A/N: All dialogue. Written this morning in an IM window with Reyclou in under ten minutes. She played Rodney, I played John. I'm surprised it worked out as well as it did, since the roles should have been reversed...

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"Ah, nothing like a nice morning rain."

"Drizzle, actually."

"Rain, Rodney."

"Rain falls as the result of large ice crystals which form in the upper troposphere. Drizzle is merely simple condensation and coalescence of cloud droplets, so the drops never get that large."

"Shut up and enjoy the wet, Rodney."

"You mean the ice."

"There's really no point in talking to you, is there?"

"All rain starts as ice. It's a simple fact of science."

"I bet you analyzed the stuffing of your favorite teddy bear as a child..."

"It was a penguin...named Eugene."

"Eugene?"

"Yes, Eugene."

"Oh, tell me you didn't name him after Gene Roddenberry."

"..."

"Oh my God, you did."

"I was FIVE, okay!? I was a very impressionable child."

"Impressionable. Uh huh."

"Pardon me for desiring something more mentally engaging than Barney and the Teletubbies."

"You're right, Rodney...I can't imagine you watching Barney...so Star Trek was clearly the more desirable option. Geek."

"Oh? and what did you watch when you were a kid, Colonel? Transformers?"

"Hey, Optimus Prime was cool."

"..."

"What?"

"Personally I preferred the Go-Bots."

"You would."

"I'm going to go find a raincoat."

"Don't you mean a 'drizzle' coat, Rodney?"

"WHATEVER."