I own nothing but Kathryn Lockhart and Bain.

There is explicit sexual content in this. You've been warned.

This was my first fanfic and I was feeling nostalgic tonight. I know it kinda sucks, but hey, it was a first attempt. I got better, I swear!!

Rome's famous Trevi Fountain loomed in front of her. Even at three in the morning, the square was bustling with tourists. Men and women came at all hours to throw coins into the fountain. One coin over your shoulder meant that you would return to Rome, two meant that you would fall in love with an Italian, and three meant that you would marry said Italian. A silly superstition, to be sure, but Buffy hadn't been able to resist throwing a coin over her shoulder when she and her friends had visited the fountain earlier that day. Dawn had thrown all three.

Buffy couldn't sleep. They had been in Rome for five days now and every night Buffy lay in her hotel bed until she couldn't take anymore. She would take her clothes into the bathroom, where she wouldn't wake Willow and Dawn, dress, and leave. She would even tiptoe past Giles and Xander's door so as not to wake them either. She would wander through the streets until sunrise. Then, she would return to the hotel. If any of her friends noticed, they said nothing.

She wasn't sure what drew her back to the fountain. Maybe it was the fact that it was only two blocks from the hotel. Maybe it was because, at night, it's backlighting made it seem like a beacon. Maybe it was because she just wanted something to stare at while she got lost in her thoughts.

It had been six months since they had all left the crater formerly known as Sunnydale behind. They had driven to Los Angeles to let Angel know they had stopped the apocalypse and to plan their next move. When they unloaded the bus at the hotel, Buffy had found his suitcase. She waited until everyone else had gone to bed, and then drug it in to the bathroom. She sat on floor and slowly opened it. Inside was a note pinned on a red shirt. She gingerly unpinned it and began to read.


I'm guessing that I don't leave Sunnydale with you. I'm sure this amulet will see to that. So, in that event, there are some final things I want to say.

Remember when you took the job at the Double Meat Palace? I came to you and told you if you needed money, we could get it and you didn't have to work there? Well, luv, I meant it. I hope under this shirt is enough to keep you and the little bit safe for a long time."

Buffy gasped. She pulled the shirt out of the suitcase and underneath it was full of neatly stacked rows of bills. Tears streamed down her face as she realized what this would mean for her and Dawn. No more worries. But she couldn't help but wonder where it had all come from. She turned back to the letter still clutched in her hand.

"Don't worry, pet. It doesn't matter where it came from, just that you use it well. But because I know you won't drop it, you could say I had it invested and I made a withdrawal.

There are things in life that are inevitable; I am powerless to control them. The Sun will rise and set, the tide will come in and go out, the seasons will change, the birds will fly South for the winter and return in the spring, and the caterpillar will transform itself into a beautiful butterfly. Somehow, I feel reassured by this because many other things in life are so transient - so momentary. You have truly become the star of my life, which brings me light in this dark world, and warmth when I need it.

Take care of them all, as only you can.

All my love,


Tears coursed down her face in steady furrows. But at the bottom of the paper, there was a little more writing.

"Look in the shirt pocket."

Realizing there was someone standing just beside her, Buffy came reeling back into the present. But before she could even turn towards this intruder, a clear voice spoke.

"I mean you no ill will, Buffy Summers."

She looked at the figure. It was a dainty woman, thin, and no taller than Buffy herself. Her hair was black and long, at least to her waist. Her black clothes and pale skin were liken to a vampire, but this was no vampire. She had a strange warm power that trailed along Buffy's skin like silk. The woman stood, facing the fountain, her hair like a black velvet curtain hiding her face.

"Who…" Buffy began, but was interrupted when the woman spoke again.

"Angel told me I could find you here." She turned to face Buffy. Her skin looked like it had been carved out of pure white marble. Full red lips and beautiful high cheekbones turned her face into art, but Buffy couldn't stop staring at her eyes. Her eyes were like lavender jewels set into her pale face. As she moved, her hair shifted to reveal elongated pointy ears. 'Humans don't have eyes and ears like that,' Buffy thought to herself.

"Angel sent you here?" she asked. "But who are you?"

"My name is Kathryn Lockhart. I came here to help you."

Buffy looked at the woman in disbelief. Why would anyone she had never seen before come all the way from Los Angeles to help her? "Help me with what exactly?" she asked.

"It's kind of a long story, Miss Summers. I have lodging a few blocks from here. I will gladly tell you my story if you will come with me."

Buffy looked at Kathryn appraisingly. If she was here to attack her, Buffy was almost completely sure she could take her without a problem….that is, if she was human. But now Buffy was pretty sure that human wasn't what she was. 'Well,' Buffy thought to herself, 'there's no harm in asking. How should I put this….?'

"What are you?" Buffy blurted out. 'So much for tact,' she thought.

Kathryn's laughter was high and clear like the ringing of chimes. "I'll explain on the way." With that, she turned on her heel and walked away. Buffy knew that, in order to find out what was going on, she would have to follow the strange woman. Sighing, she sprinted to catch up. When she came alongside her, she waited patiently for Kathryn to speak.

"I am a Sidhe." She said.

"A she?" Buffy asked incredulously.

Kathryn smiled. "No, S-I-D-H-E, pronounced 'she."

"Ok, and what is that exactly?" Buffy questioned.

When Kathryn didn't reply, Buffy pulled out her cell phone. A sleepy Giles answered the call. "Hello?"

"Hi Giles. I was wondering if you knew what a Sidhe was." Buffy said brightly.

"A girl." Giles replied groggily.

"No Giles," Buffy explained. She spelled the word for him.

"Oh, yes, well, of course." He seemed much more awake at the prospect of being able to lecture. "The Sidhe are considered to be a distinct race, quite separate from human beings yet who have had much contact with mortals over the centuries, and there are many documented testimonies to this. Belief in this race of beings who have powers beyond those of men once played a huge part in the lives of people living in rural Ireland and Scotland," he replied.

"So they aren't human. But what are they?"

"They are the fey. The fairy folk," he said simply.

"Are they good?"

"Most of them, yes. They always tell the truth, though, so most of them make their intentions known early on," he finished.

"Thanks, Giles. Go back to bed now." Buffy hung up her phone. She walked alongside Kathryn in silence. They turned up a small walkway up to a huge house. When they got to the door, Kathryn held her hand before a leaf insignia and after a moment, the door swung open on it's own accord. "How did you do that?" Buffy asked as they walked in.

"The house recognizes people of my blood." Kathryn replied, as if that explained everything. They walked down a hall, and into a living room with a fireplace and two couches facing each other. Both women took opposing sides.

"Are you really a fairy?" Buffy felt as though she had waited long enough to ask this question.

"Yes, I am," she replied. "Let me tell you why we are here. Every Sidhe has a distinct power, more like a talent that we alone can do. In example, my mother can make plants grow by touching them. My lover, Bain, can sense others pain. He feels it and can read the cause. That's why I'm here."

Buffy stared at the woman with confusion. "I don't understand."

"Bain and I live in a apartment next to an old hotel in L.A. The Hyperion. Six months ago, Bain fell to the floor in agony. He cried for a man he didn't know. A man named Spike."

Buffy's eyes were as round as dinner plates, her mouth dry as the desert. Kathryn continued to speak. "He told me your story as he saw it through your pain. He told me that you were in love with a man named Spike and due to dramatic and violent circumstances, he was lost to you. Bain asked that I help you, but when we went to the hotel and asked Angel about you, you were already gone. I have followed you around the world, and now I have finally caught up with you. I believe I can use my power to help you."

Buffy was spellbound by the tale. "How can you help me? What's your power?" she demanded.

Kathryn looked at her hands. "I have an affinity for the dead. I can control them, raise them, and even resurrect vampires." At the last word, she looked at Buffy intensely.

Buffy blinked back tears. Willow and Giles had looked for spells to bring Spike back. They had only recently given up the cause as futile. Buffy had all but lost hope of ever looking into his eyes again. It was funny. There was a time in her life where she would have done anything to be rid of his presence, and now, he was the only person in world she wanted to see. She began to tell Kathryn things she had never even admitted to her friends.

"Before the final fight with the uber-vamps, my friends, everyone betrayed me. They told me I couldn't lead anymore because I was reckless. I left the house and found an abandoned, well, pretty much abandoned house to stay in until I figured out something else to do. Spike came to me that night. He had been away investigating our enemies when my friends turned on me. He defended me and then came after me. No one else even came to my aid. He spent that night just holding me. It was the most wonderful night of my life."

She took a deep shaky breath before continuing. "When we were fighting and I realized he wouldn't be leaving with me, I told him that I loved him. He didn't even believe me. I wish I hadn't waited so long to tell him." She pulled a chain out of her shirt and leaned forward to show the ring that hug from it to Kathryn. "You see, he left this for me in the pocket of his shirt in his suitcase. I haven't taken it of since. My friends don't even know I have it. I just haven't been able to let him go. Now, I meet you and you tell me you can give him back to me? I have hardly dared to dream that such a thing would be possible."

Kathryn came to kneel in front of Buffy. "I know that you love this man. I know that you were hurt when he was ripped away from you. But I am offering you a chance. A chance to be happy. How many times have you saved the world, Buffy? How many times did you save me when I didn't even realize it? You have saved us all. This is the least I can do for you. Let me help you."

"When can you do it," Buffy asked.

Kathryn beamed at her. "Right now," she replied.

Buffy knelt in front of the fireplace. She was shaking so much she could barely strike the match. After several tries, she finally had a roaring fire. It bathed the room in a glowing flickering light. Buffy stared at it, remembering the fire that had engulfed hers and Spike's hands the last time she had seen him. Was this the right thing to do? Maybe not, but she couldn't just turn back now. Not with the prospect of holding Spike in her arms again so close. Buffy turned to the woman behind her. "What else do you need?" she asked.

Kathryn was pushing the couches out of the way. "This isn't like a magic spell, Buffy. I don't need candles or sage or any such thing. It's a gift I was born with. It's a natural thing for me to do, like breathing," she replied.

"How old are you? I mean, how long do fairies live? And why have I never met one before?" Buffy wondered aloud.

"Fairies are immortal," Kathryn answered. She began rolling the area rug out of the way. "Truly immortal, not like vampires. You could drain all my blood and still I would live. I am seven hundred and eighty two years old myself. And as for why you have never met one, we mostly live apart from humans. If people knew of us, and our powers, everyone would look for magical solutions to their everyday problems. About a hundred years ago, we all swore an oath to leave you humans alone for the most part."

Buffy gaped at her. "Well, you look amazing for your age!"

Kathryn chuckled. "Well, Buffy, are you ready?"

Buffy took a deep breath. What a ridiculous question. Was she ready to see the man she loved? "Yes, please."

Kathryn closed her lavender eyes and raised her hands over her head. Buffy gasped at what she saw. Dust was gathering in the air and arranging itself in the form of a human skeleton. It was like dusting a vamp, only slower and in reverse. She saw muscles materialize and attach to the skeleton. Skin flowed like liquid to cover the muscled form. Kathryn fell to her knees and Buffy rushed to her side. She helped her stand and Kathryn produced a small knife from her pocket.

"What's that for?" Buffy questioned.

The dark woman pointed and Buffy followed her gesture.

Kneeling in the center of the floor was Spike, naked and dazed. "He needs to feed to remember who he is." Kathryn replied. She went to stand in front of Spike. She held aloft her knife and said "Child of darkness, I call you forth. Drink of me and remember." With that, she brought down her knife in a rapid arc and sliced her own wrist. Her dark blood welled in the deep cut as she held it to the vampire's mouth. He pulled back his lips and hungrily began to feed.

"You see Buffy, before they have blood, they are just the shell. It takes blood to call back their essence, and in this case, his soul."

"It always has to be blood, doesn't it? It's never a soda, or some hot chocolate with tiny marshmallows." Buffy grabbed a blanket from the back of one of the couches. She kneeled down and wrapped Spike in it just as he broke away from Kathryn's wrist. He stared into her eyes.

"Buffy?" His voice was scratchy, like the voice of someone who has been screaming for a long time, hoarse and strained. "Buffy, where am I? I can't remember anything. Did we win the fight?"

Buffy brought her hand up and lightly touched his lips. "Yes, Spike," she whispered. "We won. You saved us all." She looked up at Kathryn, who was still standing above them. "I don't know how to thank you."

Kathryn held up her hand. "You need not. The world is indebted to you both. You are both more than welcome to use the house for the day. The sun will rise soon, and I believe Spike will be too wary to trek all the way to your hotel before the dawn." She muttered some words under her breath and the windows went dark, as if someone had painted them black. "The spell will last for twenty four hours. When the night comes, I suggest you return to your hotel. I am not the only fey with access to this house and not all are as….accommodating as I. There is blood and food in the refrigerator and clean sheets on all the beds upstairs. If there is nothing further you require, I will take my leave of you."

"But where will you go? I thought you had been staying here." Buffy alleged.

"I've been away from home to long. I'm going to see if I can catch a flight back to the states. I have someone waiting for me." She winked at Buffy. "If you're ever back in L. A., drop me a line."

Buffy stood and embraced her. She had no words, but when she looked into the other woman's eyes, it was enough. The gratitude was there, even if the words were not.

And so Kathryn turned with a smile on her face and left the house, shutting the door quietly behind her.

Buffy turned back to Spike, who still knelt on the floor. He looked up at her, his deep blue eyes filled with questioning. She smiled and sat down in front of him. "What's the last thing you remember?"

Spike sat on the couch, blanket tightly clutched around his body, visibly shaken. "So I was dead? And six months have past?"

Buffy sat next to him on the couch, rubbing small circles on his back with her hand. "Yes," she answered quietly. Having gone through this once herself, she knew how hard it was to come to terms with the fact that you had died, and now were somehow alive again.

"I'm sorry, pet. Can I have a little while to myself? I have to wrap my bloody mind around this."

Buffy was shocked and dismayed. She held back her tears and struggled to regain her composure. "Yeah, that's fine. I need to go find you some clothes anyway."

"Thanks, luv." Spike managed a weak smile,

Buffy smiled back and left the house. Once through the door, she leaned back on it and cried.

That wasn't how she had expected their reunion to go at all. She had thought Kathryn would leave and they would fall into each other's arms and make passionate love on the floor. So much for that idea. She looked up to the brightening sky through the dense trees surrounding the house. Nothing was going to be open this early, where was she going to go? Suddenly, she fell backward as the door opened. Spike stood there with the blanket wrapped around his waist like a towel. He cocked is head to the side and said, "Shoes?"

Buffy laughed. "Yes, I'll get you shoes."

He smiled at her and kissed her forehead. "Thanks, luv."

She walked away smiling. How could she have even considered that Spike would have the reservations that she had when she was just magically alive again? He just wasn't like that.

As she rounded the end of the street, she remembered that it was ridiculously early. She glanced at her cell phone. 6:37. Nothing would be open at this time. Buffy had a brilliant idea. She sprinted back to the hotel. She quietly slipped into her room. Willow and Dawn were still sleeping, so she tiptoed over to the door that connected Giles and Xander's room to theirs. She quietly opened the door, and crept into their room. She grabbed Xander's suitcase and pulled out a pair of black jeans, some socks and a pair of black tennis shoes. Buffy stifled a chuckle. She remembered the last time Spike had to borrow Xander's clothes. It would have to do. Then she returned to her room. She quietly opened her suitcase. Folded on the bottom was the red button down shirt Spike had left her in his suitcase. She stopped in the bathroom and grabbed the tiny bottles of shampoo and conditioner. Not being sure what the house already had in it, and knowing that Dawn or Willow could call the front desk if they needed more, she figured it was better to be safe than sorry. Then, she ran back to the house.

When she got inside, she called out for Spike. There was no answer. She went from room to room and finally found him in the master bedroom upstairs. He was curled up under the blankets asleep. She smiled down at him. Finding out you've been dead can take a lot out of you. Not wanting to wake him, she left the clothes at the end of the bed and wandered into the master bathroom. Buffy gasped. The bathroom was twice the size of her old bedroom in Sunnydale. 'The bathtub must seat at least eight,' Buffy thought to herself. 'You can practically swim in it.' She spotted a beautiful glass bottle of bubble bath. Why not? She started the water and poured some of the bubble bath into the tub. The air started to fill with steam and the scent of lilacs. Buffy swiftly undressed and climbed into the deep bathtub. She closed her eyes and laid her head back. She had almost drifted off to sleep when…


Buffy stretched and grabbed her cell phone from where she had left it on the counter. "Hello?" she answered breathlessly.

"Where are you?" Willow's voice came over the phone.

Shit. Buffy hadn't thought about what she was going to tell everyone about why she was gone and wouldn't be returning until sunrise tomorrow. "I can't tell you," she said. "But what I can say is that I'll be back to the hotel tomorrow morning and I have a surprise for everyone. But Will? No locater spells, ok? I really want this to be a surprise."

After hanging up the phone, she felt someone watching her. She turned and saw Spike leaning against the doorjamb. "Got room for one more, pet?"

"Only if it's you," Buffy replied.

She was rewarded with a shocked look that was quickly covered by an eyebrow raise and a mischievous smirk. Clearly he had been expecting a death threat. He dropped the blanket from around his waist and climbed in the tub to sit opposite her. He slid into the water and laid his head on the rim of the tub. He closed his eyes. "God," he breathed. "This almost makes me feel human."

Buffy grinned at him. "Did you like your clothing? I mean, I couldn't find any black boots or leather dusters. How will you ever survive?"

He smiled without opening his eyes. "At least I get to wear my own shirt, not one of Xander's poncy things."

Buffy shook her head. He had been back "alive" for only a few hours and he was glad he didn't have to wear Xander's shirt? Nothing bothered this man. It was amazing, and also one of the things Buffy loved about him. She wondered if this was the right time to say what she really wanted to say. She wanted to tell him that when she had told him she loved him, she had meant it. He didn't need to doubt her anymore. She knew she was in love with him. She had to tell him. She took a deep breath and…

Spike was staring at her. He reached out with his fingers and touched the chain at her neck. She watched as he followed the chain down to its apex between her breasts. Her breathing quickened as he touched the ring. She looked into his eyes and saw the look. The look a man gives you when he knows you want him as much as he wants you. The look was so full of lust and a promise of what was to come, it tightened things low in Buffy's body.

"Tell me, Slayer," Spike growled. "When's the last time anyone touched you?"

"Well, that depends," Buffy whispered. "When was the last time you touched me?"

Spike grabbed the ring and used the chain to pull her forward. He brushed some water droplets of her cheek with his thumb as he looked deeply into her eyes. She brushed his lips with her fingertips. They were as soft as silk and she slowly brought her lips to his.

He kissed her back with bruising force. With one hand on her back and the other at her cheek, he ate at her mouth like a man starved. She returned his kisses with an eager intensity. Spike let his fingers trace down her jaw line, past her smooth neck, and down to her pert breasts. She had a sharp intake of breath as he softly brushed his fingertips over her nipples. They hardened under his touch. She slid her hands down his dripping chest, over his tight abs, and touched his hardened manhood. He groaned low in his throat as she stroked him.

He stood and picked her up, dripping water all over the bathroom floor.

"Where are we going?" she asked him breathlessly.

"The bedroom."

He laid her back on the huge bed and lowered his face to her neck. He began to lick the water droplets off her, traveling slowly lower. He gave each nipple a quick kiss as he continued down her body. He used his hands to part her creamy thighs and began to lick the water off her legs starting just above her knees. His lips traveled over the velvety softness of her thighs, towards her center. When he reached it, he took her soft succulent pussy lips into his mouth and sucked them gently, each in turn. Using his fingers, he parted the lips and touched her clit with his tongue. He felt her body shudder in anticipation. He jabbed his tongue into her slit and lapped her sweet juices. Buffy grabbed his head and pressed it more firmly into her pussy. He pushed to fingers slowly into her opening while he sucked her clit. His long fingers were buried deep within her as she gyrated her hips against his face.

He slowly climbed her body. Still working his hand, Spike took one of her breasts in his mouth, biting down gently on the nipple, causing her pussy to spasm around his hand, her juices lightly coating his fingers. She had bitten her bottom lip in an attempt to stop crying out.

She reached out and positioned his massive length above her slick opening. Leaning in, he gently pressed his mouth to hers and sucked on her lower lip. Her green eyes were wild as he thrust his throbbing cock into her. She lifted her hips to meet him.

Buffy pulled him tightly to her, her hands on his hips. She fucked him back as hard as she could. She felt herself begin to climax, the warmth building in her belly and starting to spread through her body.

"Oh god, Spike!" she screamed.

Spike pulled her closer and kissed her hard. He shoved himself harder and harder into her, mouth still over hers as he came. "I love you, Buffy," he groaned.

She touched his cheek. "I love you, too," she whispered.

They crawled under the blankets and lay in one another's arms.

"There's been something I've wanted to tell you," Buffy began, "something I have said every night in my head since you died. I love you. I loved you then. I should have said it sooner. I just haven't been able to forgive myself because you died without really knowing how I truly feel."

She watched as the big bad vampire blinked back tears. For a moment, he said nothing, but she could see it in his eyes. She could tell that what she had said had meant the world to him. "Thank you, luv."

As dawn approached, the lovers stood in the hallway outside Buffy's hotel room door. All her friends were inside this room waiting for her. Spike had told her so. He could smell them within

Buffy wondered how many times someone had opened the door and looked up and down the hall waiting for her. She knew they were worried about her. The anxiety that radiated from inside the room was an almost touchable thing. She turned to Spike.

"We can't just walk in there together," she told him. "They might think you're some shape changing demon or something and attack you immediately. I think it will be best if you wait in the hall and let me…" she searched for the right word, "prepare them for this shock," she finished.

He slid down the wall and sat next to the door. He fished out the pack of smokes he had purchased on the walk over. He lit one with practiced ease. "Take your time, pet," he answered, blowing out a plume of smoke. "Good luck."

She nodded, got out her key, and went inside.

Just as Spike had theorized, they were all inside. Dawn and Willow sat on the two beds, while Xander lounged on the small couch. Giles paced about the room and cleaned his glasses. They all looked up as she entered. No one spoke. Buffy sat on the edge of one of the beds. She looked at each in turn.

"The day that Spike died, I lost an important piece of myself. I didn't really realize how much he meant until he was gone." She smiled at Willow. "Remember when I would have given anything just to get him to leave me alone?"

Willow gave Buffy a sad smile. "Why didn't you tell anyone that you feel this way?"

"I've tried to hide it. I didn't want you to worry, or," she looked at Xander as she said it, "I didn't want to undergo any judgment for my feelings, but I've just felt dead inside. I wander the streets every night in search of a release from the pain of living without him in my life. You don't know how many times I wished some evil thing I couldn't defeat would come tearing out of the night and kill me where I stood just so I could stop hurting. He was my constant. I knew that, whatever happened, no matter who else had turned their backs that he would never desert me. He would have followed me straight to hell, and very nearly did." Buffy took a deep breath and continued. "Without him, I have felt lost, and alone, and unhappy."

The room was dead silent as her friends waited with bated breath.

"When we came here, I realized that there weren't many supernatural forces. I guess with all the religious artifacts here, the demonically aggressive aren't exactly running here. I had given up all hope about running into anything non-human. I was wrong."

With that, she stood and walked to the door. She opened it and extended her hand to help Spike up from his sitting position on the floor. To surprised gasps, she and Spike walked to the center of the room together. Buffy smiled warmly at Spike and then turned to her friends.

"Look what I found."