A/N Hey guys. I hope you like this one. It's a bit of a JD Whumping story and its got a lot of JDA. If you're not a fan, don't go any further. If you do like it tho, please let me know, so that I know that I should continue.
Disclaimer- I don't own any characters or anything else related to Scrubs.
Have you ever woken up and decided that today is a good day to die? Probably not, not unless you're suicidal. Unfortunately, if you wake up to excruciating pain in your chest, thoughts start to drift that way, just to make it go away. This has been happening on and off lately. Thankfully it goes away after a few minutes, but when its there, nothing in the world can be compared to it. I mean I've never actually been stabbed but I have had some very unfortunate accidents involving sharp objects like spears (don't ask) forks and screwdrivers. So I can say this with some what confidence, this definitely hurts more than a knife twisting in your gut or anywhere else. I should probably do something about it, I mean I'm a doctor, who better to say that crazy pain in the chest is a bad thing. I don't know, I'm avoiding it in part because I'm hoping it will go away on its own, and on the other hand, who has the time to get sick anymore? I seem to be working all the time these days, and when I'm not working, I just want to relax and forget about everything. So if I have to ride out a little bit of pain to avoid kissing goodbye to my downtime, or the possibility of getting admitted for something stupid, I'm okay with that. In all honesty though, I'm just not taking any chances of getting examined by Dr Cox again. That was so not my shining moment, it was like an anti- shining moment. Speaking of which, I think I see stars, and I know its sunny outside because my stupid alarm is going off the hook and the sun is totally burning my belly through the opening on my curtain. This is really bad. Something in my chest is definitely ready to explode. I need to do the onesies now, which means I will probably have to get up sooner rather than later. Owie!
Its starting to ease up a bit now though, and I realize that I've been panting for breath. How do you not notice that you're not breathing? How weird would it be if I died because I didn't realize I wasn't breathing and suffocated? I'd have to leave myself a pink sticky note saying "remember to breathe." I bet Elliot will get a laugh out of that one. She seems to find things that she doesn't understand the context of, extremely funny, but will she laugh at my brilliant jokes? No! Ok that's not true, she giggles very sweetly when I crack a joke. I'm just being Mr. Grumpy-and-dying-of-chest-pain in the morning. I have to snap myself out of it though, today is going to be a long day and I need to be bright eyed and bushy tailed, if only so that I can get on Dr. Cox's nerves. I love it when he starts ranting just because I wave at him. I mean you should hear the stuff that he comes up with even when he has no real material to go on, a genius in his own right.
So, I've decided to suck it up and get out of bed now. It still hurts but not as much as before, I'll be able to function at least. I'm sure it'll be gone by the time I get to work. I think I'll take the cab to work today though, I don't particularly want to ride Sasha, just too tired. I didn't even get to sleep through the night, it was one of those "can't find a position to sleep in" nights. I hate those. They should sell beds that tell you which position to sleep n when you can't find one on your own.
Imagines lying on the bed." Over here you idiot!" Says the bed which seems to have grown two eyes, a mouth and a nose over the blanket. "Ahh, not the foot side! Can't I put my head near the headboard?"JD wines.
"No you moron, who's the bed here anyway, me or you. Get you face down there or I'll make you so uncomfortable, you'll wish you were sleeping on the floor."
Why do I always get angry furniture? Anyway, I'm going to be late if I don't rush right now. I can tell this is going to be a crappy day. I don't even have time to grab a slushy! At least the pain from hell is now gone. Thank god, I was not looking forward to working through the day with that.
Even though my day didn't start right, I was determined to have a decent preparation ritual outside the hospital, like I usually do. So there I was, listening to Mika singing Grace Kelly and trying desperately to control my automatic dance reflexes. I wasn't doing a good job though because my but kept moving left to right. What can I say, it's a great song, it's hard not to dance to it. At least Turk isn't here to reprimand me.
"JD! How many times do I gatta tell you man, white boys don't dance."
"Sorry' Dammit, where did he come from?
So there, I got my 10 seconds of song and dance before I was interrupted by my buddy who's face I feel like smushing. My day has officially begun very wrong, But hey, I'm not giving up this easily, if I can't dance, then I'm walk to the music.
"You can't do the cat walk either." Crap!
"So C-bear! What you got planned tonight?"
"Not that much. Carla wants to take Izzie to her aunt so I'm home free! Wanna do something tonight?"
"Ugh, I can't, I've got the night shift." I forgot about that. This day is going to go on forever. I already feel drained.
"Dude, you need to do something about your shifts, you look like you're gonna pass out on your feet. How many night shifts have you done this week?"
"This would be the fourth, and I've been doubling up on the day shifts to cover some of my Intern's patients."
"What? What the hell for?"
"Her grandmother just died. She's pretty upset. It's ok though, its only temporary."
"Yea well don't over do yourself man, its not like you already don't spend all your life here."
"Aww C-brear! You're worried about me." I can't help it, I know it freaks him out when I get all mushy on him, it's so funny.
"I'm not worried. Who said I'm worried? I am just expressing my opinion."
"No, as a doctor, I am expressing my medical opinion that you are over-work yourself."
"whatever you say Chocolate bear."
Walking into the hospital, I feel all my exhaustion and discomfort fade away. I have work to do, people to help and interns to teach, no time for being sick or tired. Not to mention, I have Dr Cox to irritate.
"Hey Dr. Cox." I say with all the false cheerfulness I could muster, coupled with a slow wave.
"Strike one." What?
"What's strike one?"
"That is the first strike out of three that you're going to get today before I smother you to death for bugging me so much that I don't mind committing murder. You are now down one, by addressing me for no apparent reason and for doing the princess wave and basically being the annoying little girl that you are. Now go, go go." Ah, nothing like a good rant in the morning. I already feel better. Now I can begin my day like I normally do.
You see, I've come to realize that there is a lot of love behind Dr. Cox' rant and no matter what he says, the underlying meaning is that he actually cares. So instead of taking it personally, I've started taking it as a sign that all is well in "Cox's world". Thus, my day will not go too horribly wrong.
It's only been a couple of hours since my shift started and I'm already feeling like I'm going to pass out. The horrible crushing pain is back, only its coming and going very frequently and is disrupting my focus. A few moments ago, it peaked to a point where my vision started to blur. Thank god I wasn't with a patient. In fact, I'm glad no one was around. I'm sitting in my office right now, pretending to do some paperwork, but in truth, I'm resting my forehead against the table, riding out the monstrosity that is my chest.
A loud banging noise jerks me of the table.
"JD! I've been looking everywhere for you. Why aren't you answering your pager?"
I was paged? When? God I'm so not on top of my game today.
"Sorry Elliot, I was doing some paperwork." I say lamely. I don't even have papers on my desk. I'm clentching my teeth a little bit right now. Everything is hurting so much that I'm finding it hard to keep my hand from squishing my chest. This is just ridiculous, I need to get checked out.
"Are you ok? You seem really tense."
"Yea, I've just been sitting in the same spot too long." Why am I lying? God, it hurts, I should just tell her. I know I won't though, she'll get all worried and bothered. I'm just not up to handling that right now.
"Are you sure?" Oh please, today of all days, you pick to take notice of me. Where is Keith when you need him?
"Yea, Why were you paging me?" Good, concentrate on other things.
"Oh, yea, Turk wants to talk to you about doing a surgical procedure on one of you patients, and Dr Cox told me to give you these, patients. He's gone to pick up Jack from school. He said he'll be back in an hour." Her hands seem so cold as she hands the charts over. I can feel a chill run down my spine as her fingers brush against my palms. At the same time though, I draw comfort from her touch. She a such a beautiful and caring crazy cold neurotic. For a moment I wish we were together, but that moment passes as she takes back her hand. She's with someone else now, and I've already hurt her enough times.
"Ok that's fine. Thanks Elliot." I say, schooling back my face so that it neither shows my physical pain nor emotional. Things are easier this way.
"I'll see you at lunch then?"
I can't even think about food right now but I don't want to disappoint her. "Sure. I'll see you there." With that she smiles a little and walks away, closing the door behind her. I'm almost tempted to go right back to my earlier position but I can't, I have work to do.
I worked right through lunch because of all the extra patients. It's been a rough day and I have no doubt that it will get even worse. The pain in my chest had gone down considerably ever since I started working again. I was going by the theory that I was being punished for taking breaks so I just didn't take them. That was until I had to go looking for Carla at the Nurse station. I was so tired that I just spaced out, leaning on the counter.
"Sorry Carla, what were you saying?"
"Are you ok, I've been calling your name for the past minute."
"Sorry, just tired."
"Go home. You're too tired to be here. Let the interns handle some of your patients. You shouldn't have to take over other people's work when you have so much of your own."
"I can't, I already gave as many patients away as they could handle. Besides, I have the night shift today too. There's no point in going home now."
"Aww What's the matter Pamela, bit off more than you can chew?"
"Perry!" Carla can be scary when she wants to be. She's giving Dr. Cox the third degree just by glaring at him. I would not want to be him right now.
"Are all my patients alive Candy?" He seems more tame now. I have to get lessons from Carla on how to handle Dr. Cox some time
"All alive and accounted for." As I hand over the charts, searing pain suddenly erupts in my chest once again and this time its worse than anything I've ever experienced before. I can feel my knuckles go white as I grip the charts like dear life.
"Ya actually have to let go Newbie…" I let go immodestly but grab onto the counter for support. Tears are rolling down my cheeks now. My face must give away how truly uncomfortable I am because Dr. Cox's attitude suddenly changes.
"Newbie?" I can't get myself to answer him as another bout of pain surges through my chest and my hands shoot up to some how grab the little man with the ax that is using my chest as a chopping board. I'm trying really hard not to scream but I know I let out an involuntary gasp.
"Hey, take it easy big guy. What's wrong?" He is grabbing hold of me now, as my knees begin to buckle. Carla is right there next to me too.
"Bambi, take it easy. What hurts?"
"Chest. Really hurts. Its like being…stabbed." Wow, I feel so horrible right now that I'm becoming detached. For some reason, I start to think about pie. Apple pie, cherry pie, lemon pie and every other pie I can think of. Somewhere in my mind, I know I'm being random, but its helping me not thinking about the pain. That's until I see Turk's worried eyes above me. I didn't even realize I was lying on the floor, my head is on something cushy. I look further upwards and realize that its Dr. Cox. He looks frantic, he's yelling at people to grab gunnies and something about prepping for chest x-ray. The way his voice breaks sort of freaks me out. I think I've scared all my friends. That in itse;f is scary because we're all doctors. Getting sick isn't anything new for us. Maybe its because none of us ever passed out in the middle of work before. Its probably too close to home. We're doctors, we supposed to take care of other people, not get sick. As I'm thinking of all this, I realize that I'm being lifted. Amongst all the touches, I can distinguish Turk's gentle but firm hands, Carla's warm ones and Elliot's super-cold ones. Dr. Cox is now running beside me as I'm wheeled out of the lobby. As I watch the white lights pass by above my head, I realize that its getting harder and harder to breathe. Dark spots dance around in my vision before everything goes blank. The last thing I hear is Dr Cox's voice.
"Hang on Newbie."
A/N: Thanks for reading please review! And I'm sorry for the spelling errors.