Hey everyone, this fic is an idea I got after watching Dead Man Walking (Season 4, episode 16). It mainly deals with the Ziva/Roy relationship, which I think should have happened. It also has some Tiva friendship, hear that, friendship lol. I'm sure many of you know, I'm a Tate shipper! I haven't started shipping Tiva! lol. It is the first fic I've done that centres around Ziva, so I hope it's not too OOC. Anyway I hope you like it.

Disclaimer: Well of course I don't own it.



Ziva was sitting at her desk. She couldn't help thinking about Roy, 'Why did this have to happen to me? Me of all people.' She'd been asking herself that all day. There wasn't much work to be done at NCIS at the moment, all that remained for Ziva was to file the paper work on Roy's case. She had tried to focus on the work and not let her emotions take over and break her concentration, however this didn't work well. She was too emotionally involved in this one.

She was not usually one to fall for men easily, sure she found certain men attractive but she wasn't the type to go ga-ga over them. At least that's how she made it out to be, she had a cool and calm exterior, one which nothing seemed to be able to phase. How she felt on the inside was a different matter. Ziva had many buried emotions, she generally did not warm up to people quickly, she wasn't really a people person. She preferred solitude. However recently she'd come to see that people weren't all that bad and it was okay to let a little of what she felt show through. This realisation had been mainly caused by her meeting Roy.

She didn't know what it was about him but she felt like she could be her true self around him, they were so compatible. She reached into her backpack and pulled out Roy's bright orange beanie; her only keepsake; a reminder of her lost love. Tears began to form in her eyes.

Soon after Tony entered the bullpen and saw Ziva with the beanie. He could see she was hurting, he decided to talk to her, "Ziva, you okay?"

Ziva reacted quickly; she quickly placed the beanie out of Tony's sight and wiped her eyes. "Of course I am, why wouldn't I be."

"Ziva, I know when your fine and believe me you're not fine."

"Suddenly you're an expert in emotions." Ziva stated, trying to re-direct the subject away from her.

"Ziva, it's okay to feel sad."

"There you go again, Mr. Emotions Expert." She retorted.

"Ziva…" Tony began.

Ziva stopped him, "I know you're only trying to help Tony, I appreciate it, really, but I can deal with this by myself."

"You don't look like you can Ziva. Your eyes are red and you look so sad, that to me doesn't look like you're handling it." Tony said.

Ziva could see he was right. She was having trouble dealing with it. She'd been the same after her brother Ari's death. She'd cried for Ari and now she was crying for Roy. She looked away from Tony, down at the beanie (it was in her hands, which were resting on her lap). "This is all I have left of him."

"You have the memories too, Ziva." Tony reassured her.

"Memories aren't enough Tony." Ziva replied, still holding on tightly to the beanie.

"Make the best of it not the worst." Tony said, trying to reassure his friend.

"Thankyou Tony."

"Any time Ziva."

Ziva smiled at her partner's comment, it was comforting to her that Tony was there to support her. While she wasn't altogether happy with Tony's relationship with his 'mystery girlfriend' she could see that him being with her had changed him in a lot of ways and she liked it. Even though she had not known Kate, she had heard a lot about her from Tony especially but also Abby, Ducky, Gibbs and McGee, she thought that if Kate were here now she would be proud of how far Tony had come.

Tony noticed Ziva's far-away expression, "Feel better Ziva?"

"Actually Tony, I do." She reassured him.

"Good. Did I help with that?"

'Yes, in more ways than you know Tony' She thought. She smiled and said, "Yes actually, you did. I now know that it's okay to accept advice from my friends. Thanks to you."

"Remember, Ziva, I'm always here if you need me." Tony said.

"That's good to know Tony." Ziva smiled, she certainly did feel better now.

After a moment of what could be deemed awkward silence, Ziva looked up at Tony and said, "Tony…"

"Grab your gear we have a case." Gibbs announced. Tony and Ziva reacted immediately, 'looks like the lull is over.' Ziva thought. As she and Tony headed towards the elevator Tony asked, "Ziva, what were you going to say?"

Ziva looked towards her partner and replied, "Never mind Tony, I guess it's just not the right time to say it."

Tony was slightly confused by Ziva's remark but saw from the look on her face that she didn't want him to press the issue, that and the fact that Gibbs just entered the elevator.

The End.

So, what did you think? Press that little button and let me know. Thanks :-)