AN: The tittle is inspired by the Switchfoot song by the same name. Though this story has little to do with it (hahaha) I just thought it fit Nathan's current state of being.

Takes place in between the first and second episode of Season 2. (Though it will turn into an AU story once we all see the 2nd episode lol)

Anyway I hope you all like it!

Spoilers: Major spoilers for How to Stop and Exploding Man, and 4 Months Later. Minor for the rest of season 1


Chapter 1: Sinking

Nathan took a deep swig of the fiery liquid. It burned all the way down his throat. He never had liked the substance, not even when he went to parties in college. Now he was just 'drinking away the sorrow'. That's how Heidi put it.

"She doesn't understand," he whispered into the bottle. He knew she was broken with sorrow too, but not like he was.

Nathan looked up at the slab of stone in front of him. Engraved in it were the words Peter Austin Petrelli 1980-2006.

"Here's to you," Nathan muttered his voice slurred and broken.

"You're drunk again," a familiar voice chided. Nathan looked at the figure leaning on his brother's tombstone. Before him stood a boy of fifteen years. His jet black hair falling in front of his big brown eyes. "Why do you only come to see me when you're intoxicated?"

"Because it hurts too much when I'm sober," Nathan replied bitterly. The boy walked over and kneeled down in front of him.

"Why are you here?" the boy asked softly, laying his hand on the older Petrelli's shoulder. The touch felt so real that Nathan could not contain a shudder.

"I needed to see you, Peter."

The boy looked sympathetically at him.

"I hate seeing you like this," young Peter quietly answered.

"You sound like Heidi," Nathan laughed bitterly, "You always did."

"And where's Heidi now?" asked the boy giving Nathan the look Peter was always so good at, reprimanding while somehow still kind.

"Don't look at me like that!" Nathan yelled, his guilt boiling over into anger.

"You're a mess," Peter answered. Nathan looked at him, the depths of desperation shinning clearly in the older brother's eyes.

"I need you Peter." Nathan felt the all too familiar tears begin to well up in his eyes. Peter met his gaze squarely.

"Then find me."

Nathan staggered to his feet, swaying in an attempt to stay on his wobbly legs.

"I'm trying to!" He shouted. The boy stood before him, unflinching at his raised tone.

"Find me Nathan," The voice grew deeper and suddenly Nathan found himself staring into the face of Peter as he knew him four months ago. His dark hair pushed behind his ear, his skin deathly pale from being comatosed. His very being was radiating light.

Nathan knew without looking where his memories had taken him, Kirby Plaza. He watched as the phantoms of that awful remembrance played the scene out before his eyes.

I took his power…I can't control it.

I'm not leaving you Peter.

Nathan looked away, unable to take it again. Slowly he blinked his eyes open and the dreamed memory was gone.

"Where am I?" It took him a moment to remember where he had seen this rooftop before, but he knew instantly that he had seen it. It was so unlike most of the boring rooftops in this city. The half wall was decorated by stone cherubs and the roof itself was shattered with Pidgin coops.

"Hello Nathan." The Petrelli turned around to find a familiar old man staring back at him.

"Charles Deavux?" He questioned, running a hand across his face. "Heidi is right I really should stop drinking." Charles placed a reassuring hand on Nathan's shoulder.

"This is no dream. I've been trying to get in touch with you," explained the older man.

"But…you're dead," Nathan replied skeptically.

"Yes in 2007 I am dead."

A conversation Nathan had once had with Hiro played across his mind. He ran a hand through his hair knowing there would be grey in it when all of this was done.

"I can't believe I'm going to say this…" Nathan muttered "What year are we in?"

"For you it's still 2007," Charles replied, "But for me it is early 2006." Nathan stared blankly at Charles, even his intelligent mind finding this conversation hard to comprehend.

"Time holds no meaning to a Clairvoyant," Charles explained. He laughed good naturedly at the confused look on Nathan's face. "All you need to understand is this. I have a message for you, Nathan Petrelli; but I knew you would listen to Peter better than me." Thus saying Charles waved his hand and Nathan turned around.

Before him stood seven year old Peter, with tears filling his brown eyes. Nathan felt his heart wrench painfully at the sight. He kneeled down in front of the specter of his brother, and pulled the child too him. Peter pushed quickly away.

"What's wrong?" Nathan asked him.

"Our family is falling apart," little Peter sobbed. "Heidi and the kid's are gone, you and mom are a mess. You need to fix this Nathan. You're the only one who can."

"How?" Nathan begged desperately.

"Throw away that bottle and come find me," Peter responded.

"Where are you?" Nathan asked. "Peter where are you?" But the vision was slowly fading away to darkness. Nathan opened his eyes slowly. He found himself back in the cemetery beside Peter's tombstone.

Nothing had changed. Nathan was still drunk, Heidi was still gone and he still had no idea where Peter was. Nothing had changed, but something had.

Nathan stood, tossed the bottle away and flew off into the clear blue sky.