The Magnificent Seven tag.
Please read multiple warnings below and remember this story is rated M for a reason. There will be talk of many nasty, disgusting, evil events. Many will ultimately be shown to be lies; some will unfortunately be based in truth. The story is dark and angsty before the light, but hopefully it will all be worth it when the brothers come to an understanding at the end.
In most of my stories I like to examine the psychological underpinnings of the Winchesters, trying to decipher their intricate personalities and figure out what makes them tick. I love all the Winchesters, but I believe we do them a disservice if we sugarcoat their lives and ignore all the tragedy they were forced to face and how strong they were to survive. I honestly hope none of this ever happened, but considering their lives and some of Dean's issues, it is entirely possible that something like this did happen during their childhood.
By examining these issues I truly hope for some resolution and insight into their troubled lives… at least that is my intent.
After the long, hot summer it was awesome to have Supernatural back, but I felt the first episode lacked the emotional reveal we are so used to getting from our Winchesters. I missed the angst and brotherly bonding. Yes, the last scene was great and so desperately needed, but when I saw Jensen's interview where he said Envy knew Dean my mind went into overdrive and I envisioned a scene similar to this.
The demon took the story places I never thought I would go, but it was necessary to tell this story. He gets extremely harsh, but he is an evil son-of-a-bitch. Remember, these are the demon's words, not mine, and definitely not always the truth. I've been told this demon is one of the nastiest, foul-mouthed, evil sonuvabitch villains ever seen in fanfics. This is without a doubt the most difficult and painful story I have ever attempted and I find it extremely unpleasant having this demon in my head.
Strong warnings for mentions of child abuse, sexual content including incest, rape, underage non-con, and coerced prostitution, explicit language, and so much evil filth coming out of the demon's mouth I can't believe I am even writing down what he has to say… but I promise, although the Winchesters' lives are difficult and painful, the brothers will come out intact at the end and hopefully closer and more in tune with each other. In my stories the boys always turn out all right.., well, as alright as Winchesters can be. I'll also go on record as a staunch supporter of John.
Although I am by no means an expert on this subject, I am trying to act responsibly here and only hope I can bring some enlightenment to some very difficult and sad issues. I have considerable empathy for the characters, I've done my research, and most importantly, all of my chapters are reviewed by a dear friend who is a professional counselor and has a Masters in Psychology. Please let me know if you see any troubling inconsistencies.
There is strength and hope in knowledge.
If you or someone you know has experienced any of these issues, please seek help and counseling. There is no shame in asking for help. We all need help when life becomes too harsh.
If all this seems too intense and painful to read then maybe you should skip it and catch my next story which I'm sure will be more within my norm and more cheery, although I do think this is some of my best writing… but then what do I know? It certainly hits on the emotional chords, but when you are dealing with the Winchesters and their fractured lives that isn't so very difficult. Unfortunately for Sammy, he is about to discover the fallacy in the old saying, "Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me." Oh, if only that were true.
And just for the record, any similarities to Sin City are simply great minds thinking alike. I never read the spoilers and much of this story was written before that episode aired. And yes, I did write the Pride chapter before DALDOM aired. I will admit I do get a thrill when my stories dovetail so nicely with the show's direction.
If you're still around and I haven't scared you off, thanks for reading, B.J.
What Evil Lurks in the Heart of Man
"Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust." John Webster
Chapter One – Lust
"Dean… Dean." The name dripped off the evil bastard's lips and sounded dirty, tainted, repulsive, so unlike the actual man, good and noble, a hero who would sacrifice his own soul for his kid brother without a thought toward his own impending side-trip to Hell. "So good to finally meet you." He licked his lips, his delight at this encounter making his eyes dance with malice. He snickered then, ever trying to twist whatever device he could to torment the humans. "You're shorter than I imagined.., but then, maybe it's just the company you keep. Sam… Sammy," the demon chuckled, low and sinister, black eyes smoldering with overbearing pleasure, embodying all of the seven deadly sins with total disregard for retribution as he turned his attention to the younger Winchester. Hell, that was one of the perks of the job.
His job kept him entertained in oh, so many ways. He delighted in watching all those messy insides spilling out to the outside, nasty and gross, and so very tasty. His greatest satisfaction came when he got to help them along with just a gentle nudge. That's all it took. Most people were so close, just waiting for an excuse, a justification; all they needed was a soft whisper of want to push them over the edge to darkness, into the shadows where he and his friends played. "Sammy… little Sammy… not so little now, is he, Dean?" He cast his eyes sideways to again look upon the older of the two, "But you still have to play the big brother, now don't you?"
"Shut the hell up," Dean yelled as he threw holy water across the chest of the demon causing it to writhe in agony as steam rose up with an awful hiss. "Sam, you want the honor of sending this evil sonofabitch back to Hell?"
"Dean, wait." Sam grimaced even as he said it, preferring to be rid of this evil as soon as possible, but knowing that in war sometimes you had to play all the angles.
Dean quickly looked up, his eyebrows arched, silent eyes searching. "Wait? Why? What for?"
Sam walked over to study the demon strapped to the chair beneath the devil's trap painted on the ceiling; the demon, Leviathan, intently returning his gaze. "We need to know what we're up against. We exorcise him back to Hell and we still have six more to deal with."
"Yeah, Sam, six instead of seven. I figure we'll just keep whittling them down."
"No, Dean. We need to know their plans… what they're going to do next."
"Do next? You're kidding, right? We know what they're going to do. They're gonna wreak havoc and kill people. That's what they're gonna do," Dean responded incredulously, his eyes begging to be rid of this garbage and his filthy lies just waiting to assault them.
"Yeah, but how?" Sam shook his head and locked eyes with his brother. "Dean, we need to find out everything we can before… "
"Yes, Sammy, you are so very wise… trust me… you want to hear what I have to say," the demon taunted, his voice drooling with the offer of salacious chit-chat, filled to capacity with the threat of impending mayhem. "Now, Dean there, he's a little shy. I don't think he wants you to hear what I know."
Dean snickered, "Yeah, right. Like you know crap?"
"Dean, I know everything about you. You're a walking encyclopedia of sin, aren't you?"
"Yeah? Yesterday's news. You got somethin' better 'cause otherwise you're toast." Dean was caressing the worn leather of the book holding the Latin words that would send this bastard back to Hell. He started flipping through the pages looking for just the right incantation.
"Oh, I have so much inside information, Sammy. I know things. Just how well do you think you know your brother?" The demon was smiling a twisted, smug grin, his eyes steady on Sam… waiting… waiting… almost there… one more moment… Sam shifted nervously, his face a testament to his anguish, an anguish born of the realization that Dean had traded his soul for his brother's life. Sam Winchester was the poster boy for the sensitive, scared, fractured embodiment of grief; while Dean held so many delicious fears battling for dominance, each one more bitter and broken than the last. It brought the demon so much unrestrained joy just to be in the same room with these Winchesters; Sammy's tortured emo guilt over living when he should be maggot feed and Dean… yes, Dean… no one came close to the quivering emotional devastation that was Dean Winchester. Ummm, so very tasty. He sucked in their pain, feeling it roll down his throat like the elixir of life.
"I said shut-up!" Dean threw more holy water across the demon and smirked as the thing screamed. "Sammy, he's not going to tell us anything. It's a lost cause." He cast a pleading gaze toward his brother, his eyes silently willing him to just let this one go. The safest bet here was to exorcise the demon before he latched on to your mind, before he got to play his twisted game with your very soul. "Sam… he just wants to toy with us. Don't let him."
Sam heard his brother's words and it made perfect sense. The hunter in him was in total agreement, this demon would never tell them the other demons' plans, would never betray his comrades, but then Sam looked up and saw fear in Dean's eyes. Not from the danger of facing the seven deadly sins personified. No.., Dean feared something else, something more. Sam shook at the realization. Dean feared the truth. And that thought scared Sam more than the impending battle. Just what was this demon waiting to say? What hidden truths could he reveal? He could see it in Dean's eyes, the terror of being stripped naked and exposed by this demon, all his hidden secrets laid bare as his protective walls crumbled under the harsh glare of the truth.
All reason left Sam and he found himself reacting to pure emotion; his heart desperate and reeling from the events of the last week and stretching for answers. Answers to questions he hadn't yet formulated in his own mind, but he knew he needed to know. He needed to know the truth. He needed to understand his brother before it was too late. His heart seized in a violent spasm as his mind took him down that long road of no return, where right and justice refused to tread, where his brother would perish in one year's time.
Sam turned toward the demon, his gut clenched tight as he stepped on the landmine. Demons lie. He knew that. They tormented you with misperceptions and total fabrications… but they also sometimes told the truth, but only if the truth could bring about pain. Sam was already in pain, a little more couldn't possibly hurt all that much, and if it brought enlightenment then it would be pain well spent.
"So.., tell me," Sam whispered.
"Sam…" Dean's voice was distant; a sharp edge to it, but it was lost somewhere in the vast space between them. Sam's focus now fixed on the demon and the tales he could tell.
The demon rolled his lips over shiny white teeth, his tongue darting out to moisten them, waiting… waiting… until he heard those three little words… gotcha! He offered a broad welcoming smile, drawing Sam into his web. "Sammy, what would you like to hear? Which vice tops the list?"
Dean's voice was cold and insistent. "Sam, no. Don't you listen to this crap." He turned to the demon, the threat evident, "You shut the fuck up."
For the demon it was perfectly timed when Bobby came running into the room at that precise moment, his face flushed, an urgent tone to his voice. "Dean, c'mon."
Dean reacted quickly to the panic in Bobby's voice, shifting to follow him before grinding to a halt as he passed Sam, bringing that urgency to second place behind his need to protect his kid brother. He stood there staring at Sam as Bobby yelled at him to move his ass. Distracted, Dean snapped, "Bobby, what?"
"Dean, I need you now!" Bobby growled, the impending danger from the remaining demons his only focus. Time was short and they needed to prepare.
Sam recognized the need in Dean's eyes, the harrowed look at leaving this demon alone with his brother diverting his attention from the job. Sam's welfare and protection again more important than any job. "Dean, go. Bobby needs you."
Dean glared at the demon's smug, victorious grin and hauled off slamming his fist hard into the tormenting face. The force almost knocked the demon to the floor, the chair he was strapped to teetering precariously before settling again on all four legs. The powerful blow succeeding in knocking the demon unconscious, his head lulling to the side and hanging there like a puppet whose strings had been cut. Dean glanced at his brother and concern spread across his face before quickly receding into a gentle plea, unspoken but needy, desperate even, before his voice found him, "Sam, don't you listen to a word he says. You hear me?"
"He doesn't look to be doing much talking now, does he?" Sam wearily replied.
Dean slammed the leather book with the exorcism in his brother's hands and offered one final order, "He wakes up.., you exorcise him. You hear me?"
"Yeah, Dean. You better go."
Dean straightened out his tense shoulders and gave his brother one last soulful look before hurriedly following Bobby out the back door. Sam heard Bobby's car start up and only momentarily wondered where they were off to. It didn't matter. The only thing that mattered now was the evil that sat across from him and the secrets he might reveal.
Sam watched as the demon raised his head and smiled. "Your brother never was that smart."
"So." Sam stood behind a barstool barely three feet before the demon, his fingers wrapped tight around the wooden seat, like he needed the meager support it offered as he faced off against the demon. "You were saying?"
"Where shall we start? The list is so long… but then you knew that. You aren't entirely ignorant of your brother's failings, are you, Sammy boy?"
Sam shuddered, but his eyes fixed in determination. He felt like he was betraying Dean by allowing this monster to defile his good name and all the great accomplishments of his life, and a part of him wanted to bust the demon's jaw himself for daring to speak Dean's name. But a part of him needed to know and Dean wasn't talking. It was sordid and unsavory and so very wrong on so many levels… but God help him, he needed to know.
"Well, you're Envy. Sounds like as good a place to start as any. So is Dean envious of something?"
"Something?" Leviathan chuckled, low and throaty, and his smirk was so maddening, so sinister. "Not something, Sammy… someone."
Sam looked up and blinked back tears that were starting to form, the fear building as if he already knew the answer. The words of the shapeshifter in St. Louis fresh in his mind, always there… buried deep so he didn't have to face that bitter truth every time his brother sacrificed another piece of himself for the good of the family, but always there.
He sure got issues with you. You got to go to college. I had to stay home… with Dad. You don't think I had dreams of my own? But Dad needed me. Where the hell were you?
Sam focused his mind on the task at hand and steadied his features; he wasn't going to let this evil bastard win at this game they were playing. "Well, don't keep me hanging here. You got something to say… say it."
That wicked tongue rolled out again, slowly wetting his lips, tantalizing with hesitation before gently whispering, "No.., don't think so. I think we'll keep that tidbit for the finale." He grinned, enjoying the torment already present on Sam's face and anticipating the escalation. "Let's start with the obvious, shall we?"
Sam nodded his head in frustration, mad at himself for allowing this travesty, furious he couldn't stop the assault, but desperate to know for sure. "By all means," he calmly replied as he sat down on the stool in front of the demon.
"Let's see, what's first on the Dean Winchester send-me-straight-to-Hell list of sins? There is so much competition, but I think you'll agree Lust would have to top the list. So clear-cut, but then it has provided what little relief your poor, unfortunate brother has so desperately sought out. It wasn't his first sin by far, but it has been the most consistent. He not only sealed his own fate, but he's taken a considerable number of tainted women along for the ride… " the demon laughed at his own joke, "so to speak."
"I thought you were going to tell me something I didn't know," Sam sighed as if bored. "I mean, Dean and the ladies… not exactly breaking news."
"You got me there." The demon hunched his shoulders down and looked back to see if they were still alone. The other hunter, Tamara, was stationed at the front of the house far from the fun they were engaged in, leaving Sam to face the demon and his lurid tales all alone. With the coast clear, he smiled. "The women, yes… but how about the men? Huh? Huh, Sammy… you ever considered that? I mean, your brother is a fine piece of ass and even you have to know how sensual he is… how desirable… the carnal cravings that consume him. You've seen how women react to him. He exudes sex… why would it be any different with men? He does always seem to need the attention… the validation. I mean really, what else does he have?"
"You think so?"
"Yeah, I think so." Sam's head threw back as he forced out a laugh, deep from his chest. "C'mon.., Dean? That is so not true." After a few moments of silence to prove his point, Sam got a serious cast to his eyes as he stared down the demon, "Hey, newsflash, buster, this isn't the dark ages; it wouldn't matter even if it was true.., but it's not. I know my brother. He doesn't swing that way." Sam confidently grinned as he leaned in toward the demon, "You're lying… first strike."
"You do know your brother, Sammy, but you don't know everything… otherwise, why would we be having this conversation?" Sam shifted slightly, still confident in what he knew, but a slight worry invaded his thoughts. The demon smiled as he continued, "You only know what he wants you to see, but deep down… you have to know he's twisted… bent… Hell, let's face it, Sammy… the boy is broken… " The demon smiled, drawing out the suspense, waiting until he could feel Sam ready to snap from the dreaded anticipation. "You remember, don't you, Sammy? How he was always seeking out Daddy's approval? Didn't you ever wonder about that? How far he would go to please Daddy? You first noticed it back when you were a teen, didn't you? How poor, little Sammy felt left out, 'cause Dad and Dean shared a special bond that you just couldn't compete with."
Sam trembled, his gut clenched tight and his eyes watered, but his mind couldn't grasp the concept, it was wrong, surreal, and it couldn't possibly be what the fear screamed out in his head. "What are you saying?" his voice barely audible as his fears tumbled out into the open.
The demon slowly reeled him in, the scared little boy thrashing on the line, refusing to acknowledge the sordid, dark images, but his ears couldn't deny the truth as the demon laid it all out. "It's only human to need love, Sam. Daddies get lonely too. After all, Mommy died such a long time ago and Dean looks so much like her. Can't you see why Daddy would want to reach out to that for comfort?"
Sam's eyebrows arched and his jaw dropped, his faced tensed from the implication. "You're a filthy liar. It was never like that. That's sick." The shock seemed to overwhelm Sam, and he couldn't even react. He sat there unable to fight back, numb from the terror that maybe there were secrets too horrific even for Dean to bear. But this? This never happened; that much he knew with certainty. Yeah, their lives were twisted; so far beyond normal they'd need fucking binoculars to even see normal off in the distance, but this? No, it never happened… neither Dad or Dean would ever be that twisted. It was perverted and it was a lie.
"I know this is difficult, but then the truth can be painful… and so very cruel. No one wants to believe something like that about someone they love. Did ya ever think, Sammy, that maybe when you're all snuggled in tight in some motel room reading a book or something, that Dean's out there looking for some random guy to play Daddy with him? Some tall, dark-haired stranger with a deep voice just raring to make him into the good little soldier again? Whip him into shape?" The demon was enjoying his little show and the effects from it. He could taste the anguish that was swallowing Sam. The pain had latched on to the young man and was simmering just beneath the surface where he was trying so desperately to contain it. The pain and anguish burning like molten lava in his gut, quietly waiting to spill out into the night.
The demon sucked in the scent of pain and pushed onward. "On some nights when Dean gets that itch… women are the last thing on his mind. That's when he needs a little Daddy lovin'… " The demon watched and waited, drawing out his tale while the younger Winchester stewed in his terror. "Poor, poor, pathetic Dean…, on really bad nights he goes looking for some of Daddy's hurtin'. You can't blame him really; after all, you'd be twisted too… if Daddy did those things to you."
The words burst out of Sam, violent and terror-filled, "You shut the hell up, you lying bastard." Sam gave in to the bitter rage, and took three steps toward the demon and clocked him one right on the jaw. The demon's head whipped to the side but slowly turned back to face him, smiling as a single line of blood dripped down his chin, his tongue swirling out to lap it up. "Ummm, yummy."
"Just shut up, you perverted liar." Sam shook from the rage, disgust and contempt.
"Wrath… " The demon made Hannibal Lecter's little lapping sound as he delighted in the pain filling the room. "Would you like some fava beans with that rage, Sammy? I swear my diet is going to hell in a handbasket… talk about gluttony. You Winchesters are just too damn good to me." The demon smirked, his eyes shining. "This is all so very tasty, Sammy. We'll get to Wrath in a bit, patience, my boy… one sin at a time now."
"I should exorcise your worthless ass back to Hell."
"Fine… do it," the demon taunted. He sat silently watching Sam… watching and waiting.
Sam paced back and forth in front of the demon. His skin was crawling with the sick thoughts that bastard tried to place in his mind. He knew it was all lies… he knew it. Of all the lies this evil could tell, nothing could be worse than this. He knew his family was fucked up, but this… never. He had never been more sure of anything in his life. Dad loved them as sons, nothing more and nothing less. Dad himself would have killed any man that laid a hand on either of his sons in that way. He might have had his faults, but protecting his sons had always been the driving force in his life. The man died to protect his sons… it was a mockery to hear him cast in this light. It was wrong… so fucking wrong, and the only way to right it was to send this bastard back to Hell.
Sam palmed the Latin book, flipping it open to the page Dean had earmarked, but he couldn't bring himself to mouth the words. He'd started this sick encounter and he hadn't yet learned anything insightful and he knew this demon knew something of value… he could sense it. As difficult as it was to hear the lies, and man, he wanted to see this evil burn in Hell for telling that lie, he knew he needed to wade through the lies to reach the truth. He locked eyes with Leviathan and took a deep breath.
"I don't believe a word of it."
"That's your choice."
Sam took another breath, his insides trembling with unexpected stirrings. The doubt and hate and uncertainty trying to break his resolve, making him question everything he knew about his family. This was a lie… that was a given, but what truth did the demon know? Sam still knew there was insight to be gained if he could just bear the pain of these lies. He had to stand firm. "You have anything that's not lies?"
"Sammy, I have just what you're looking for. I am proud of you though, son. It takes great courage to face that which we most don't want to believe."
"Don't you dare call me son. Just get on with it." Sam again sat down on the stool across from the demon. His hands clenched into fists and resting nervously on his knees as he waited for the onslaught of more pain.
The demon thoughtfully examined the young man before him, smiling silently to himself before continuing on, delighting in the hurt filling the room. "You said it yourself, remember? …that Dean was too macho, overcompensating… but then you're just too close to see the truth, aren't you, Sammy? The tells are there. Why do you think they always assume you're a couple? Dean oozes sex and like a dog, he doesn't care who he's humping. He's a stud, out to hire.., only he doesn't even collect, now does he? Just gives it away… " the demon snickered, low and sinister, "more like a mutt actually, sniffing out anything with a pulse. Your brother… he really is a nasty boy, always has been."
Sam could no longer contain his disgust for all the lies. This demon was wallowing in the same, old tired lies and was trying to pull Sam into the garbage heap with him. He was sick of it all. He rose up and splashed holy water across the demon's face which contorted and screamed in agony. "You lying bastard. You're twisting everything. It's not true.., it's not Dean."
"You keep believing that, Sammy."
"Liar." Sam was matter-of-fact, sure beyond any doubt, but that didn't make it hurt any less. The lies only make him feel like he was betraying Dean even more by listening to this demon instead of exorcising him back to Hell. Sam grimaced, confident in the lies and deceit even as tears welled in his eyes. He repeated the only truth he knew, "Liar."
The demon smirked, and then he laughed, long and hard, delighting in the pained expression on Sam's face. "Oh, I almost had you there… almost." He tossed back his head. "Now that would be a sight to gouge your eyes out over, huh, Sammy boy? Can you imagine spotting your brother in some dirty alley doing some cowboy? Brokeback Hunter. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?" The demon closed his eyes in a mock display of ecstasy, licking his lips and arching his eyebrows as his black eyes slowly opened and his smirk deepened. "Lust, it's a powerful emotion and the only one your brother regularly calls friend. And you thought your brother didn't have any friends. On second thought, maybe it's more like a lover… It's been seducing him since he was a teen, desperate for love… for a tender touch." He smiled at the glimmer of recognition that formed on Sam's face. "It's pathetic, really… but oh, so very delicious."
"It's not like that. He's not hurting anyone. It's consensual. It's a natural act."
"You got it down pat, don'tcha, Sammy? Dean's words, a little justification… he needs this… doesn't he deserve some happiness?… it's just a release… what's the use of saving the world if you can't get a little nookie? It's a slippery slope, Sammy… and Dean.., Dean's on a toboggan heading for the finish line. Oh, and did I forget to mention… that's at the Gates of Hell?" The demon sat there lapping up the grief, swirling it around in his mouth before swallowing and gaining sustenance. He gazed into the anguished eyes of the younger Winchester and offered more salt for his wounds, "Sorry, I know you need your little fantasy… big brother as some kind of fucking hero, but I don't think God sees it your way, but then again… all the better for me. The truth is your brother has a one-way ticket to Hell, deal or no deal."
"Lies," Sam spat out, all his fury erupting. "So is that all you've got?"
"Nope.., just testing you. You're right. I was lying about the men and Daddy, but damn, that would be hot. Wouldn't it? Oh, that was one of my better tales... so vivid…" he chuckled, "Technicolor and surround sound… just the pictures in my mind had me ready to jerk off. But then I always did get off on the human condition… the sickness that consumes so many families. Guess your family had enough other ills, huh, Sammy? Too bad, really… I could have really savored a little interaction there… can't fault a guy for dreaming." The demon smiled at the tense posture of the young man, delighting in the wedge he was using to pry him open, stirring up the turmoil in his gut, anticipating the coming explosion when those tasty insides first saw the light of day. "See… you have nothing to fear here. You've got that demon second-sight… can't fool you… you're still one of the special children, aren't ya, Sammy? Nope, you know your brother, so you have absolutely nothing to worry about. You know the truth… you just need me to say it, don't you?"
"You got something to say, just get to it. We don't have all night. Dean gets back and he's gonna waste you and I might even help."
"Promises, promises… but then that's what you Winchesters are good at. Right, Sammy boy?"
Next chapter – Gluttony
This is a work-in-progress which I swore I would never again do. I much prefer working a story to death and making sure all the pieces fit before I post. It's nerve-wracking to post without the story completely worked out. This seems like a timely story that is demanding to be told so I'm gonna give it a go, but bear with me. I have found that sometimes the pressure yields unexpected good things. Let's see what happens. Again, any comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks, B.J.