It's been ages since I wrote anything so if im a bit rusty just review and tell me, flames accepted! I'm always looking for ways to improve my writing. This story is a bit different for me my fav yaoi couple is sasuke and naruto but ... I thought I would be different

Disclaimer: I so obviously don't own naruto … well technically I bought a naruto doll… I mean figurine… I own that so yes I do own a naruto but not naruto


It had been a long exhausting mission but finally it had finished; Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura and Kakashi came to the bridge where they begin there missions and end them. It had been a long enduring journey to the land of rock to retrieve an ancient stolen scroll. Even for the four ANBU it was perilous, usually Sasuke would never go on such an important mission after the incident, but Tsunade trusted the reliable hands of the original squad seven.

Naruto turned to the three other shinobi and exclaimed energetically 'what a great mission the old hag will be happy, maybe we can go to the ramen bar and celebrate?!'

Sasuke looked utterly bored and said without emotion or a care 'not today Naruto'

'It's never today with you Sasuke, Sakura?' he looked hopefully towards Sakura. Sakura looked at the ground abashedly as Sasuke 'poofed' away

'Umm… im sorry Naruto it's mine and Lees anniversary, he said he would cook a youthful dinner… or die trying' Sakura gave a small laugh and walked off the bridge into Konoha. Naruto didn't even say anything to Kakashi just a hopeful look.

Kakashi sighed and answered 'I would love to go to ramen with you' Naruto beamed and jumped up then Kakashi continued and naruto's smile quickly disappeared 'but I have to report the mission and return the scroll to Hokage Tsunade, how about tomorrow?'

Naruto shook his head and walked slowly away, a few seconds later a 'poof' was heard as kakashi departed to the tower. Naruto sighed, another attempt at an alternative to a lonely night alone failed. Naruto made his way though the village, it was late and there was a rush of people before all the shops closed due to the oncoming rain. He made his way though the crowd his mood growing deeper and deeper in a selfless pit of desolation.

He felt so alone, all his life he had been rejected and shunned, now even the people he thought of as his friends were to busy to pay any attention to him. Then the small pitter-patter of rain started to fall around him.

How ironic he thought the weather decided to match my mood. Then in frantic rush around him someone ran into him, before he knew it he was knocked to the ground. There was a murmured 'bastard' before the offender rushed on. In his black mood his reflexes must have been down as he hit the ground his mind did not resister it until the splitting pain in his cheek woke him from his reverie.

He lay on his side on the muddy pavement, he hit his cheek first when he fell, his head bounced once before resting back on the ground. The crowd continued to pass by unaware or refusing to recognize the blonde fox boy lying on the pavement. He slowly righted himself and kept on walking to his lonely apartment not even wiping away the slow trickle of blood trailing down his face. Soon the rain hides his silent tears as he slowly drew closer to the desolate apartment he shared with only his own misery.

He slugged up the stairs leaving watery muddy tail behind him. His numb hands fumbled with the keys and finally with many an agitated growl the door to his small apartment opened. Although small the apartment was nothing to cough at, it was homely, made mostly of wood and the original paper doors. To Naruto it represented nothing but an empty life and a place he came only to eat, sleep and refresh before going back to the life as a shinobi.

Naruto peeled off the orange and black jacket and hung it on a hook and threw his weapons pouch in the corner next to the door and proceeded in leaving his sandals next to the raised floor. He went straight to the bath room and immediately poured a deep, hot bath.

Naruto peeled off his sopping wet clothes leaving them in a sodden heap on the ground and stepped carefully into the bath. Naruto lay there taking the warmth, he then set to the task of scrubbing off the mud and blood that was his and the blood of the others from the mission.

After he was sure that he was clean he was about to get out when he spotted the small razor that he used when he needed to shave. He picked it up and looked at it carefully; with a small twist the razor blade came free from the handle. It fell into the water; naruto retrieved it and looked at it tossing the handle aside. He placed it on his wrist and braced himself as he sliced it towards himself.

Naruto let out a hiss but it didn't hurt as much as he anticipated, he tried again but it hurt less. Again and again he cut up his wrist; still it didn't hurt, so he continued as the blood ran deeply. Naruto started on his other wrist then the blood flowing from one wrist to the next mixing and dripping into the bath.

It wasn't enough, naruto began to feel dizzy, well at least my body is feeling it as my mind is refusing to recognize it, he thought. He continued cutting and the blood flowed more and more. Black dots formed in front of his eyes and slowly he began to long for the inevitable death. Soon his body could take no more and he passed out slipping into the water, choking his lungs from the air the so desperately needed. The bath turned red and Naruto's lungs gave their last breath.

Naruto woke standing into a white abyss, to his left was a set of pearl stairs with golden railing leading far up. He made his way towards the stairs. As the first foot hit the bottom stair huge claws captured him around the waist and head and flung him back into a black void.

He stumbled up into a ready stance swinging wildly around to face the offender but no one was there. Then a huge fox head with black that ran from the nose up around the huge red eye up into the unseen ear emerged from the blackness.

Naruto neither flinched nor backed away, he had seen this face many times before in his nightmares, it haunted him when he left his mind unguarded

'Why?!' naruto shouted at it 'why won't you let me die?!'

The Kyuubi's top lip curled up as it growled lowly from it throat 'because, my precious little kit, your kin locked me in your pitiful form long ago and made me suffer in the darkness, you tap my power and use it your own will without my permission. So now when all else fails you. When you want to die, when nothing in your life it worth saving I will throw you back into your life and make you suffer as you have made me suffer'

'No!' naruto screamed 'you can't do this to me!' but as Naruto began to protest he was thrown back into his own pain racked body.

He felt cold; he couldn't breathe so he coughed only a wet gaping met his ears. He felt strong arms under his neck and legs. He was lifted roughly up, water dipped down and off his body. Still he could not breath, his eyes were locked and bright white sparks flew across the blackness in front of his eyes every time he was jolted.

Naruto's felt his body being placed somewhere hardWarm fingers were placed on his neck, then even warmer lips were placed over his and air was forced into his mouth and down his wind pipe into the water filled lungs; a break and the movement was repeated. Naruto coughed again and a wave of water flowed from his lungs.

Naruto took a huge lungful of air, his eyes fluttered open and when they focused he looked up into the eye of his old sensei Kakashi. Kakashi had one hand resting on his mask which had been pulled up. Naruto's lungs burned and his body throbbed, black dots were beginning to fill his vision again.

'No, no, no, no, no' Naruto managed to croak before he slipped into unconsciousness

Ok it's a really short chapter and it's really slow but trust me I didn't rate this M for nothing REVIEW!!! FLAMES ACCEPTED!!! XP