Yet another Ikka/Yumi one shot! These two are just unbelievably fun to write. This one shot is all due to redqueens. They posted a comment on "The Kiss" about Byakuya and Yumichika sitting down for "tea and scones". The image tickled me pink, so I played with it.

Bleach and all associated characters are property of Kubo Tite.

All characters depicted in sexual situations are fictional and of the legal age of consent.


"How is everything, Ayasegawa-san? You have been well, I presume?" Byakuya lifted the teapot and skillfully filled two cups with steaming liquid, placing one in front of Yumichika before sipping on his own.

"Yes, I've been well. And yourself? Things here in Seireitei going smoothly?" Yumichika smiled politely and stirred a spoonful of sugar and a dash of milk into his tea. It had been quite a while since he had been able to sit down with the beautiful sixth division taichou. A late afternoon tea after work had become somewhat of a ritual for the two, but lately he had been assigned to the real world and was forced to forgo the looked-forward-to visits.

Byakuya nodded and looked out the window. "Nothing of substantial significance has occurred while you were away." Sipping his tea again, he turned to look at the man sitting in front of him. If there was anyone in the Gotei 13 that he could relate to, it was Yumichika. The seemingly flighty man was actually quite profound, and shared many of the same ideals and opinions as himself. He too, had grown to appreciate these quiet talks of theirs.

It had all started when Yumichika found out about Byakuya's relationship with a certain Abarai Renji. Yumichika had been with Renji's best friend and mentor, Ikkaku, for many years, and he thought it might benefit both Byakuya and himself if the two of them were to strike up some sort of friendship. So, he went to see the noble with the proposition of a quiet tea, which Byakuya politely accepted. Once they had gotten past the inevitable formalities, they were surprised to find that they actually had a lot in common. The minutes turned to hours and they both were rather surprised when Ikkaku and Renji burst through the door, demanding to know what was taking so long.

As soon as Yumichika and Ikkaku had returned to the Soul Society after their recent assignment, the former let his lover know he would be visiting Byakuya and immediately set out to locate his friend. A short while later, the two were seated comfortably in Byakuya's office, sipping jasmine tea and trying to catch up on the last few weeks.

"What of the real world? Anything interesting transpire there?" Byakuya raised an eyebrow and looked at Yumichika, who smiled again and swallowed a mouthful of tea before replying.

"Just the usual. When Ikkaku wasn't bickering or sparring with Kurosaki-kun, he was complaining about the lack of things to do." Yumichika smiled reflectively.

The faintest of smirks pulled at Byakuya's lips. Ikkaku and Renji were so alike, they could be brothers. "Yes, that sounds about right, considering it is Madarame-san we are speaking of." He paused for a second before asking, "How are things between the two of you?"

Yumichika placed his cup on its saucer and smiled softly. "Oh, we're doing fine. Ikkaku doesn't like to interact much while we're in the real world, so I suspect I have a few sleepless nights ahead of me." He rolled his eyes slightly but not before a pink blush spread across his cheeks.

When Byakuya felt his own face begin to flush, he quickly cleared his throat and raised his cup to his lips. After a moment he spoke quietly. "They really are quite alike, are they not?" He watched as a knowing smile spread across the other man's face.

"Yes, they are very similar, indeed," Yumichika replied.

The two men sat in silence as they drank the rest of their tea. Even though they weren't speaking, a warm sense of understanding passed between them. They were both proud, proper men whose lovers were about as brash and outspoken as humanly possible. They both found comfort in knowing that they shared some of the same trials and difficulties, along with the same joys of being with someone so carefree and bold.

Yumichika glanced out the window. "Speaking of Ikkaku and Abarai-san, what do you suppose they do when we meet like this?"

Byakuya tilted his head and appeared to think for a moment. "I suppose they try to beat each other silly with their little wooden swords," he said with another faint smirk.

Yumichika giggled behind his hand. "Ah, I suppose you're probably right, Kuchiki-taichou."


Meanwhile, in a field on the outskirts of Seireitei:


"Ah, Ikkaku-dono, I believe you've gone soft during your stay in the real world." Renji laughed and ducked just before the bald shinigami's fist could come into contact with his jaw.

"Shut it, Abarai. I'm not in the mood for your bullshit." Ikkaku lay back on the grass and took a swig from the bottle of sake he was holding. "You know I could kick your ass from here to Hueco Mundo if I used my Bankai." The two had been sparring for over an hour and both were sprawled out on the grassy hill, panting and out of breath.

Renji's eyes widened and he chuckled. "But that'll never happen. You're too damn worried that someone will find out about your Bankai. That's why I can heckle you all I want without getting killed in return." He grabbed the sake bottle and took a rather large chug.

Ikkaku glared at him and snatched the bottle back. "If I ever do decide to reveal my Bankai, you can be damn sure that your ass will be the first to experience it," he growled.

There was a brief moment of silence before both men broke into an uproar of laughter. After he could breathe again, Renji smacked his friend on the back, making him spray his mouthful of sake all over. "Shit, I missed ya, man."

Ikkaku wiped his chin with his sleeve. "Yeah, I got pretty bored without ya, too."

They settled back in the grass and stared at the clouds passing overhead. "So, Yumichika-san is having tea with Kuchiki-taichou, eh?" Renji propped himself up on one elbow and glanced over at the bald man next to him.

Ikkaku took another drink. "Yeah, I wonder what the hell they talk about for so long." He chuckled before adding, "I'm pretty sure they're not sharing fashion advice or anything."

Renji laughed and flopped back down on the ground. "Nah, they're probably complaining about being stuck with losers like us."

Ikkaku snorted. "Speak for yourself. I am not a loser." A clump of grass landed in his face and Renji's foot jabbed his shin. "Fuck, that hurt, asshole!"

The redhead smirked before suddenly getting quiet. "How did we ever end up with guys like them?" he asked softly.

Ikkaku looked at him curiously. "I don't know, but I'm not gonna sit around and wonder how I got so lucky. We're with them now, and what matters is keeping them, not trying to figure out how it happened in the first place."

Renji smiled appreciatively before mischief glinted in his eyes. "Speaking of getting lucky. You've been in the real world for what, three weeks? That's one hell of a stretch."

Ikkaku groaned and glared at him. "Yeah, yeah. Don't remind me, you ass." They both laughed.

"Well, it's been a while. What say we go find our better halves and see if they're done with their tea?" Renji winked at Ikkaku, who immediately jumped to his feet.

"That's the best damn idea you've had all day."