Danny should have known better than to think he could stay angry at Lindsay. That their first fight would end in any other way. This thought crosses his mind as he pushes her against his apartment door, pressing his body against hers. His hands try to be everywhere on her at once, making up for lost time – one week that Danny wishes he could take back.
One week ago his life overwhelmed him. There was no major crisis or catastrophe. Just the right – or wrong – combination of little things that added up to push him over the edge. He'd come to terms with his comatose brother, still lifeless in the hospital bed. But there were days when seeing his not-quite-dead brother made him get angry at how unfair life could be. Last Thursday had been one of those days. Then, the next day he'd had a heated exchange with Mac about not letting his emotions get the best of him during cases. He'd walked out of Mac's office so pissed that it took all of his self-control to not punch a hole in the wall. Then, on top of that his case was going nowhere and all their suspects seemed to be assholes.
Danny felt like nothing was going his way, like he was failing at life. So, he got angry. And he took it out on Lindsay. He knew it wasn't fair but did it anyway. She was the closest person to him both in actual proximity and emotionally and it made him feel better to funnel his anger at someone, to direct his attention on something else. He was distant, avoided her when he felt like it but sought her out to intentionally get under her skin when it made him feel better to do so. When they did have an actual conversation he knew he acted like a jerk – curt answers, no smile.
Danny slides his hands along her sides and buries his face in her throat as if trying to force out those memories. He bites her lightly at the base of her neck but immediately licks the same spot, making it a loving gesture instead of an angry one.
Maybe he could plead temporary insanity for the way he'd been acting for the past week because as Lindsay let her head fall back to allow him better access he realizes pushing her away made him ache worse than anything else weighing on his mind. That's why when he saw her standing at his door he said nothing. Instead he pulled her close and slammed the door shut before she changed her mind. And then began their frenzied kisses and touches – their way of reaffirming that they were alright, that everything was okay.
His kisses are possessive, traced with the despair of a man who almost lost the most important thing to him, their tongues dueling for control. He feels like himself again pressed hard against her, feeling every inch of her, kissing her where he knows will make her gasp. Her hands tangle themselves in his hair and clothes while her legs wrap around his hips, desperately trying to draw them closer together even though it is physically impossible.
Lindsay wasn't sure what to expect when she came to Danny's apartment at close to midnight. They had barely spoken the past two days, the repercussions of their first fight still strongly reverberating between them. She didn't know what to make of Danny's behavior the past week. He had turned into a person she didn't know. Didn't want to know. She tried understanding, tried to help him get through whatever was bothering him. But she felt the more she tried the meaner he got. On day five of his bad mood she started to get angry and pushed back at him. She demanded to know what was wrong and when he still wouldn't open up she finally reached her boiling point. She supposed it was inevitable - their first full-blown, all-out yelling match. Lindsay said she couldn't be in a relationship like this; that he had to talk to her. Or else what, he had demanded to know. They both refused to back down – Lindsay refusing to accept Danny's behavior, Danny refusing to acknowledge his bad mood or its cause. They screamed at each other, pointing out each other's faults in the highest volume possible. They each had taken their fair share of low blows, said things they regretted later.
It ended with Lindsay in tears, and Danny exhausted. They spent the next two days engulfed in silent treatment, cold looks and uneasiness. Not wanting to spend another minute in that hell Lindsay came to his apartment to make amends. When he opened the door she saw her own despair and sadness mirrored in Danny's face and knew they were both sorry. So she jumped into his arms, accepting his kisses, giving him plenty of her own.
Danny lifts off her shirt and his fingers tantalizingly graze against her skin, sending shivers through her body. Lindsay runs her hands across Danny's chest and lifts his shirt off so they're both skin to skin. She loves the feeling of his bare chest against hers – his roughness contrasting her softness. Danny groans when her hand slides between their bodies and strokes him through his jeans. She quickly undoes his fly and slips her hand inside, stroking him lightly, causing him to jerk against her touch. Danny wants to throw them onto the floor and take Lindsay right then and there. But he knows he needs to be slow and gentle. The past week had been filled with enough roughness and force.
So he cradles her into his arms to carry her to his bedroom. As soon as he lays her on the bed her hands are back in his hair, pulling his mouth to hers for another kiss. His hands slide down her shoulders, over her chest, fingers flicking against the sensitive skin covered by her bra before he continues down to the waist of her pants. As he slides them down her legs his mouth follows their progress, his lips skimming along the bare flesh that is revealed to him. His fingertips trace lazy patterns along her sides, over her legs, inside her thighs. He grins up at her when she lightly pulls his hair, attempting to direct him where to touch her. There is something in the way she looks in this moment – the way he can see her completely losing herself to him – that sends shivers down his spine.
He wonders if that's the reason he made her his emotional punching bag. He felt everything else in his life that he cared about was slowly falling out of his control – like sand through his fingers. Deep down he feared Lindsay would join that spill. That he would somehow mess up and lose her too. Maybe he was taking a preemptive strike - he would push her away before she did it to him. And he'd pushed her hard and far the past week. Almost too far, he realizes.
Danny unclasps her bra, throwing it aside. His hands slide down her stomach, his eyes holding hers the entire way as he hooks his fingers in her underwear and slips them down her thighs before kissing a path along the smooth skin of her hips and dipping between her legs. Her body bends toward his lips, gasping his name. He smiles at her reaction, grinning up at her before kissing a trail back up her body. His fingers run lazily along her inner thighs, a gentle torture, as he kisses her lips, chest, stomach.
Danny looks at Lindsay, satisfied by the glazed look in her eyes. He's filled with the need to apologize, grateful that she's forgiven him without one up to this point. As if sensing his thoughts and not wanting him to say anything, Lindsay pulls him to her to catch his mouth in a searing kiss, her teeth nipping at his lower lip. He pulls back slightly, teasingly placing light pecks on her lips and along her jaw, hoping she senses the apology in each kiss. His fingers resume their excruciatingly sweet torture between her thighs, each stroke sending a jolt of pleasure through her body.
Lindsay's hands alternate between his shoulders, back and hair, unsure where to stay as sensations muddle her mind. Her moans of frustrated pleasure only serve to motivate Danny to continue his ministrations instead of making him touch her where, and as hard as, she desperately wants him to. She greedily reaches for his lips but he won't be deterred, instead staring at her with a clenched jaw, fighting the urges of his own pleasure. She feels her skin tingle beneath his gaze and everything disappears around her except for him and the sensations his touches create within her.
He suddenly leans in and kisses her hard, while he dips a finger inside her. Her body arches into his touch, all traces of teasing now gone as she gasps into his mouth. His tongue is possessive as he takes in the desperate moans he draws out of her that seem to hold all the anguish she'd buried inside the past week. It's not long before she muffles a cry against his shoulder, her fingers caught in his hair as she shudders against him.
She lays in his arms, watching him while he watches her, tracing the angles of his face with her fingers before pulling him into another kiss. Her hands move down his back and hook on his jeans, their tongues battle playfully. How could he have lived without this, Danny wonders. Because that's what he was asking for the way he acted the past week. He shivers at that cold reality.
Danny moves on top of her, supporting his weight on his forearms. He leans down to kiss her deeply. Lindsay moans into his mouth as he enters her. Filling her again finally makes Danny feel sane. Their pace starts off slow but quickly builds. Skin slides against skin, and they are so lost in each other physically and emotionally that neither is sure of where one begins and the other ends.
There are feverish kisses and hands everywhere. Hard, quick movements replace the gentleness and teasing from minutes earlier. Lindsay's nails leave red trails across his back and his teeth do the same on her shoulder. There is a hunger between them, a desperate need to be as close together as possible. Danny thinks he can hear Lindsay's heartbeat, and is pretty sure his own changes to match hers. He has never felt more connected to anyone.
Gasping her name, his body arches into hers and she mirrors his movement. Her hands run down his back, everything else fading away. They come simultaneously, an incoherent mixture of moans and gasped names. They lay breathless on the bed, still tangled together as he lazily strokes her hair. He's not sure how much time passes before he finally breaks the silence.
"I'm sorry," he says softly, but Lindsay still hears the bit of uncertainty in his voice as if he's not sure she will accept it. He knows that he's drawn to her like a moth to a flame. But he also knows that she would never burn him. She was here, in his bed, in his life and she wanted to be with him. Lindsay saw in him an imperfect man but still a man she could be proud of. A man she could love. That's why she came to his door tonight.
Lindsay wraps her arms tightly around him, her way of reassuring him that they are alright. She knows that they will fight again. She knows that maybe each of them is too stubborn for their own good. Maybe they'll end up screaming at each other and slamming doors again. Maybe it will be over something big or probably over something silly. But she doesn't care because she also knows they'll come back to each other. They're both too strong and too resilient for that to happen. So she buries her head further into his shoulder and smiles into his chest as his arms tighten around her.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Thanks for reviewing! Thanks to mel60 for beta-ing!