A/N: I guess I have to say one review did it for me. I'm such a sap. I don't like it when girls cry. -sniffles- because I cry too. So I am ending Without and hopefully you all will like it. Volk-san! I did this for you!

And let's see. Yurianimeotaku. Thank you SOOOOOOOOO much for your deligthful mini feeds. I am sad to say I cannot add your last one in. It would be a real treat. SO if anyone like yurianimeotaku's mini feeds make sure to read the review page.

A/N2: Thank you SOOOO SOOO SOO FOOKING much Tiffany for being my beta! I hope everyone praises her work because I forced the job on her. I pouted and begged for her to beta my story. And she did such a GOOOD job too. Not too mentioned she laughed her ass off at all my errors. So all in good fun. I deserve that. -grins- And I hope again...it is well recieved.

Enjoy the final chapter.

Without by Kara Papas

beta-ed by Moonfreckle



The distance was not too far apart. Yet the distance was so great that the air became thick with so many emotions and such raw intensity that no one would dare interrupt this scene that must have been played out by the gods. It was a sick fate game of the gods as they toyed senselessly with this enduring pair. These lovers crossed at every point always with something to set themselves back, and the moon was decidedly full this night as if to make the garden into a stage for unseen vicarious viewers. The anxiety of the silence slowly tortured all souls present and the two who stood at odds with each other began to replay a memory so sweet and innocent.

A midnight gust blew through the garden and brushed Natsuki's hair in the same manner as the last time she stood there like she was now. She was shocked that Shizuru would dare pull the same stunt twice. Natsuki's hands fell slack at her sides and her chest began to rise and fall so fast that she wondered if she'd pass out from hyperventilation. She forcefully placed one foot down in front of her as if she was learning how to walk again. The movement seemed painful and Shizuru's weak smile could not mirror the one from memory that began to fade. Her crimson eyes were set ablaze and she watched Natsuki as her heart welled and screamed. She could not resist this woman before her but her weakness would not let her step any further. Her pride was not smothering her but the wounds were far deeper than they had ever been.

Natsuki was starting to get a nervous tick as she finally planted her other foot down ahead of the other making only two successful movements towards this specter of her love. Natsuki bottom lip began to tremble as she swore the winds had shifted to blow the scent of Shizuru's perfume in her direction. Natsuki's eyes clenched shut and she balled her fists as hard as she could.


The word hit Shizuru hard and punched a very deep hole into her heart making her physically stagger backwards making the distance between her and Natsuki unchanged. Natsuki opened her eyes and saw Shizuru desperately clench at her chest as the emotions flowed freely from her being. Natsuki had not seen this kind of pain in Shizuru before. The only pain close to this was at the end of the carnival and that was a memory she did not need to have rehashed. It was too late however. The world came crashing in around the two as Natsuki almost snarled at Shizuru.

"Why damn it!!!! Tell me why do you exist! You cruel woman!" Natsuki yelled at Shizuru like her soul was being ripped from her body and all the pain she had felt was sent with that yell. The pain and guilt were present and Shizuru's tears were now shielded by her hands. Natsuki found her strength through her bitter rage and began to violently close the distance between them. The force was stronger than anything nature had willingly shown through the mere actions of emotion. Shizuru could hear her approach and in her defense she screamed back.

"STOP!" Shizuru voice was just as broken. Her beauty was even more intensified by her tear stained face. Natsuki had stopped only about three steps away from Shizuru. The two were still so far apart, and now that Natsuki was so close she could see something in Shizuru's eyes that she had seen in her own after discovering that Shizuru was having an ideal relationship during her studies. Natsuki slapped her hand over her mouth as the realization sunk in; Shizuru had seen her with Mai earlier that day. Shizuru knew and found out in a far worse manner than she did. The sobs were uncontrolled and heavy. Shizuru took a step forward; just a small step, but it was so great that it shook fate itself.

"I love you…" The words were so silent and hushed that they crawled into Natsuki's skin and traveled up her spine sending deep chills and reminded her that she too loves Shizuru. Shizuru's tears dripped to the ground. "I love you enough…." Shizuru looked up at Natsuki as the tears remained flowing as she stretched out her hand to the side of Natsuki's face not even touching her skin but almost so close. Natsuki raised her hand to grab Shizuru's but was halted.

"Stop…Natsuki….just stop…" Shizuru said looking at her lips as if she were starved orphan. "You're always so beautiful, Natsuki….oh god….I can't say it." Shizuru gritted her teeth and shifted her feet to backup which she slowly did. Natsuki's hand extended outward towards Shizuru.

"Please….no…Shizuru….don't do this….everything I love." Natsuki tears started to show. Shizuru almost went mad with the torture of her soul for the green eyes glistening before her.

"Don't say it….God Natsuki…don't say it. You have…someone else. I know who it is. I should have seen it coming…she will not give you up. And my heart is…too much in love with you to let go as well, but Natsuki. Oh Natsuki…I love you enough to let you go." And Shizuru turned away in that moment. Natsuki phone went off right as she was going to charge after Shizuru and tell her how much she still loved her and how she wished she could take everything back. It was too late though. Or was it? Natsuki was cursing herself as she watched Shizuru walk away from her. Shizuru's stride staggered and she'd pause from time to time. Natsuki could hear Shizuru's heavy sobs and cries. Natsuki phone rang again. She looked at the caller ID and it said Mai. She quickly turned it on and held the phone to her face.

"Take the bus home…." Natsuki said quickly and then ripped her phone in half. Shizuru was not too far.

"SHIZURU!" Natsuki screamed. "Shizuru…" Shizuru looked over her shoulder with those rich crimson eyes that instantly pierced into Natsuki soul in that very moment. Natsuki stretched out her hand to Shizuru. "Come back to me…I cannot let you let me go…I love you." Shizuru laughed a bit as the sanity washed away. In a quiet whisper she said another old phrase.

"Do you hate me that much?" It was so soft that even Natsuki had to question what she said to the point where Shizuru screamed it the same way did during the carnival.

"Do you hate me that much?" The words jarred into Natsuki and she watched Shizuru grabbed for her heart again. The Kyoto born woman looked as if she was about to fall and in that moment history replayed itself in an odd manner. Natsuki lunged forward and crashed against the ground catching Shizuru in a trembling embrace.

"Shizuru…." Natsuki whispered against the woman's ear. "I love you…"

Shizuru's arms wrapped her around Natsuki as she buried her face into the woman's raven tresses and kissed her gently against her neck. The sobs were more controlled and steadied out as words formed in her mouth.

"Natsuki, I'll never let you go again. I'll never let you go. Please don't leave me….I don't care if you want anyone else. Let me have you just now. In this moment…And I can go on. No….I can't I can't…..Natsuki. I love you…."

Both women were on their knees as they slowly parted from their embrace. Natsuki smiled ever so sweetly looking upon Shizuru who had wiped her tears clean and still managed to look beautiful. Natsuki brushed the hair from Shizuru's face and cupped her cheek ever so slightly drawing Shizuru in for a kiss. Once again the two women were bonded by their strong love as their lips united. They had broken a nightmare that had been long running and with a unified sigh they continued on into the passionate kiss displaying all that they could into that moment.

I must have died, Shizuru. I must have died somewhere between this last month and now. This is my next life. And I swear to you….in my heart, but you can hear my heart. I swear I will never be without again.

As whispering hearts do speak, Shizuru's thoughts spoke, no, almost sang to her love's wish and want.

And I you. Forever….always…I love you, Natsuki.

Mini Feed

Mai: -cries- that is so beautiful. -Hugs Kara- I'm not screwing Natsuki anymore...and I'm back to be straight...right????

Kara: -coughs- I'm not going...-mumbles-

Mai: NANI!!!

Natsuki: -full on blush- Ne, Shizuru...do you want to go and see a movie with me?

Shizuru: -grins- NO, but I'd like to go somewhere else with you.

-Mai goes green-

Mai: Oh man...lesbians...-barfs-

Kara: -nosebleed- Hot lesbians...hehehehe

-Kara sneaks out-

Again, thank you as alway for enduring my story. I apologize for disrupting the beautiful union of Shiznat-dom. I tried my best to right my evil wrong. And with this story done with I am happy to say I am almost done with another. Please do review...leave me hate mail too. I like anything I get. I'm easy like that -grins- anyhow

THANK YOU FOR REVIEWING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!