Summary: Billy Numerous never woke up before noon and the H.I.V.E Five want to know why. Friendship fic between the H.I.V.E Five; mostly Billy Numerous and Kyd Wykkyd though.
Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans
Pairings: slight Jinx/See-More
Warnings: Slight angst, some language and humour
Winter-Rae: This is like my fourth one shot. Don't worry, one day I'm sure I'll write an actual story, maybe? But I do have a lot on the go now. I want to try and get some of them finished. Seriously folks never start like 8 stories at a time, it never works out. Anyway it's Billy Numerous time! Enjoy this!
It was really a rare thing for all of the members of the H.I.V.E Five to have breakfast together. They all had their own agendas and schedules. Jinx was an early riser, always had been and always would be; usually rolling out of bed at around 6:00 in the morning. No one else in the group understood this, seeing sun rises was never their thing, sunsets on the other hand they were up for.
Next to wake up was usually See-More at around 6:30 or 6:45, once he heard Jinx was up he was alert and ready. Gizmo came after as he would be awaken by Jinx yelling at See-More over making her jump while she was trying to make her breakfast. Gizmo would leave his room and snap at them about waking him up and then fix himself a bowl of cereal and chow down.
Since the noise level had been kicked up a few notches this drove Kyd Wykkyd to leave his room and listen to them have their morning arguments. He didn't crave the fighting words, just the sound of others being around him. The others were aware of his 'phobia', not that he would call it that, and tolerated it. They mostly just found silly things to fight about in order to keep the teleporter calm. Seeing someone who couldn't speak in a lot of distress bothered them all.
Then Mammoth would get out of bed around 9:00 and fix himself a huge breakfast. He was a breakfast man all around. The others were sure that he would have breakfast for every meal of the day if he could. When it came to their wise cracking, duplicating, Southern team mate Billy Numerous. Well you were lucky to see him up and out of bed around noon or so.
So you see breakfast together was never really an option. Not that it bothered them. Sometimes they just wanted a light breakfast like toast or a bagel. If other's wanted something bigger, bacon, eggs, the whole lot; then they did it. Lunch and dinner was different as they always all sat down together, unless of course Jinx was annoyed with them again. Then it was normally just the guys but she would always come out and at least have some dessert with them.
For lunch and dinner they worked out a timetable for the week for who would cook when and what. It was mostly so they knew if they would have to get groceries the day before or if someone else wanted to offer to take the other's place and make the meal. The timetable was posted on the fridge so anyone who went to it would see it and know that they were on meal duty that day. Or curse about forgetting that they were.
They had all sat down and discussed how it would go too. Jinx, who loved to cook, was responsible for lunches on Monday and Thursday. She usually came up with something interesting and new for them to eat. Kyd Wykkyd, who had a knack in the kitchen, took Monday's dinner and Tuesday's lunch. He believed that if he didn't do meals back to back he would forget about it and didn't want to upset anyone. People pleaser as he was.
Mammoth always made breakfast foods for whatever meal he did which was dinner on Tuesday and Friday. Everyone always looked forward to his cooking. Now when it came to See-More he loved to experiment. But he was, in all honesty, a horrible cook. So when dinner time Wednesday and Thursday rolled around people tried to make themselves as busy as possible to avoid his cooking, he was oblivious to it of course.
When Gizmo's time came around, dinner on Wednesday, it was always take-out. The only good thing about it was that it was always a different take-out. Because let's face it, Chinese is great once in a while but every day would make anyone sick. He always was careful when ordering too and made sure that everyone got their proper order. If you got an egg roll instead of your Won Ton soup he would fix it, which usually meant bad news for the delivery guy.
Since Saturday and Sunday were pretty much a free for all, a.k.a. Make Your Crud-Munching Selves Your Own Food Day. Billy's day was the last possibility; lunch on Friday. This normally was fine and dandy with everyone as Billy was a really great cook. Fried Chicken, homemade biscuits, mashed potatoes, awesome gravy, green beans with apple pie and ice cream were the food on the menu last week. Needless to say they were eating leftovers for a while.
Lunches that day were always a little late too as the multiplying Southerner was never, ever up before noon. Of course he was never up before noon on any given day so you couldn't expect too much from him. But he always came through with something amazing and would tell them with a chuckle that you couldn't rush a cooking genius and that waiting for food was better because it tasted that much better afterwards.
Last week was a good week in that the H.I.V.E Five had been busy with a lot of heists and clean getaways. So, not wanting to ruin their lucky streak they kept going and not really worrying about who was cooking what and when they were doing it. When having a good stealing streak like this; eating was usually far from their minds and they would only eat something quick and easy to make.
When this week rolled around the others were growing concerned. As Billy had been absent from the table and the common room for most of it. This was something that never happened unless of course the word had come to an end or something silly like that. And as far as they knew the Titans hadn't been causing too much trouble from that aspect so they were safe.
The others had grown accustomed to Billy's fun loving nature and his cheery hillbilly voice, so the odd silence bothered them. See-More was staring blankly at the wall, Jinx was building a house of cards, Gizmo and Mammoth appeared to be having a staring contest but since they were both spaced out neither of them was winning. Kyd Wykkyd on the other hand was growing nervous and agitated as he usually did in quiet situations so he left the oddly quiet room in search of the ever chatting young man.
He banged on Billy's door and mentally kicked himself after he did. He checked the clock and let out a silent sigh of relief. Billy had been very honest with them and said that if anyone ever woke him up before noon he couldn't be held accountable for whatever injuries they might sustain in the process. However the clock read 1:00 in the afternoon so Kyd was safe from Billy's wrath. The silent teleporter wasn't even sure if Billy did 'wrath' but he also didn't feel like finding out.
When no response came after two minutes he tried again. He heard shuffling coming from the room now. This relieved Kyd as soon he would be able to have a one sided conversation with many Billy's. Billy's door slid open allowing Kyd to enter the room. To his surprise it was very neat and clean, something he didn't expect from Billy. He looked over to the bed and seen a lump which appeared to be moving.
Kyd raised a confused eyebrow. He walked over to the bed and poked the lump until it let out a moan.
"Go away," it said, "Leave me be."
Kyd cocked his head to the side and stood looking down at the lump which was now muttering in annoyance.
"There's only one person in this here house who can be so gull darn quiet!"
Billy threw off his blankets and glared at Kyd who was smiling at hearing him talk.
"They not talkin' to ya again?" he asked. Kyd held up four fingers with his left hand pointed to them with his right and then held a finger to his lips. Billy nodded. In Kyd's language that meant no one was talking to anyone.
"What's the time?"
Kyd passed him his clock. Billy looked at it and yawned.
"Guess I'm a little late with lunch," he muttered as he got out of bed dressed in a wife beater and boxers. He stretched, yawned and scratched his head which was covered with shaggy brown hair.
"Okay Kyd I'm a comin'," he said, "Just let me get dressed."
Kyd nodded and left the room. He only had to endure three minutes of silence before Billy appeared at his side. Still looking a little tired but ready to start the day.
"So Kyd, how'd ya sleep last night?"
"Yeah 'bout the same with me," Billy replied as he stretched again, "I'm still beat."
Kyd frowned and pointed at the clock which now read 1:22. Billy waved him off.
"No need to get your underwear in a bunch," he said, "I know it's late, doesn't mean I'm not still tired."
Kyd cocked his head to the side and then held up his hand lifting up one finger at a time and then pointing to Billy.
"What?" Billy asked, "One of me not enough for ya?"
Kyd shook his head, indicating that was not what he meant. He pointed to the clock and then back to his hand which was again lifting up a finger at a time and pointing to Billy who sighed.
"You've lost me Kyd," he said, "If this is about lunch I'm gonna go and make it right now."
Kyd shook his head and threw up his hands in frustration. Billy chuckled.
"Okay Kyd let's try this again," he said, "So it's now 1:30."
Kyd nodded lifted up a finger at a time and pointed to Billy. The Southerner tapped his chin trying to figure out what his quiet friend wanted.
"You wanna know why it's just me?"
Kyd nodded. Billy laughed, he got it now.
"So you wanna know why I don't have any other Billy's out here and it's already 1:30 in the afternoon because usually I have more out here by now."
Kyd nodded again grinning. Billy shrugged.
"Well Kyd, I'm just too tired right now."
Kyd smacked his forehead; that obviously wasn't the answer he wanted. When they entered the common room the others all bombarded Billy with, essentially, the same question Kyd Wykkyd had asked. Billy waved them off with a laugh.
"No worries," he said, "Sorry I over slept, I'll get started on lunch right now. What'll it be?"
"Who cares," Mammoth said, "Just make something."
"You got it!" Billy said, three copies of himself appeared and they all started to work on a light lunch as Mammoth had a large dinner planned. Kyd frowned. Didn't Billy just say he was too tired to make any copies of himself? Yet here he was running around with three other copies. While one worked on grilling some chicken, another was working on making a Caesar salad, the third making homemade Caesar salad dressing while the original started to set the table with Kyd Wykkyd's help.
"What are you making?" Gizmo asked. The original Billy stretched and yawned again.
"Chicken Caesar salad," he replied, "You want anythin' else with it?"
"No that's okay Billy," Jinx said as she caught Kyd's eye. Apparently she had noticed Billy's exhaustion and didn't want him to over do it.
"I could make some Jell-o," Billy said, "There's always room for Jell-o."
"Chill Billy," Jinx said, "There's ice cream in the freezer, you spoil us."
"Gotta keep that energy up!" Billy chirped, "Especially if we run into those Titans."
"That's right!" the one working on the chicken said. He had appeared to be finished as he was now cutting it up and placing it in the salad. The dressing had just been finished too and was now set on the table. When making a salad for all of the H.I.V.E Five you never added the dressing before hand. That was World War 3 waiting to happen as Gizmo only liked a little bit of dressing while Jinx loved to drown her salad in it. Kyd Wykkyd grabbed a bottle of Coke and set it down along with the milk, juice and Pepsi.
"Get that crap out of here!" See-More joked pointing to the Coke bottle. Kyd Wykkyd frowned at him. The never ending battle over which was better, Pepsi or Coke, always happened between him and See-More. While he was a Coke lover, even Billy sided with him on that one, See-More and Gizmo loved Pepsi. Even though Jinx wasn't sure the caffeine was good for the short tech wizard. Mammoth drank milk with ever meal while Jinx preferred juice or iced water.
"Don't ya'll start now," Billy said, "Don't worry Kyd they say Pepsi messes with your mind makin' you go insane. So we're safe with the Coke."
"Whatever you snot-licking hillbilly," Gizmo retorted. Billy laughed and slapped his knee. Kyd smiled but still was wondering what was up with Billy. Sure he was always upbeat but this was a little much even for him. Maybe this was how he was then he was over tired. In any case they all sat down and enjoyed their lunch; it was awesome, as usual. After it was done and the dishes were put away Jinx started to go over the plans for their next heist.
"There's a new diamond exhibit at the museum downtown," she said showing them an outline of the museum, "Since it's closed today so they can prepare for the grand opening tomorrow today is the best chance to get them."
"Smash and grab job is it?" Billy joked. Jinx rolled her eyes.
"Slightly more complicated then that scum-brain," Gizmo retorted. Billy shrugged, unfazed. Jinx went over the rest of the details and soon they were off. They arrived at the museum and decided to go in the back way. Kyd Wykkyd tapped Billy on the shoulder.
"What now Kyd?"
Kyd pointed to Billy and using what little sign language he knew the others would get he asked if Billy was okay. Billy shrugged.
"I'm fine," he said, "Ya'll just stay out trouble this time."
This time? What did he mean by that? Kyd nodded and followed the others in.
"Perfect," Jinx said, "No one around; I'll take care of the guards on the second floor you boys do your thing."
"She's a regular firecracker that one," Billy said, "Well boys I feel like a kid in a candy store."
"Soon you're all gonna be in jail!"
"It's those crud-munching Titans!" Gizmo snapped, "How did they find us so fast?"
Robin and his team exchanged looks.
"You guys drove right by us," Beast Boy said, "The pizza place."
"See-More, you snot-head!"
"Guess we just got cocky," Billy said, "Oh well nothing Billy Numerous can't handle."
After four more Billy's appeared they all scattered to try and fight off the Titans.
"This is the eighth heist you've done," Robin said to Kyd Wykkyd, "You should have quit while you were ahead."
Kyd frowned as Robin started to come at him. Kyd's hand to hand combat was alright but no where nearly as good as the Boy Wonder's. He teleported behind Robin but the titan leader saw through that move and aimed a kick at his head.
"Watch yourself there boy!"
One of the Billy's had popped up and blocked the kick for his friend. He grinned and knocked Robin's other foot out from under him. The clone suddenly stopped and was jerked back into the original Billy just like the others.
"I'm out fellas," Billy said panting and falling to his knees. Kyd was at his side in an instant helping to steady him.
"Guys, let's go!" Jinx yelled, she had appeared during the fight and was ready with the keys of a car they could escape in. Kyd disappeared with Billy and re-appeared in the parking lot as they others joined them. They got into the car and took off at full speed.
Once back at their place Jinx was yelling at Billy who was sprawled out on the sofa.
"Why didn't you tell us you were tired!" she said, "I would have let you stay behind for a rest you know."
"Who would have givin' ya'll back up then?" Billy asked looking up at her, "Kyd nearly got nailed by Boy Wonder, you guys needed me."
"We need you yes but not when you can hardly stand up," Jinx shot back, "With you down they could have easily gotten you and taken you to jail! What then huh?"
Billy cast his head down and sighed.
"I just had to be there is all," he said, "If somethin' happened to any of you guys it'd be my fault for not givin' ya the back up ya needed."
Jinx sighed and looked at Kyd who was smiling thoughtfully.
"Billy you do to much man," See-More said, "We're big kids now."
"Yeah and if you went to jail it would be way too quiet around here," Gizmo muttered, while he was trying to hide it he was also worried about the young man. Mammoth smirked.
"Who would keep Kyd occupied if you weren't here?" he asked. Kyd nodded in agreement, then when he caught on to the joke he glared at Mammoth and started to jab his finger angrily at him while waving his other arm threateningly.
"No need to yell there Kyd," Billy said with a grin.
"You just should have told us Billy," Jinx said seriously, "We might not be goodie goods like the Titans but we are a team. We look out for each other."
Billy looked up at her and smirked.
"I knew you wanted me," he said. She growled and threw up her arms in frustration. Kyd smacked his forehead and looked at Billy. He pointed to him and then to the rest of them and then held his hands together tightly.
"Come again?" See-More asked.
"He said that we're a family," Jinx said. Kyd nodded. He pointed to Billy again and then shook his head.
"I know, I know," Billy said waving him off, "I sure know how to ruin a moment right?"
Kyd nodded again and then pointed in the direction of the bedrooms. Billy pushed himself to his feet and trudged off muttering under his breath.
"Who knew someone who can't even talk could be so darn pushy!"
Winter-Rae: How can you not love the H.I.V.E Five? I like the idea of Billy always keeping an eye out for the others with his copies during a fight and that's why he would be so tired. Billy Numerous is awesome. He makes me laugh. "Well butter my backside and call me a biscuit!" I laughed so hard at that! Oh! Does anyone reading this know Spanish at all? I wrote a Mas and Menos one shot but before I can post it I need some help with the translations. Or if someone knows a REALLY accurate translation website could you please let me know! Anyway thanks for reading. Cheers!