Title: Losing Sanity

Series: Stargate SG-1

Pairing: Sam/Jack

Spoilers: none that I can think of; open to any season really.

Summary: When things go wrong, sometimes losing yourself is best.

The tempo pounded throughout the place. Bodies were moving and swaying seductively with the beat. This is not the usual place where an air force officer like Samantha Carter would be found, but for tonight, it was her refuge. Returning from P2M-807, or Chonoir as the locals knew it, she was indulging in this distraction freely. The mission had been a hard one. It was always stressful, but this time, lives were lost in a senseless casualty. Moving in time with the rhythm, Sam tried to lose herself in the music. She tried to forget about what transpired on that planet. Dancing with some random stranger in a rather suggestive manner only fueled her desire for release. Today, she had come so close to losing the person that she cared for more than the universe itself. The time was lost on her as she grooved and drowned her thoughts in the noisy darkness of the club.

It had started out like any other mission really. The team gated to the planet, met with whoever was in charge and began negotiations for trade. The hitch this time was when the council was under attack from a sub terrorist group that wanted to overthrow the government. SG-1 was taken totally off guard. They hurried to place themselves in defensive positions, but they weren't quick enough. Teal'c had gotten several blasts off from his staff weapon when the renegade shot came out of nowhere. The bullet whizzed past Daniel's head and lodged itself directly into Jack. Sam shouted his name as she saw him fall. She ran over to his position and assessed what damage had been done. All she saw was the blood that had begun to ooze from the wound in his chest. She hurriedly gathered him together and shouted to retreat to the gate.

The wait in the infirmary was torture. They wouldn't know if Jack was in the clear until the next day. With tears threatening to fall, Sam all but ran from the room determined to get out of that place. It had hit to close to home for her. All the feelings that were buried deep down inside were bubbling to the surface and boiling over in her tears. She knew that this was the point she had to tell him everything. Damn the regulations. Sam went home and changed out of her BDUs and found herself dressing for a party. Almost on autopilot, she directed her car to this tiny place that had the music you could lose yourself in.

As she rocked her body back and forth to the beat, her hips swaying seductively, she realized that she could no longer run. The only thing she was doing was hiding behind the pounding bass and drowning her pain in drinks and random dances with strangers. After tonight, she would go to the infirmary and tell him. Screw everything that stood in their way. Love could transverse everything, right? Hurriedly she exited the club, eager to get the infirmary sooner than later. She had to know. Sam had to know that her Jack would be okay. That everything would be okay between them.

Entering the infirmary Sam saw no one around. Of course it was 3am, no one should be around save the few nurses on night duty. She closed the distance between her and the bed Jack was laying in. He looked so lifeless, so broken. Tears gathered in her eyes and she finally let them fall. Placing her hand in his, she lowered herself so that her lips were right next to his ear. Only a few words were needed at this point. 'I love you Jack, please wake up, I need you.'

The next day found Jack looking around groggily, demanding a nurse. Well, first he demanded for Carter, but she was in her lab. Janet quickly phoned for Sam, and she made it down to the infirmary in record time. The relief on her face was evident as she saw Jack awake. She sat down beside him on the bed, minding not to disturb his wound. Leaning her head on his shoulder, that was all that he needed to know that she missed him.

"Hey Sam," he whispered, her head popping up at the use of her first name. "Last night did you say what I thought I heard you say?"

Looking into his eyes, she smiled brightly. "Yes, thank you for coming back."

"With you here my angel, I could never leave. I love you too. You sure you want to take the next step?"

"I am sure, with all my heart. That was a close call, and I could never bear the thought of losing you with out you knowing all that I have for you." She said breathily.

"Same here. Say, when I break out of this joint, you up for maybe a night of relaxing at my place? You can assure Janet that I'll be well taken care of." He offered.

She playfully smacked his good arm. "Of course I'll be your nursemaid Jack, it's all part of taking care of each other."

They both smiled contentedly, both of them finally at peace with the other.