The Start Of It All
A/N: Jake comes in the story in a big way eventually, this is kind of an introduction.
School had just gotten out two weeks ago and Lilly and I decided to celebrate by going shopping. I was in the dressing room of Macy's trying on a pair of size two Lucky Brand jeans. It was a tight pull over my thighs, I had to hop and wiggle to get into them. When I tried to button them, it wouldn't budge. This had happened earlier with a skirt I had tried on at home.
"Shit," I muttered. This was embarrassing. Did I gain weight? Oh god. This wouldn't be good for Hannah.
"How do they look, Miles?" Lilly's voice called through the dressing room.
"I don't know, I don't really like the shade…" I told her, not wanting to say the real reason. Lilly wouldn't care, but it was still embarrassing for me. The jeans were skintight. "How do yours look?"
"Really good, I think I'm going to buy them. I'll meet you by the register." Lilly said, then I heard her door open and she walked out. I took off the jeans and stood in front of the mirror in my panties.
Did I have cottage cheese thighs?
What about flabby arms? I need to loose these pounds I've gained, and
When we went to the food court before going home that day, Lilly ate pizza and I didn't eat anything. When she asked me why I wasn't eating, I told her I had a huge breakfast and wasn't hungry. Thankfully, she
accepted my answer. Later that day I was sitting in my room, bored with
nothing to do. I decided now was a better time than ever to take a run. Plus, it wasn't like I had anything else to do. I went in my closet and pulled out some gym shorts and a tee shirt and threw them on.
"Dad, I'm going on a run." I told him as I walked out the back door.
"You? You my daughter, are going on a run?!" He pretended to act amazed. I ignored him. "Better be back for dinner!" He called after me. I waved at him then left.
I ran two miles in total when I finally came back to my house. With my hands on my knees, I was bent over wheezing. I am definitely NOT a runner. I've always hated running, but what works works, right?
"Hey Bud, that was a long run, but you're just in time for dinner!" He motioned for me to sit down at the spot at the dinner table across from Jackson. I sat down and dad brought over three plates of lasagna, my
favorite. I hesitantly looked at it.
"Miley! Miley! Eat me! Eat me!" It was calling my name. I guess I could eat dinner. I hadn't eaten anything since breakfast and I was starving. Also,
with that run I probably would have run off anything I ate. I dug into the delicious meal.
"Jeez, Miles slow down, your going to get a stomach ache!" Dad exclaimed.
"Sorry, just hungry." I smiled sheepishly and finished the meal. I scooted away from the table and put my dish in the sink.
"Jackson, your on dishes tonight." Dad told my brother.
"What? I ALWAYS do the dishes! Make Miley!" He complained.
"No, dufuss, I always do them. And I did them last night, it's your turn." I smirked then walked up to my room. I laid on my bed with my laptop, but immediately felt guilty for eating that meal. What was there to do about it? I couldn't go on another run, I'm too tired and it's dark out.
I walked into the bathroom and looked in the mirror.
Gross! Do I have two chins!? That's disgusting. I'm disgusting. I looked around my bathroom then grabbed my toothbrush out of its stand next to Jackson's. I walked over to the toilet and kneeled down and held onto the bowl with one hand, putting the end of the toothbrush in my mouth with the other hand.
Was I really going to do this?
I knew this could be dangerous, but was there any other way?
I have to do this, my career depends on it.
Here I go… Shoving the toothbrush down my throat, it hit my tonsils, making me gag. Before I could do anything else I threw the toothbrush on the ground and slammed the toilet lid shut.
Oh my god, how could I have almost done that? I'm not a sick person. I'm not going to make myself throw up!
What was I thinking? I know all the risks. I could become addicted! The acid from my stomach could make a hole in my esophagus! Gross. Plus it could mess up my nails!
I hurried out of the bathroom and went across the hallway back to my room. I got under my covers, grabbed my laptop and signed online. Hopefully I could talk online with someone to distract me.
SmileMile86 is now logged in.
I scanned my buddy list with my eyes. Oliver was on.
SmokinOken: Hey Miles
SmileMile86: Hey Ollie
SmokinOken: How was shopping today?
SmileMile86: It was great. You should've come!
SmokinOken: Oh yeah, shopping, MY FAV!
SmileMile86: haha, well next time we'll do something you would like too.
SmokinOken: Sorry, mom's calling me. ttyl
No one else that I wanted to talk to was online so I signed off and picked up my favorite book of all time, This Lullaby, and decided to read it again. Remy and Dexter were just so cute together! I reread all the parts I loved and skipped over the boring ones, then went to bed early.
The next morning, I woke up around eight and walked down stairs. Dad was making pancakes.
"Mornin' Miley." He greeted me as I walked into the kitchen.
"Morning daddy." I said, sitting on one of the counter stools. Yum, those pancakes smelled delicious. Knowing I never turned down his pancakes, dad handed me a stack of three on a plate with a few strawberries.
"Thanks," I said, staring at it. I waited a few more moments.
"Aren't you going to eat it?" He asked me, looking confused.
"Uh…yeah. Of course." I smiled at him while cutting it up into little pieces. I made them as small as I could then moved them around they plate, hoping dad wouldn't notice.
"So what are you up to today?" Dad asked, sitting next to me with his plate of food.
"I'm thinking about going on a run on the beach after this, then maybe I'll call Oliver and Lilly or something." I told him through bites of pancake.
"Okay. What's got you so into running now?" He looked at me questioningly.
"I guess it's the healthy thing to do. Plus, ALL the cool kids are doing it!" I joked and he grinned.
"Thanks for breakfast, dad. It was great." I smiled at him then got up to put my plate in the dishwasher.
After breakfast I went up into my room to change into some running clothes. I put on some Sofee shorts and a wife beater style tank top. Next I went into the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth.
When I looked in the mirror I felt sick that I had eaten those three pancakes. I shouldn't have done it.
Pancakes had so many calories! Oh god, I couldn't gain any more weight! I am going to do it this time, no chickening out this time.
I locked the door, then grabbed my toothbrush. Leaning over the toilet, I shoved the toothbrush back far enough to make me gag and then throw up. My breakfast fell into the toilet bowl, looking just like it had
about fifteen minutes ago, only with a tinge of yellow. I didn't want to look at it, so I quickly flushed the toilet.
Then I brushed my teeth, hoping to get rid of any after taste. I splashed some cold whatever on my face, then walked out of the bathroom and outside to go on my run.
This was how my pattern went for the next few days. I ran when I woke up and after lunch. And after basically every meal I ate, I made my way up to the toilet and threw it up. It was a whole lot easier then I thought it would be. During health classes they always made it seem like a big deal, but honestly, doing it felt almost natural. I figured this would be the best way to loose the weight because it was less suspicious and a whole lot easier than just not eating. And I was also enjoying the running when I
would remember to bring my iPod along.
We had been out of school for a week and a half now, and I was at the beach with Lilly and Oliver. Lilly and I were tanning with our magazines while Oliver was in the ocean.
"Guys, come on! The water is great!" Oliver called from the water.
"No." We said with no enthusiasm. He'd been trying to
get us in for about a half and hour now, and it obviously wasn't going to work.
"Okay then, you leave me no choice." Oliver took Lilly first and slung her over one shoulder, then bent over again and slung me over the other, "We're going
"No!! Put us down!" Lilly and I screamed, punching our fists into his back. Oliver had gotten surprisingly strong since we were freshman. He dumped us both in the water.
"I'll get you back for this." I told him darkly, then gave him my most evil smile. Oliver just smirked.
"Whoa, Miley, you're looking very skinny today." Lilly said, looking at me kind of worriedly.
"Huh, well that's weird. I've been eating more than ever." I lied, not meeting her eyes. Oliver poked my showing ribs.
"You are looking awfully skinny, Miles." He said, using the same worried tone that Lilly had used. Truthfully, I loved hearing them say this, even though I already knew it. This diet was working amazingly well. In my journal I record my food intake and weight loss and so far I've lost six pounds! If this kept going my way, I'd be a six zero in no time…
Heey everyone. I know I probably shouldn't be starting another story right now, but I'm still going to try to keep up with Ways Of Dealing. I've had this story for a while and have been like wanting to post it.