I Will Find You
SUPER LATE CHAP I KNOW!
But yeh…you don't wanna hear my excuses you just wanna read right? Right…? Heh…oh…
Well…after the incredibly long hours, the lawsuit, the thousands of dollars on legal representation AND the entirely new level of frustration found I AM STILL NOT OWNING NARUTO! Or on that note…Sasuke either… : (
But anyway…I GIVE YOU, the ONE the ONLY the FINAL CHAPTER… CHAPTER 15 - Wordless Confessions
"Ok, try to keep him awake until the ambulance comes. Can you do that?" The lady asked kindly.
"Um…yeh…" Naruto moved the phone away again. "Sasuke?" The boy shook the raven's already shaking form, letting out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding when pale eyelids flickered open, revealing tired, dark orbs.
"I know you want to sleep Sasuke but you have to stay awake ok?" Naruto moved up a little to touch the boys face gently. "Sasuke? Are you with me?"
"Yeh…" He replied weakly, Naruto having to lean in to catch what he said.
"Just stay awake ok? For me, alright Sasuke?"
The raven gave a barely noticeable nod and Naruto flashed him a feeble smile.
"It'll be alright." the blonde murmured to Sasuke, keeping their eyes locked. The faint sound of sirens approaching made Naruto look up and he pulled the receiver back to his mouth.
"The paramedics are here now, thank you so much." He hung up and applied more pressure onto Sasuke's wound, not daring to check the damage.
"Help is here Sasuke, see? Hear the sirens?"
Sasuke slowly gazed out the window.
The blonde could tell he wasn't really all there but he was awake and alive and for that, Naruto couldn't be happier.
Believe it or not, Naruto had only ever been in a hospital once in his life. He remembered it as an old, tacky place, big as an airport with an odd smell that lingered in every corner and would follow you around for days afterward.
It hadn't even been him admitted, he had joined his friend for moral support who was visiting their father, being just diagnosed with cancer.
It was the same hospital. Same dark, old carpeting on the ground floor. Same shotty, creaking lift. Same stuffy, closed in corridors. Except this time, instead of a middle aged man sitting up in a depressing hospital bed, was a handsome young teenager lying on his back, eyes closed, oxygen mask over his mouth.
Naruto sighed heavily and ran a tan hand through his unruly locks. He didn't want to be in this place, it made him feel cornered and small. It was as if the tiny, unfriendly room with its cold machines and plastic plants was trying to suffocate him. But he pushed down the voice in his head screaming at him to leave, he swallowed the growing panic rising from his gut and took a seat next to the bed.
"Sasuke…" Naruto whispered fondly, taking the boy's lifeless hand and rubbing it gently.
The raven had been unconscious for a while and every stir or groan would cause Naruto's heart to jump in excitement and rush to his side only to find the boy still asleep and he would go back to pacing the room or dozing in his chair.
Naruto had only left once in the day and a half he had been in the hospital and that was just for the bathroom. He hadn't eaten anything in days. But now that he thought about it, it had been nearly four days and about the same for a drink. The blonde was starting to regret not taking Sasuke's offer for something back at his house…
His stomach was aching and he felt weak and a bit-light headed if he stood up too quick, the bruising on his body from Deidara's beating near three days ago were still incredibly tender but Naruto sucked it up.
That was nothing to what Sasuke felt…
Sighing again and running a hand wearily down his face, Naruto lowered himself gingerly into the chair, curling up on the hunger pangs and closed his eyes.
Sasuke woke groggily, his eyes felt like they had been almost glued shut and his hot breath sitting in the mask on his face was already annoying him. He went to take the stupid thing off but his arms felt incredibly heavy so he started silently stretching the muscles till he felt strong enough.
While working on that, he took in his surroundings. Dark mauve walls, a watercolour landscape painting, a small window next to him, a chair and…
"Naruto…" He whispered, eyes softening as they fell on the boy curled in the chair, mouth slightly open and drooling a little.
Commanding his arms to move, the raven pulled the mask down around his neck and grabbed hold of the side of the bed. Straining his aching back and using the strength of one arm to pull himself up, (A/N the glass pierced his hand remember?) Sasuke leaned over the edge and brushed his hand through slightly oily locks.
Naruto stirred a little and with a loud exhale through his nose, he blearily opened his large blue eyes.
"Sa…Sasuke??" Naruto's breath caught in his throat looking up at the pale skinned angel leaning over him.
Like a startled rabbit he shot up and hugged the boy he realised he'd loved for life. The world spun around him from the hasty move and Naruto released Sasuke and shook his head, trying to shake away the sudden vertigo.
"You're alright…" Sasuke breathed, almost smiling up at the blonde.
"I'm alright?" Naruto shouted, "You got stabbed! How can you think of me at a time like this! Your unbelievable!" There were tears in the blonde's eyes and his voice shook with emotion, trying to hold it all in.
Sasuke cupped the other boy's face in his hands and pulled him in for a kiss. Naruto's eyes widened as their lips touched, then slowly closed as one hand found Sasuke's hair and the other lightly traced his neck. They broke away slowly, no tongue had been involved, the moment was too pure for that and they were now lost in each others eyes.
"I'd been so scared…" Naruto said quietly, blushing slightly. "I really thought…you'd died."
"It'll take more than that to kill me, Naruto." Sasuke said, the corner of his lips twitching upwards.
"It's not funny!" Naruto yelled half-heartedly. "I'm so relieved you bastard. Don't ever do anything so stupid again."
"I dunno." Sasuke said seriously, looking away.
"What do you mean 'you don't know'!?" Naruto shouted, angry this time. He was worried to death about his idiotic best friend/love and he was thinking about a next time!
"When it comes to you…I'd do it all over again. In a heartbeat."
Sasuke looked up at Naruto who's mouth was slightly ajar in shock, who then snapped it shut and turned away. "Don't be stupid…" He mumbled.
Sasuke just smiled and stared at the back of Naruto's head. He had been worried too. The clear imprint of his brothers fingers were still a vivid purple black around his love's throat and Sasuke was sure Naruto was hurting too.
"Hey Sasuke…" Naruto said quietly.
"Remember when we were kids…" The blonde turned around and leant on the foot of the bed. "When we would spar? You'd beat me pretty much within an inch of my life…then you'd help me up."
"Yeah I remember that." Sasuke smiled, "You never could fight."
"Shut up teme." Naruto retorted distractedly, "But then…when you left me…even when you made me rethink everything I had defined myself by…" Naruto took in a shuddering breath, "when I doubted everything I'd done that had gotten me where I am now…when you saw my suffering yet did nothing…I thought…I thought I hated you."
"Dobe…" Sasuke started.
"Though I could never bring myself to hate you, because then I would be lost." Naruto said as if stating a fact and moved away from the bed, in his own world so it seemed. "It was like…that sense of wanting to hate you tied me down, like I was caught in a raging river and you were the tree I held on to that stopped me being swept away." Another deep breath, "They say…everyone always said I was too forgiving, you know?"
Naruto locked eyes with Sasuke who was shocked to see his blonde's eyes dangerously watering. He smiled shakily and continued.
"Even so…it's my nature. Hell…when it came to you, there was nothing I couldn't forgive. I can't help but be who I am Sasuke, but if I could change it would be only for you."
"You know I'd never want you to change from who you are Naruto." Sasuke quickly cut in. The blonde's train of thought was scaring him, he didn't want to see him like this but Naruto held up his hand, silently telling his friend to let him finish.
"Where can I start?"
"Sasuke, I want to become what you need."
"I already need you Naruto…I always have." Sasuke reached out to his old friend and the tanned youth gently ran a hand down the pale face. "I'm stronger than I ever thought I could be and it's all thanks to you. Our experiences made me who I am now and because of that I don't regret anything. Not anymore."
Sasuke leant into Naruto's touch, clutching his arm almost desperately as if afraid the blonde boy would fade away at any moment.
"All the things you told me Sasuke…I remember every word. When we were children I loved the sound of your voice…so smooth and deep for such an age. Even when I didn't want to hear it, I listened. Pathetic huh?"
Sasuke, by now, knew Naruto was feeling vulnerable and didn't interrupt. Instead giving him silent comfort, his hand now over Naruto's.
"Maybe things aren't as simple as right and wrong after all. What I think of right may be wrong in your eyes. But then, complex or not…I'm sure we'd figure it out. What do they say? Problems don't seem as big when you share them. But there are still so many things to apologise for…" Naruto shook his head sadly, "I wasn't there for you when you needed me and I shouldn't have questioned your reasons…I should have known you would never truly betray me like that."
"It's my fault too." Sasuke said softly, his voice laced with the faint beginnings of desperation. "It's all my fault. I was the one who wasn't there for you Naruto! Nothing was you, it was all me. With Deidara…and…Itachi…I should of…I …"
Naruto lifted Sasuke's chin and stared into his now teary obsidian depths, softly running his hand along the pale skin.
"I never gave up on you…not completely. I will admit I had my times of doubt, when I thought you would never…we would…never be friends again. But there was always hope somewhere…as painful as it was to hold onto. I just kept telling myself…you weren't like that - you wouldn't abandon me without good reason…not the Sasuke I know. I think we all like to paint a picture of what we want or need but the true art is being able to distinguish which is real…and which is just an illusion."
Naruto dropped his hand and approached the small window. It was mid-afternoon and a cool change was racing through the courtyard below. People held closed their coats as the wind raced through them, blowing their hair in their face and scattering faded autumn leaves across the ground.
"There were always too many words…too many I wanted to say and too little you actually said. Actions speak so much louder don't you think? You proved that back with Itachi and Deidara too."
Naruto didn't turn away from the window, his eyes glassy, distant and unseeing - reflecting the weak sunlight filtering into the small room.
"It's amazing how little control we have over things. I had this picture…in my head, of me protecting you, keeping you away from Deidara and well…everything. But even in the midst of chaos, I still managed to put my hope in you. Let's face it…I didn't have anyone else."
"Dobe," Sasuke said fondly. "You have me. You always had and always will, you know that."
"To this day, I still have no idea why." Naruto turned away from the window to face the slightly confused raven. If he heard what Sasuke said, he didn't show it. "But why isn't important…reasons, mistakes, results aren't important…you are. I realise that now but there are still so many things I never said…I know you know I felt that way, but it's not the same…You needed to hear it too."
Naruto slowly padded over to the bed, half sitting on the side, his hand on Sasuke's.
"Now I wait…time is meaningless, indifferent to my wants…but still, I stay. I'll stay. For you." Naruto squeezed his hand softly. "Take the good with the bad they say…and sometimes that's easier said than done. But with you I can make an exception."
Naruto grinned slightly and Sasuke shakily let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. "Still with that smart mouth I see."
Naruto smirked and lightly punched his arm. "You forced me not to rely on you…but in the end, it only made me need you more." Smile slipping only slightly, Naruto laughed, a sad, hollow sort of sound. "We were both as blind as each other huh? Amazing what it took to open our eyes…a few bangs to the head, a stab here and a beating there…but what am I talking about?"
He grinned in that foxy way Sasuke went absolutely crazy for and the raven pulled the blonde down onto him, closing his eyes and losing himself entirely in this boy.
They finally pulled away, Sasuke ignoring the aching protests in every part of his body. Naruto was blushing and panting a little. With what, Sasuke wasn't too sure but he really liked his fox in red.
"T…teme…" Naruto panted shakily until Sasuke cupped his face in his hands and brought them close.
"Shut up and kiss me Naruto."
And there it is, my very FIRST Naruto fanfic : ) Hope you liked it!
Thank you to everyone who kept me writing and the lovely words, I know the ending isn't too great..but I had a lot of fun writing it.
I might get that other one I was talking about started soon.
Thanks again everyone!