Our Icha Icha Paradise
Summery: In which, the boys of the rookie 9 are sent on an away mission where they must live together in a perverted house known as 'The Icha Icha House'. Fluffyness ensues, with late night drinking, pranking, movies, vandalism, and general tomfoolery. Pairings all around with; Sasuke/Naruto, Lee/Gaara, Shikamaru/Neji, and Shino/Kiba.
Disclaimer: I disclaim wholeheartedly.
AN: The first chapter of a new fic, to be long one. Basically just light, fluffy, humerous yaoi in a free-range setting. Living together, there will be much yaoi goodness to be had between the various pairings. I hope you all enjoy, here is the first chap which just sets the story up. Do review and let me know what you think!
Chapter 1: The Strangely Appealing House of Icha Icha Paradise
"Excuse me?" Uchiha Sasuke asked snidely, eyebrows raised in obvious contempt as he regarded the woman sitting at the large oak desk in front of him, "I don't think I heard you properly through all the bullshit you just spouted."
Tsunade sighed irritably, frowning at the dark-haired young Uchiha. She should have expected that kind of reaction from him, but at least Naruto seemed to be taking it well -
"This is shit!" Uzumaki Naruto exclaimed, "Fuck this! I'm not doing it!"
- Strike that. His reaction was much worse.
"You will not be the only ones to go on this mission," She told them calmly, appeasing, "Sabaku no Gaara and Kankurou will be joining you in this mission, as representatives of Sunagakure." She gestured to the two nins who stood off to the side.
"Gaara!" Naruto yelled in a desperate tone, "You don't wanna do this either, right?"
Sabaku no Gaara regarded the blonde with careful measure, his pale-green eyes training on bright blue as he nonchalantly shrugged, "I came of my own accord," The red-head replied, "To join Konoha on this mission."
"I was dragged along." Kankurou contributed, his voice depressed.
"GAH!" Naruto wailed in frustration.
As the Hokage of Konohagakure, it was, of course, her duty to tell the ninja of the village of these kinds of plans, especially when they would be primarily involved in the proceedings. Diplomacy between the countries was running low as of the last few years though, and drastic measures needed to be taken.
Unfortunately, these drastic measures required the co-operation of their promising young ninja, which were currently assembled in the Hokage's office, mixed reactions plain on their faces as they stood facing Tsunade.
"Surely this is not necessary." Hyuuga Neji argued, eyes a little pleading, and his voice sounding slightly more desperate than he would ever admit to.
Aburame Shino nodded his agreement, shifting a little uncomfortably in his overly-large coat, the only sign of his disagreement at the idea of Tsunade-sama's plan.
"How troublesome." Nara Shikamaru intoned, leaning against the right wall of the office, looking thoroughly bored and mildly irritated at the whole discussion.
Tsunade sighed once again, "This is necessary." She told them, "Diplomatic missions are-"
"A complete waste of time!" Inuzuka Kiba growled, having been sulking next to Shino since Tsunade had announced the mission they would be going on, and now pent up with enough frustration to vent his feelings on the matter, "I'm not going to some foreign country, like Kirigakure or some shit, just because they're unsure whether or not Konoha wants to be friends with them!"
"Perhaps you don't realise," Tsunade snapped back at him, "That this is not a suggestion, its an order!"
"You can stick your order up your-" Kiba began, before Shino promptly silenced him, slapping his hand over the canine-boy's mouth, and bringing an arm around his shoulders to restrain him.
Tsunade bristled at Kiba's near-insult, but everyone's brooding feelings were quickly interrupted by an unusually cheerful voice;
"Come now, my youthful friends!" Rock Lee chirped at them all, his smile broad and his gaze determined, "We can complete this mission, if we all work together with our youth! YOSH!"
Sasuke scowled at the green-clad boy, "Shut up, you hyperactive idiot!"
"Enough!" Tsunade bellowed, and all eyes turned to her once again, "Sasuke, Naruto, Neji, Shikamaru, Lee, Shino, Kiba, Gaara, Kankurou. You have all been chosen for this mission because of you're dedication to Konoha, and your status as outstanding young ninja... with the possible exception of Naruto."
"But I digress," She continued, ignoring Naruto's indignant pout, "Konoha has hit rough times with the other countries. You all are to be sent out of Konoha, to complete several separate diplomatic relations missions with powerful countries. Of course, it would be unwise to have you all split up over different countries where it would be harder to reach you, should we need you, so you will all be staying at the same place."
"The same place?" Neji asked incredulously, "You have a secure location in another country in which we may stay?"
"Not quite." Tsunade answered, happy that at least the conversation seemed to be turning towards the actual mission, "Jiraiya, another of the three legendary Sannin, owns a house in uncharted territory some distance from the Fire Country, which is hardly ever used. Arrangements have been made, and it has been decided that this is the most secure location for you all to stay in."
"Eh?" Naruto asked, "Ero-sennin's house?"
Kiba glared suspiciously at Tsunade, "I've never seen this house."
"Of course not, baka!" Tsunade scolded, "Its location is secret, which is why it is ideal for your mission. Perhaps you've heard of it, as it is... affectionately nicknamed 'The Icha Icha House'."
The eight boys looked taken aback.
"EH?!" Naruto wailed.
"I'm not staying in some perverted house!" Sasuke yelled, his voice raised for the first time through out the discussion, his eyes wide with disbelief.
"Completely unacceptable!" Neji declared, shaking his head wildly.
Lee merely stood still, blushing brightly at the idea of staying in a house named after a notoriously famous series of pornographic books.
Shino also spoke up for the first time in the discussion, "I do not think my father would approve..."
"I don't fucking approve!" Kiba's muffled yell came from behind Shino's hand.
Gaara's eyes even looked a little wider than normal. In fact, the only positive responses came from Shikamaru and Kankurou, who were smirking and snickering, respectively.
The current Hokage-sama glared, 'Time to get serious,' She thought, 'Plan B it is.'
"I guess its too bad then," Tsunade sighed dejectedly, her face taking on a falsely contemplative expression, "And you were all going to get two months off of normal duties to stay at the Icha Icha House too, where you would spend the majority of you're time doing as you wish... enjoying you're youth..."
Lee perked up immediately.
"... meditating any time you please in the private dojo..."
Neji's eyes brightened at the thought, while Sasuke considered all the time away from a certain annoying dobe he could spend in there.
"... enjoying the living room's entertainment system..."
Naruto and Kiba quickly became quiet, filled with sudden interest.
"... perhaps venture out into the wild life of the forest surrounding the house..."
Shino thought instantly of the rare foreign specimens he could add to his collection.
"... enjoying the lush green grass and clear sky you can see for miles..."
Shikamaru could only fantasise of all the cloud-watching he could be doing.
"... Or maybe just spending some time inside, talking over dinner like the friends you all are..."
Gaara felt himself suddenly stand straight, wishing emphatically that he could spend time with his friends that he rarely got to see these days.
"But alas," Tsunade wailed over-dramatically, "You simply will not comply! I supposed I'll have to scrap the whole mission, or perhaps I will send Sakura and her friends to the house, I'm sure the girls would appreciate this wonderful opportunity-"
"WAIT!" The room suddenly resounded with the unanimous cries of all the boys in the office, who rushed forward to lean over the Hokage's desk in their desperate enthusiasm.
"We'll do it!" Kiba exclaimed.
"Definitely!" Sasuke agreed, eyes wide and pleading.
"I'm in." Gaara declared quietly, while all the others simply nodded their compliance.
Tsunade grinned maliciously at them all. 'Too easy', she thought.
"Wonderful!" She proclaimed happily, "Well, all of you go pack you're things and set off immediately, no time to waste, you must leave for that almost-holiday you have waiting!"
All the boys seemed to thoroughly agree with this, as Kankurou exclaimed, "She's right! We have to get going NOW!"
And with that, the nine boys took off, rushing out of the office with barely contained excitement as they all went to their homes to pack up and leave. Tsunade smirked triumphantly when they were gone.
'At least this will be good for their spirits.' She thought, as she then turned her thoughts towards more pressing matters.
'Now, where did Shizune hide that sake...'
A/N: So what are the thoughts? Like the beginning? I know it wasn't terribly eventful, but it will improve vastly once they get to the house in the next chap, don't you worry about that :D