-brother, what about it?"
"Well sir, you see, me and my Lord came across a young woman who had been injured lying in a forest alone. She has no memory to speak of. A man in a near by village told us that she may be Lord Sesshomaru's charge."
"Oh Rin?" Shippo interrupted
Inuyasha shot him a glance forcing him silent.
The woman continued, "The man didn't know her name. Anyway, the man said that I might find Sesshomaru's brother in this village and that you might be able to recognize the girl and take her off of our hands if she really is his charge."
Inuyasha looked at the woman, obviously not content with her story. He smelt Sesshomaru, but it was faint. He wanted to smell her better. The other thing that concerned him was the fact that Rin; since she had entered puberty had radiated a demonic aura that was the same as his brothers. It had been years since he had seen her last so he decided that maybe something had changed; he rationalized to himself.
"Maybe we should see her, we know her well; we can tell her who she really is" Kagome broke the uncomfortable silence between the woman and her husband.
"No, No!" the woman insisted. "We fear that if her memories are restored suddenly she will suffer from the trauma. And because we don't know how she got in the state she was in when we discovered her, we think it best that her memories return in their own time." The woman sniffled a little and wiped fake tears away from her eyes with the sleves of her kimono, "When we found her she had been ravaged and beaten badly; she had claw marks and bites all over her body."
"Yanno," Kagome said rubbing her chin, "I've heard of things like that happening to people with amnesia. Bring her in you can stay with us tonight and we will see what we can do." She purposely skimmed over the other part of the woman's story and her obvious insinuation. She knew that Sesshomaru -despite the fact that he was a total bastard- would never, in a million years, do anything like that to Rin.
Inuyasha grunted as the woman secured her horse and headed back to the gates of the village to lead the girl in. He didn't believe the woman's story, but he kept quiet and let his wife accommodate them. At least if Rin was with them she was safe enough and he knew where ever Rin was, his brother was close behind.
Kagome hurried to get Sango and Miroku and tell them the story before Rin got there, just incase they slipped up and said something. Also she had a bad feeling about the woman and her story and wanted their opinions.
Rin had grown a lot from the lanky teenager she was the last time they had all seen her. Now she had filled out a lot and was more muscular. Her body looked a little different, but all in attendance were certain that it was really Rin.
After a short exchange Kagome led the Rin and the woman into the house. Inuyasha took the opportunity to confer with Sango and Miroku.
"So, What do you think?"
"She doesn't feel like Rin." Miroku remarked in reference to the slight aura she possessed. He and Kagome had been the first to notice it when she was about 13. Sesshomaru had brought her to stay with them when she had her first "womanly cycle". Sango and Kagome took the week to stay with her and explain things, she would visit with the women often after that and confer with them on all matters "woman". During that visit when they noticed the aura they had taken the girl to see Kaede who sensed it too and came to the conclusion that it must be because of her constant contact with a particular demon. The subject was left at that.
"Hmph, she don't smell like Rin. But I can smell Sesshomaru all over her, its faint though." Inuyahsa genuinely did not trust the situation, but in the end he decided to wait for Sesshomaru's inevitable arrival.
It wasn't until the early morning hours that he finally sensed his brother's presence. He heisted for a moment considering whether or not to take Tessaiga. It had been years since he had need for the sword, but who knows when Sesshomaru is in town. Finally he decided against it; he knew that in all matters Rin, Sesshomaru would be civil. He found his brother perched on the only hill top that could see over the gates of the village.
It had taken Sesshomaru longer than expected to reach the village because he had to stop and wait for Jaken and Ah-Un to catch up. He was extremely annoyed with the delay, but he knew that if Rin was with his brother that she was safe for the time being. He also hoped that seeing him and their friends that some of her memories might return.
Just as the sun began to chase away the darkness of night his brother came bounding up the hill where he waited and perched himself, in a very dog-like fashion, on a nearby rock. He knew he didn't have to go into the village to call his brother, he would know he was there.
The brothers looked into the horizon for a moment before Sesshomaru broke the silence. "I trust she is safe. The woman with her is a witch and is doing something to ensure her memories do not return. In the morning, do not let her drink the tea the woman offers her." that was the gist of it, there was no need for further conversation.
He knew he would not be so lucky, Inuyahsa had other ideas about what their conversation should consist of. "The woman told us Rin's getting married, to the son of a Lord. She is human yanno, they don't live forever. Humans her age are married and have pups by now. You can't just keep her forever!" Inuyasha's glare was pointed and filled with accusations.
Sesshomaru had no need to explain himself or his relationship with anyone, especially his half brother. The Lord of the West did not have to answer the accusations of a simple villager. He gave his brother a quick glance and grunted his disapproval over the way he was speaking to a superior. "Just do not let her drink the tea." He allowed before turning back to Jaken who was currently struggling with a very disobedient two-headed dragon.
It would be another few moments before Inuyasha shook his head in a very disapproving manner and bound back to the village, leaving the gates open for Sesshomaru.
The reason his brother's words had bothered him so much was because he had also thought as much. It had been time years ago to let Rin live among her people, but she had no desire to and he didn't have the heart to force her.
She had looked happy in the arms of the human man she was betrothed to. She had smiled at him, anyone else would have thought she was the happiest woman in the world; but Sesshomaru knew different. When she was smiling at the young man there was certain magnitude missing in her smile. He told himself that her smile, her real smile, was reserved for only him. That idea made him smile.
His idiot half-brother would never understand the complexities of his relationship with Rin. Neither would most of the world, he knew that and had come to grips it long ago. At times he didn't understand it himself. Somehow she had slipped herself into his heart with her smile and laugh. His position in her life had changed so many times, but he always had a position; and that he was grateful for.
But now, where would she put him now?
Akiko woke up shortly after Inuyasha left the house. She was excited to see that he had so carelessly left the sword of her salvation unguarded, simply leaning against the wall in his bed room. She quickly took the sword and hid it among her things before preparing her morning tea.
She was running as fast as she could. She was so scarred. The wolves were faster than her and they nipped at her feet, teasing her before they killed her. When they inevitably caught her they tore at her flesh. It only hurt for a moment, she quickly lost all sensation in her body and her mind did it's instinctual duty of protecting her by shutting down.
It was dark and cold wherever she was. There was absolutely no light and she was alone. She felt small, weak and helpless in the darkness. Sadness and fear consumed her she wanted to cry but couldn't, she had no body to produce tears. Her soul was burning and tearing.
Something shined in the darkness, a solitary light. It grew until it consumed her, pulling her out of the darkness. She felt the strong arm wrapped around her small weak body, and when she was sure it was safe, she opened her eyes. It was him, he had pulled her out of the darkness. She smiled, not with her face or heart, but with her soul. The simple smile was her soul's way of thanking him for saving her and in turn attempting to save him.
The name was nothing more than a whisper that came out of the recesses of her unconscious mind.
It was the whispering of the name that woke her up from the disturbing dream. Sesshomaru she thought to herself. The name felt right, but when she tried to convert it to words it got stuck on the back of her tongue.
She got dressed and secured her hair slowly, her thoughts were still lingering on the dream. It was so real, when she woke up she had been weeping, her face was soaked with tears like she had been crying hard and a lot. She wiped away the bags under her eyes and forced a smile.
She hesitantly joined Kagome, Inuyasha, and Akiko for breakfast. Akiko reached for the tea pot to poor her a cup of tea when Inuyasha stepped on the small ceramic tea pot. His actions were obviously intentional and intended to annoy the witch. He allowed a very insincere "Opps" before sitting back down and eating his breakfast. Rin caught the wink he shot to his wife over the top of his rice bowl.
Half way through the meal Inuyasha sat up very straight, his ears turned back, his eyes narrowed, and he sniffed the air. Kagome's eyes met Rin's and gave her a look of concern. The only person in attendance who looked calm was the witch.
"Demon!" A man's scream broke through the uncomfortable silence of the morning.
Inuyasha was the first out the door, in no more than a flash of red and silver he was at his brother's side. Kagome was next staring in horror at the scene. Rin followed but the witched stopped her as she reached the door. The witch ran her hand over Rin's hair before whispering in her ear "Take the sword."
Rin hesitated and gave the woman a worried glance.
"The demon, the demon in white, he is the demon who killed your family, he is the demon who did this to you." She placed the hilt of an old rusty sword in Rin's hand. Rin hardly noticed the swords presence and she joined the rest of the onlookers at the door of the hut.
"Kanaye" she had meant to scream but the name was only a quiet mumble. Kagome heard it and shot a quick glance at Rin. She would have seen the sword in her hand had it not been for the escalation of the scene in front of them.
"Amaya! Fear not, love, for I will sleigh this demon in your name! For your love!" Kanaye yelled looking right at Rin
"Amaya?" the audience repeated.
Kanaye lifted his sword above his head and ran toward Sesshomaru ready to deliver his first strike. In a flash of light Sesshomaru met the man half way. He caught the young human by his throat and lifted him off the ground with ease. His eyes dug into the man's soul.
Rin watched in horror as Kanaye, the man she loved, grabbed the demon's wrists and struggled to free himself. He kicked his legs pointlessly as the oxygen to his brain was slowly being cut off. An overwhelming need to protect the human welled up inside of Rin. The sword in her hand began to pulse; her attention, as well as all in attendance, with the exception of the demon, turned to Rin and the sword.
"Shit!" Inuyasha yelled as the sword grew to its more impressive fighting state. He instinctively reached down to where the sword should be, knowing that it was no longer there.
"SESSHOMARU!" she screamed his name, she didn't even know if it was his name, but she screamed it anyway.
His attention turned from the now limp man in his hand to the girl holding the sword. He discarded the man, hurling his limp body into a nearby hut.
Rin watched through her peripheral vision as Sango and Miroku ran out of their hut, the one Kanaye's body had hit, and checked his status. "He is breathing!" Sango confirmed before joining the party of onlookers which included Kagome, Shippo and Jaken.
Satisfied that Kanaye was safe for the moment, she heaved the sword over her head and brought it down hard, on Sesshomaru's chest. He didn't even flinch as the sword cut through his armor and blood stained his white top. He kicked the damaged armor to the side and took a step closer to Rin.
He's not afraid she thought to herself as she lifted the sword again.
"RIN PLEASE STOP!" Kagome screamed as she grabbed the back of her husband's shirt and watched in horror, waiting for the next strike.
"Rin?" she repeated out loud to herself, the name hit her mind like a wave against a wall.
"Rin." Sesshomaru repeated looking deep into her. Another wave hit the dam in her mind.
She brought the sword down to her side and let it slip out of her hand before falling her to knees. "I'm Rin." The dam in her mind finally broke and memories and emotions barreled over her. It took her awhile to process all the information that flooded her mind.
Her family being killed, her being killed, going to hell twice, she remembered everything. Sesshomaru saving her, his strong arms pulling her away from death. Picking flowers and singing silly songs to Jaken. Training, day and night, long and hard, so that she wouldn't be worthless, so that her lord would not think her weak. Everything, every moment of her life that lead back to Sesshomaru bared down on her like a tidal wave crashing inside of her skull.
As Rin struggled on her knees to process all the information the witch took her opportunity to retreat. The rest of the crowed was too concerned with Rin to pay her any heed.
Inuyasha and Kagome ran to Rin; Inuyasha reclaimed his sword and Kagome put her arm around the girl and tried to offer her some measure of comfort. Inuyasha allowed Kagome to continue her attempts for a moment before taking her back to the group of observers where she belonged.
Rin scooped up a few pieced of the broke armor in her trembling hands. Horrified she looked up at Sesshomaru, the tears welled up in her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. "I'm sorry, so sorry. Please forgive me Lord Sesshomaru." Her voice was shaky and uneven. She willed him to understand; she wasn't just apologizing for the broken armor, she was pleading forgiveness for forgetting about him.
AN Sorry about the cliffy yo, but this is as far as ive written. Ill try to finish but it might be a minute because of my other stories.