Costume Shopping At Lingerie Stores

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Disclaimer: I don't own DOTM—this story is for the sake of Halloween and the humor of whorish costumes.

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"Oh, come on!"

"No."

"But… all the other girls have done it, so why can't I do it at least once?"

"No—"

"I wouldn't mind her wearing it."

"Stay out of this, Stanton!"

"But see! He agrees with me!"

"That's because… he's your boyfriend! He'd just love to see you wearing something from that place!"

"I would." Chuckle

"Shut up!"

"Collin, it's just as a joke—"

"But it's inappropriate, sluttish, and… I don't want to see you in it because that'd be just gross!"

"Then don't look at me."

"…No."

"How come Jimena gets to wear one then?"

"Because she's not my little sister—"

"And you'd just love to see her wearing one of those." Smirk

Eye twitch. "Stanton, I'm warning you."

"Oh! I like that one! Ringmaster… Hmm…"

"No."

"Don't you think you should be the kitten?"

"Stanton—"

"But there's barely any clothing—!"

"Precisely."

"God damn it, Stanton!"

-:-

Meanwhile, from across the room…

Catty: He's pretty horny.

Vanessa: -shrug- He is a guy.

Catty: Are we going to shop there, too? For our costumes, I mean.

Vanessa: Where? You mean Frederick's (Of Hollywood)?

Catty: Yep, yep!

Vanessa: Duh. I've already picked out my costume.

Michael: -pale- And what would that be?

Vanessa: French Maid.

-Michael: nose bleed-

Catty: I wonder what I'll be…

Chris: -pale-

Vanessa: I saw a Shanghai Girl—

Chris: What's that?!

Vanessa: -smirk- Imagine a kimono or Geisha-thingy… with most of the skirt gone.

Catty: -O.o-

Vanessa: So I'm a French Maid, Serena's a ringmaster—

Catty: with a whip!

Vanessa: And Catty's a Shanghai girl… What's Jimena again?

Catty: A 'Sexy Police Officer'.

Vanessa: … Does that come with a whip?

-Michael and Chris: fall over-