Author's Notes: Hi all from Deadlypole, I have rewritten this story entirely (as in each chapter has been 'refurbished').

Original Notes:

I wrote a Shaman King lemon oneshot and told myself I would not write another story till it received at least one review. So here I am now writing my first chapter of "Shinji and Asuka", this is probably going to be long story, and I'll try to update when I can.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gainax, Evangelion or any of its characters. This story is a non-profit creative writing based on the series 'Neon Genesis Evangelion' which does not belong to me in any way.

Some notes:

Baka - idiot

Mein Gott - My God

"speech" quotations

'thought' quotations

An important note, this story has one change in the storyline and that is the fact that Touji did not lose any limbs when his infected evangelion was defeated by Shinji.

A note to say this is the second rewrite of chapter 1.

Important Note: If you're reading this, you're reading the up to date version of the story.


*TRIGGER WARNING!* This chapter contains sexual violence and may be offensive to many readers. If you do not wish to read this entire chapter, go to the 'skip end' when you see the 'skip'. I will provide a chapter summary of this chapter at the bottom for those who do not want to read this chapter at all. This will be the only time I do this, as this is the only chapter some people might not be able to read.


Chapter 1: Consequences (Shinji's Decision)

It was a quiet afternoon at the Katsuragi residence. Currently there were only two occupants inside the dwelling. They both had no idea about the event that was about to transpire, something that would change their lives forever. The two teenagers, a young boy and girl, had been living in the same household for a while now. The girl in question was in an unpleasant mood, practically anything the male did was irritating her.

Asuka moved up to the boy and knocked him over the head with her fist, annoyed with his incompetence.

"Shinji you baka, you haven't made dinner yet!" she shouted, causing said boy to jump. "Have you seen the time?! Are you that stupid that I have to tell you? How long were you planning to have me starve?" she asked him.

The brown-haired boy just looked at her with fear, unable to reply.

"My patience is wearing thin" she said, narrowing her eyes. "I highly advise you not to keep me waiting any longer" the clearly aggravated redhead ordered.

"Y-yes yes, right away Asuka, I'm sorry!" Shinji squeaked in reply.

Her eyebrow twitched with his predictable apology; she was just barely holding back her anger at his pitiful behaviour. She forced herself to look away and started off, sick of seeing his wimpy face.

"What in the world is her problem?" he muttered quietly as she turned away. "Can't she leave me be for one day?" he asked himself.

Hearing him mutter something, her anger flared again. "What did you say?!" she demanded, moving back and refocusing her attention on him.

"N-Nothing!" he replied instantly, surprised she had heard anything.

"Don't play dumb! I heard you say something, you spineless wimp!" she said snarling at him.

"N-No I-" he started.

"You better not be calling me a liar" she hissed.

"No! Sorry!" he replied on impulse.

The redhead's anger just resurfaced with his repeat apology, her eyes darkening. "BAKA! Seriously just SHUT UP!" she yelled, smacking him on the forehead. Seeing his hurt face and the satisfaction it gave her, she decided she had made her point. Not wanting to prolong her dinner any longer, she turned quickly with a grunt and stormed off before she lost all her self-control.

Looking after her stunned, Shinji waited till she was no longer in sight before sighing, afraid to move or do anything at all with her around. Remembering the cause of her anger, he swiftly went into the kitchen to start making dinner.

The boy was finding it increasingly difficult to deal with his roommate. It had all started after he had defeated the 14th angel Zeruel and returned from being absorbed by Unit 01. Without any reason he could know about, Asuka had treated him coldly the moment he returned and had since made sure to put him down and make him suffer at every given moment. The whole ordeal with the angel had been horrifying for him, but that seemed not to deter the unsympathetic girl. Having been out of touch with reality during that time, he just couldn't understand what he had done to make her behave this way towards him. Wanting to avoid upsetting the girl he had asked Misato, however, Misato simply told him to wait till Asuka settled down; Asuka was only angry because she had humiliatingly lost to the angel, while Shinji was able to prevail. On top of all that, her sync ratio was low and the young girl probably felt like she was becoming useless as a pilot.

While Shinji could somewhat understand Asuka's frustration, he struggled to be sympathetic with her situation. He certainly did not feel her desire to be the best pilot, in fact quite the opposite, he would rather have nothing to do the evas. He probably didn't realise that his attitude towards evas only served to compound the issue; that she was losing to someone who wasn't even trying seriously.

And so, the teenage boy found it extremely unfair that he should have to deal with her abusive behaviour just because she was unhappy about the angel fight. Did anyone consider his feelings in the matter? Unfortunately, with everything that was happening, Misato was too busy to do anything about it. Additionally, their guardian didn't realise how bad it actually was as she was away from the house for long periods of time. In her mind Asuka was behaving similar to her usual self, failing to realise that the redhead's anger was almost exclusively targeted at the male eva pilot. Shinji was used to Asuka's usual behaviour, in fact in some ways he looked forward to interacting with her; it brought some stimulation into his otherwise dull everyday life. Contrasted with the current endless smacking, yelling and harsh insults, he was really losing his mind and being worn down.

The girl had on various occasions flat out refused to eat his cooking, even going so far as to throw it in his face. The redhead would "accidentally" step on his toes whenever she walked by him. He had lost count of the times he had been called wimp, stupid or baka daily; she would even use it to address him when she wanted his attention. With the sheer amount of physical abuse he received from her, be it a smack or a slap, it was a wonder he still had any brain cells left. However, Shinji never fought back, half out of fear, half out of habit and apologised every time, always placing the blame on himself.

Recalling the impatient girl that was waiting for him, he shook his thoughts away and returned to making dinner. The boy desperately scrounged through the fridge for ingredients with very little success, frowning at the lack of food. 'What am I going to do?... No matter how I look at it, anything I make with this is going to piss Asuka off' he thought with dismay. He quickly dismissed the idea of running away as he knew that would be far worse. Time was ticking and Shinji could not afford to deliberate. Without further ado, he opted on making some ramen; it was the safest choice that came to mind. With that decided, he immediately began preparing the meal, temporarily taking his mind off the girl.

After a while, the smell of food had brought Asuka rushing in and she decided to sit down at the table as she waited for Shinji to finish. He brought the finished meal to the table and set it down in front of Asuka. She just looked at her meal distastefully.

"Why did you make the same stinking Japanese food again? Don't you have any taste at all?" she asked annoyed.

"I'm sorry Asuka, there was very little in the fridge, it was all I could make" he replied timidly.

"Stop saying sorry you baka" she snapped.

"S-Sor-" he started.

"I will seriously rip your tongue out if you finish that word!" she roared.

"Ummm, enjoy your meal Asuka" he said lamely.

She snorted at this but said nothing further. Nevertheless, she dug into her meal quickly. Shinji looked up at her, momentarily taking a glance at her as she ate; Asuka was wearing a loose top and her hair was a little untidy. The young girl was certainly quite attractive but he found her current behaviour greatly offset that. Fearing that he would get caught looking at her, he returned his gaze back down to his food. Luckily, she hadn't noticed as she finished off her meal swiftly. Getting up without a word, she deposited her empty dish into the sink. On her way back to her room, she made sure to bump into Shinji's chair causing him to spill his food all over himself. Asuka continued on to her room as if nothing had happened, leaving Shinji utterly confused.

The boy continued eating his meal slowly in silence. Finally free of her presence, he sighed; his face showing a little frustration. This day was turning out to be particularly bad; he received low grades at school, the teacher singled him out for messaging Touji in class and he had forgotten to bring his lunch to school. Asuka's behaviour on top of all this was just the icing on the cake. Shinji knew Asuka was selfish and didn't really care much for him, but it seemed like she was going out of her way to make sure he suffered.

'I wish she would actually listen to me or try to get along' he thought 'Why doesn't Misato tell her off?' he thought. Though Shinji didn't realise that Misato almost always took his side already; anymore and Asuka would likely stop listening to her entirely.

Finishing his meal, the boy put his plate in the sink and proceeded to wash the dishes. He paused to eye the knife in the sink, honestly contemplating how easy it would be to bring an end to his miserable life. Coming out of the traumatic experience with Unit-01 and only barely regaining the desire to live, he sometimes wondered why he had bothered to come back. After living in reality again for several weeks, it was all just so painful; the hurt others inflicted on him, the loneliness he felt and the always present threat of an angel attack.

Not wanting to go into a panic attack, he emptied his mind, inhaling deeply and focused on washing the dishes; the warm water somewhat helping him relax. His reprieve was short-lived; just as he finished cleaning the dishes, Asuka came into the kitchen and gave Shinji a painful tap on the head. The boy flinched a little before turning around to face her wondering what she wanted.

"I'm bored" she declared.

'Uh-oh not that word' Shinji thought, remembering the last time she had said it.

"Umm… I-err… uh?" he fumbled, unable to stop himself blushing.

"Stop your perverted thoughts right now!" she interrupted. "Are you honestly thinking I would EVER do anything like that with you?"

"No A-Asuka! I just umm-" he stuttered.

"Stop, just stop" she said, not wanting to hear his excuses. "I'm already regretting starting this conversation" she remarked, sighing.

Shinji just stayed silent, wondering if she was just tormenting him to pass the time.

"I was simply wondering if you were going to do anything or had any ideas" she prompted.

He paused to think and started talking to himself out loud "Hmm… the house is cleaned, the dishes are washed, the laundry done… Is that everything…? I don't think I have anything to do at the moment…umm-"

"What a boring little boy…" she interrupted, growing tired of his monologue.

Shinji felt his hand clench. She had asked him if he was free, what was the point if she didn't even want to listen.

"I don't understand what you want from me Asuka" he responded.

"Some semblance of fun or intelligence you dull boy. Though I can see that's bordering on near impossible for you" she retorted.

He sighed, unable to hide his irritation this time. "What is your problem Asuka?"

"You, obviously! Your brain must be denser than I thought" she answered.

"I'm not even doing anything to you!" he rebuked.

"And there's the problem! Pretending you're such a good little boy that could do no wrong. It just pisses me off!" she snapped.

"Asuka, please just leave me alone-" he began.

"Running away again I see, typical" she interrupted.

"Go away!" he snapped, turning back to face the sink.

"Oh, are you getting angry?" she goaded. "I thought good little Shinji was such a kind and forgiving person, where's your sorry?" she mocked.

His neck tightened, he felt like he was being backed into a corner. "Seriously Asuka, could you just-"

"Go to hell! Stop with the act already! You are just like your damn father, manipulating everyone else, especially Misato. You make everyone give you special treatment just by trying to be a good little boy all the time. It's all so fake! I'm sick of everyone praising you and your high sync ratio, you are just a piece of trash!" Asuka shouted angrily.

Something inside Shinji just snapped, he hated his father and she hit low comparing him to that despicable man. Full of rage, he turned around screaming and shoved the girl away.

"What the hell?!" Asuka yelled, ready to pound her fists into him.

Shinji started moving towards her and Asuka's face quickly changed to shock. "What are you-" she started, backing away.

Surprised at her sudden reversal, he noticed she was staring at his hand. The boy looked down and noticed a knife in his hand… when had he grabbed it? Was he losing it? He looked back at her, feeling a bit of satisfaction at seeing the fear in her eyes; she too could be afraid, feel panic similar to his when she was angry with him.

"You want me to drop my act, right?!" he shouted, brandishing the knife.

The redhead hesitated with responding, a little shocked at his behaviour. She was desperately trying to keep her calm.

"Where is all your bullshit now?!" he yelled moving closer to her, his mind was just a haze, unable to think rationally anymore.

"Don't you dare come near me!" she warned.

Unfortunately the girl stumbled as she backed away, and Shinji used this opportunity to swing the knife at her. Asuka instinctively jumped back as he swung the knife, the blade cutting across her torso, easily slicing her shirt and cutting a little into her flesh. She cried at the sudden pain and clutched around her abdomen, blood dripping onto her hands. It wasn't a serious wound but if Shinji continued his wild attacks, that wouldn't last long.

Adrenalin pumped through the girl's veins as she called on her combat training, throwing a kick to Shinji's hand. Luckily for her, it knocked the knife right out of his hand; a loud clang rang out as the metal hit the hard surface of the kitchen floor.

Still full of wrath, Shinji charged into the girl and grabbed her throat with both hands, attempting to strangle her. Asuka instinctively grabbed at his arms, trying to stop him choking her.

"S-Stop-" she croaked, just barely able to make a sound as he was crushing her windpipe.

Seeing her vision start to fade, she used the last ounce of strength she had to kick the boy in the shins. The pain was enough for the boy to let her go as he shouted in pain. Asuka quickly went to move away, gasping for air. Noticing what she was doing, he reached out to grab her before she got away only managing to grab her shirt which was already half torn from the knife earlier. The force of her moving away ripped the rest of the fabric off, causing her to tumble to the floor. The boy stared at her state of undress; her top half completely exposed as she hadn't been wearing a bra, another feeling rising up in him. Just below her breasts, was the red gash he had inflicted earlier.

Sitting up and still struggling to breathe, Asuka covered her chest with her arm, embarrassed at her exposure.

Hesitating no longer, Shinji rapidly went over to the vulnerable girl, getting on top of her before she could stand up. With only one arm free, Asuka wasn't able to stop him straddling her and he forced her down onto the floor, using his weight to keep her pinned.


"What the fuck are you doing?!" she said hoarsely, struggling against the boy. She used both her arms to attempt to push him off, momentarily ignoring her exposed chest.

"It should be obvious, since you call me a hentai all the time" he said coldly. The anger and lust taking over him.

"Let me go, you sick bastard!" she demanded.

In response he punched her in the gut, winding her. The girl grunted in pain both from being winded and from the wound in her abdomen, unable to form any words as she struggled to breathe again. Shinji used the opportunity to move in between her legs and then moved her arms above her head, holding them both down with one hand, while the other was free. He then proceeded to roughly fondle her exposed breasts.

The redhead struggled against his ministrations, wiggling and squirming under his hold. 'How can this be happening to me?' she thought.

"S-Stop" Asuka managed, her voice sounding rough. Her body was worn and exhausted from the fighting. With Shinji's weight on top of her, she had been unable to force him off and her struggles against him were only tiring her further.

Shinji ignored her and just continued feeling up her breasts, painfully handling them.

"Stop already!" she said louder, trying to free her arms. "I swear you'll regret this"

"And why should I? Apparently I was just pretending to be good. Aren't I acting like the perverted baka you always say I am?" he mocked. "Besides there's nothing you can do about it"

Asuka started to panic; he really wasn't going to stop. Seeing the look of panic on the girl's face made him smirk slightly, glad that she was finally feeling hurt and helplessness similar to what he felt with her abuse towards him.

"Shinji, think about this, you don't know what you're doing" she said desperately.

"What do you know?! I just can't stand your bullshit anymore" he replied pinching her nipple, causing her to squeal.

"There are plenty of other ways to stand up for yourself baka!" she responded frantically. "You can't do this!"

"Just shut up already!" he said pinching her other nipple hard, growing tired of her antics. The girl let out a small cry of pain, jerking a little but otherwise stayed silent.

"That's much better" he said at her silence.

"Stop, please…" she pleaded.

"It's too late to act nice Asuka" he shot back with finality.

With that, Shinji started sucking one nipple with his mouth while his hand fondled her other breast. Though he wanted to hurt her, making her "enjoy" this would cause its own torment for Asuka too. Surprised at the contact of his soft tongue on her nipple, Asuka shuddered. The boy was driving her mad, sucking her nipple and then sliding his tongue around it in circles. She couldn't believe she was being sullied like this in her own residence, by her roommate and there was no one there to help her. No matter how much she struggled, he just continued on without stopping.

"Stop violating me you freak!" Asuka shouted, disgusted at the feeling of his saliva all over her breast.

In anger, Shinji brought his hand around her neck and squeezed it painfully. The girl panicked again, fearing he would choke her again and stopped resisting; he clearly wasn't able to be reasoned with currently. Seeing her compliance, Shinji then released her neck and brought his hand back down, rubbing her nipple in between his thumb and index finger. Asuka could feel herself getting aroused and wet with Shinji's actions and was disgusted at her body's response. There was no way she would give in to him, there was no way she would admit any of this felt pleasurable. With that, the girl bit down on her tongue so she could only feel the pain.

At this point the boy started to move his hand down her body, replacing it with his mouth as he moved it onto her other nipple, all erect and waiting for attention. Asuka could not help letting out a gasp as his mouth engulfed her other sensitive bud.

"You're enjoying this…" he remarked.

"The hell I am!" she refuted.

The boy slipped his roaming hand under her skirt and rubbed her pussy through her panties, feeling the dampness there.

"Gahh, what are you doing?" she gasped.

"Checking what your body says" he replied, continuing to rub her through her panties.

The girl started wriggling again, trying to get his hand away from her nether region. "Get off me! Stop this!"

Asuka couldn't take it; this boy was freely touching her most private region. She squirmed and struggled even more as he continued the forbidden contact but found herself helpless against his onslaught; she just couldn't break free.

"Get your filthy hands off of me!" she shrieked, unable to contain her desperation and frustration.

"Your wet panties suggest otherwise Asuka" he responded, feeling the dampness on his fingers.

"Get fucked you mmphh-" she started, getting cut off by Shinji's mouth.

The boy had gotten irritated with her constant bickering and had decided to just silence her with his lips; besides he wanted to pay her back for the last time she kissed him. Asuka looked at him shocked, but soon began fighting against him once more. She made a displeased grunt as he pushed his lips onto hers roughly and she forcefully turned her face to the side to get his mouth off her, causing Shinji to pull back.

"How dare you! Don't ever do that again!" Asuka yelled, spitting on him.

"But I was just bored Asuka" he replied cruelly.

"Get lost you prick!" she rebuked.

Shinji just continued his assault down below, much to Asuka's dismay, and slipped his finger into her panties, caressing her outer folds. He felt her whole body shake with the contact.

"Stop it! You are never meant to touch me there!" Asuka shouted, finding it hard to concentrate.

Having faced him again, Shinji brought his lips down on hers yet again. The girl let out muffled cries of anguish as his fingers stroked her private region, disgusted at the feeling of being violated both below and on her mouth. Again, Asuka forcefully turned her face away, starting to feel sick at being unable to stop him doing whatever he wanted.

Suddenly the boy pushed a finger into her wet pussy, making her cry out as she arched her back. Her erotic moan sent a shiver down the boy's spine, just making him more determined.

"No…No! Remove your finger…Oh God…" she said struggling to move away, but to no avail, she was trapped between him and the floor, unable to close her legs.

Taking pleasure from Asuka's reaction, Shinji started moving his finger in and out of her, causing the girl to let out little erotic noises as she tried her best to halt his finger's movement. Much to her distress, Shinji added a second finger and began thrusting a little harder into her nether region.

"Fucking hell! S-Stop it Shinji…please!" she managed to say.

"Your cunt is leaking non-stop. You should be more honest" he replied, smirking.

"Fuck off you disgusting pervert!" she shouted with effort.

Shinji relished the power he currently had over the girl. She was unable to stop him, her struggles growing weaker as he continued; both from the stimulation and her exhaustion. The boy used his thumb to rub her clitoris forcefully while he thrust into her with his fingers. The redhead cried out erotically, unable to hold it back; the stimulation of her clit sending jolts of pleasure through her body. Asuka tried closing her legs or shaking her arms free, unable to take it.

"Nnnnn…No! Stop!" she barely managed to say, fighting back tears.

"You already know I'm not going to" Shinji replied, no hesitation in his actions.

Asuka was growing weaker and weaker as he continued to attack her vagina relentlessly. She was already on the verge of climaxing, her breaths becoming quicker and her body momentarily stopping all its resistance. The boy rubbed her clitoris vigorously, finally granting her release as Asuka screamed in orgasm for the first time in her life. Her body arched with the orgasm, her pussy drenching Shinji's hand in her cum. Coming down from the wave of pleasure, she started panting heavily, exhausted from the struggle and the climax. Sweat covered both teens' bodies.

"I see you enjoyed that Asuka" Shinji commented.

"Just shut up and leave me alone… you've already defiled me" she retorted, out of breath.

"Not just yet, I haven't had my turn" he replied.

The girl looked up at him perplexed, exhausted and still not thinking straight. Shinji yanked her panties down and pulled them all the way down her legs and off. Asuka shivered as she felt air on her exposed crotch, closing her legs now that Shinji had moved away. The boy unbuckled his pants and slipped them off together with his boxers, freeing his erection. Asuka just stared in revulsion, realisation dawning on her at what he was about to do. The girl quickly tried to get up, but Shinji had grabbed her legs and pulled, causing Asuka to fall back down landing on her back painfully. Using the opportunity, the boy forcefully pushed her legs apart and moved in between them. Again, he pinned her to the ground and held her arms above her head.

"Mein Gott! You can't do that to me, you just can't. Oh God I don't deserve this" Asuka said panicking, trying to wriggle free.

"You don't deserve this? Well you sure think highly of yourself. After all you've done to make those around you suffer, especially me!" he replied angrily.

"Whatever it is you think I've done to you, this payback is insane!" she retorted, her anger flaring. Her comments just poured more fuel on the fire.

"What I THINK you've done? Are you for real?! Ever since I've returned it's been hell!" he shouted, pinching one of her nipples painfully. Asuka gritted her teeth from the sharp pain, realising her poor choice of words just made the situation worse. Thoughts raced through her head, wondering what she could do to make him stop.

"I didn't mean it like that-" she started.

"I don't care" he interrupted. "You've already shown your true colours"

"Please don't… I beg you…" she pleaded. She didn't want to beg, but she was running out of options, the boy was becoming even more determined to punish her.

"You could at least try to sound sincere" he said scoffing, fondling her breast roughly. "Asuka doesn't beg"

The girl felt helpless; even resorting to begging had backfired. She fought back tears as he started to move his cock closer to her vagina. She tried wrestling her arms free or pushing herself away with her feet but it only served to delay him shortly and tire her further.

The redhead felt a lump in her throat, there was one last thing she could do; apologise to him. The thought of saying sorry for her treatment towards him appalled her. It was something almost impossible for her to do normally, let alone in light of all that was transpiring. She swallowed thickly, opening and closing her mouth, it had to be now or never. However, the girl ended up exhaling in irritation, she just couldn't do it; it would justify everything he had done to her. A single tear escaped down her cheek as she steeled herself, unnoticed by the boy.

At this point, Shinji felt her struggles weaken and he moved to position his stiff member. Asuka looked away, unable to watch; not wanting to see his face, nor him rape her. Shinji placed his cock at the entrance to her pussy and she gasped as she felt it make contact with her sensitive skin. The boy paused and looked at Asuka momentarily; she still looked so defiant. A small part of him wanted to stop, but it was completely overwhelmed by his all-consuming rage; she needed to pay.

Shinji fought the urge to ram into her; pain was something Asuka easily dealt with, no, he wanted this to last as long as possible. He pressed forward into her, eliciting a grunt from her.

"W-wait! Wait!" she said stalling; still in disbelief at what was about to happen.

Shinji ignored her and pushed in deeper, finally inside her.

"Ahhh" she let out, not prepared for the pain of being penetrated.

He pulled out and pushed back in further, the feeling of her pussy engulfing him unlike anything he had ever felt. He slowly began to build a rhythm as he got used to the movement, getting in deeper with each thrust.

"You're taking my virginity you dickhead…" Asuka said croakily, just wishing it would be over soon.

"You're taking mine as well" he replied with a smirk.

The girl just spat on him with disgust and he continued on. By now Shinji had his whole cock inside her, painfully stretching her open. He looked at Asuka, her face contorted with pain.

"Stop, stop, it hurts, stop!" she protested; it was futile but she couldn't help it.

"This is far from over" he rebuked, not granting her any reprieve.

Shinji couldn't hold himself back anymore and increased his pace as his lust took over. Exasperated at being unable to close her legs as his cock repeatedly sank into her, Asuka's resistance began anew as she tried to struggle free. Asuka managed to finally free her arms from his grasp and threw a punch at his head. Shinji reflexively moved his head back, making her blow land on his chin. He barely flinched and instead pressed down hard on her shoulders in anger, using them as leverage to thrust into her harder. The girl started scratching at his arms, anything to stop him, but he didn't care. The boy felt thrilled, as his cock was in heaven. Her vagina was so tight as well as hot and wet.

"Ahhhh…Ahhh" Asuka cried out in pain. The redhead found herself unable to suppress any noises anymore from his increased pace as his cock repeatedly thrust into her pussy.

Asuka hated being unable to stop him, she hated that it was starting to feel pleasurable. At this point, she could no longer think coherently with him pounding into her.

Shinji noticed that Asuka was no longer crying out in pain as she got used to him and instead started to let out small cries of pleasure.

"Oh…Oh…Oh God…Oh…Oh…"

Each of Asuka's moans made him twitch; it was somewhat arousing that he was making her feel good. He had wanted to hurt her, but that was irrelevant now; the pleasure and lust he was feeling overrode everything. He picked up his speed and her moans grew louder. Shinji could feel he was quite close already.

"Fuck you Shinji…fuck…you! I'm gonna fucken cum…you fucking asshole!" Asuka shouted in helplessness.

Shinji just renewed his efforts, using one hand to fondle her breast and grunting in exertion as he fucked her. With one of her shoulders free now, she grabbed his hair painfully but she was already on the verge. With the next thrust Asuka came, letting out a loud scream. Her inner walls closed around the boy's cock and she dug her nails into his back as she orgasmed. With all this Shinji burst inside her, releasing his warm sticky semen, after which he collapsed on top of her panting. Heavy perspiration covered both teens.

"Oww…" Shinji grimaced as he came down from his high, suddenly feeling all the wounds she had given him.

"I can't believe you Shinji, you deflowered me, I'll never be a virgin again" Asuka spat angrily.

"Did you already forget what started this?" Shinji retorted.

"Fuck off you damn psycho, don't ever come near me again" Asuka snapped, shoving him off of her at last.

Shinji's rage was slowly dissipating, as his pent-up anger had been released. His hesitation was returning, his rational thinking as well.

Asuka moved to get up and winced in pain, Shinji realised she must be extremely sore. All the revenge he had wanted was slowly being replaced by concern for the girl as the events began replaying in his head.

The boy stood up slowly, unable to believe what had just happened. Did he really do that to her? Since when did he ever do something so unlike him? Even now, despite him seeing Asuka laying on the floor, her cunt wide open and his cock covered in her secretions, it still felt so unreal. The boy's eyes moved down to her vagina once again and he noticed how red her pussy was; it seemed he really went rough on her at the end. He then noticed blood on her thighs and his eyes widened; it looked fresh. He moved his gaze up to her abdomen seeing the cut he had inflicted, feeling guilty; had he wanted to kill her? He could see the wound was covered with crusted up blood, the blood wasn't from there.

"H-Hey A-Asuka, are you ok? There's blood on your legs…" he asked, a little anxious. His soft tone feeling so alien after the ordeal.

The redhead just looked up at him with contempt. "Are you making fun of me? Do you want me to say 'you raped me' so badly?" Asuka replied.

"N-No… the blood looks fresh, it's not from where I cut you…" Shinji started, his throat feeling dry.

"Where do you think it's from stupid? I was a virgin or did you forget?" Asuka shot back scornfully.

The boy stayed silent; the impact of his actions was slowly starting to dawn on him. The girl stood up unsteadily and pulled her panties back up, not wanting to show him her defiled vagina anymore. Shinji realised he still had his pants down and pulled them back up, covering up his member once again. The boy looked back at Asuka, who was eyeing her torn shirt in irritation. The girl looked back at Shinji and glared at him with loathing, covering her chest with her arm.

[skip end]

"Are you happy now Shinji? Are you glad you made me suffer? Did it make you feel better?" Asuka asked angrily.

Truth be told, Shinji had felt great satisfaction at first, but now that it was over, he felt absolutely terrible. It made him think that maybe Asuka wasn't really getting enjoyment out of making him suffer either.

"I was just… I…" he started before closing his mouth, unable to say anything. He knew nothing he said could justify what he did anyway. He chose to look down at his hands instead. "I'm so fucked up…" he said aloud.

"That's a huge understatement!" Asuka yelled, moving angrily towards the boy.

Shinji looked up and saw her coming but did nothing to defend himself as the girl threw a punch at his face. The blow connected painfully on his jaw and he stumbled back. He looked up at her again, her anger still blazing and he slowly started to back away further into the kitchen where it all started. The boy clumsily slipped as he was backing away.

"Owww" he let out as he landed on the floor on his back. He quickly looked up, seeing the redhead moving towards him and fear started to overcome him. He caught a glint of metal in his peripheral vision and looked towards it, seeing the knife he had brandished at her earlier.

Asuka followed his line of sight and quickly moved on top of him her eyes full of rage, grabbing the knife and holding it above the boy's head. Shinji couldn't hide the fear on his face; terrified that she was going to kill him, he didn't dare utter a word.

"I want to kill you! How could you?! How could you do that to me Shinji?!" Asuka shouted, her hand shaking as she held the knife dangerously close to his face.

'So…this is how it ends…' he thought, closing his eyes. 'After all that, it's the least I deserve anyway…'

"No comeback?! No blaming me?!" she continued angrily, slapping his face with her other hand not caring about covering her chest for the moment.

Shinji opened his eyes again at the pain and stared into her eyes, unable to defend himself, unable to talk back. The knife was so close to his face, he was afraid to move at all.

The two stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity before Asuka angrily threw the knife away, shouting obscenities and getting off the boy; she couldn't do it. Shinji let out the breath he was holding while she slammed her fist on the table as hard as she could before turning to face him.

"As much as I want to kill you Shinji, I'm not like you. Besides, Misato and NERV would not listen to one word I say after they found you dead at my hands" she said nastily, her anger slowly dying down. "You know all those things I said about you, I guess they were true after all" she spat; the words digging into Shinji like a knife. "I feel sick looking at you" she finished, turning her head away before starting to move away.

Shinji stood there frozen, watching her retreating figure. He couldn't help noticing her current state; she was all red and covered in sweat, her skirt was stained with her wetness and her beautiful red hair was all frizzled.

"Asuk-" he started, then stopped immediately; he didn't want to anger her further.

Asuka stopped and turned back to look at him.

"What do you want?" she shot back venomously.

The boy hesitated at the spite in her voice. He cursed himself for calling out, he knew he had to say something now.

"Y-You're umm… I made you all messy… err I think you should clean yourself up" he suggested lamely.

Her eye twitched at him. "Are you telling me what to do huh?!" she snapped at him. "You just want to hide the evidence!"

"No!" he said quickly "No… just look at yourself" he said timidly.

Asuka looked at herself and saw she did indeed look disastrous. She let out a string of German curses at the boy, before turning around and walking off to her room. After a couple minutes of rustling, she came back out with new clothes, went to the shower and slammed the door. The sound resonated throughout the suddenly quiet apartment. Shinji looked at his hands, still unable to come to terms with what he had done. He had used these hands to hold her down and violate her. How could he possibly get so angry to go that far?

The boy snapped out of his daze and turned to look at the knife that he had almost been stabbed with. He picked it up and went to the sink, washing the blood off. After this, he took out a rag and wiped the blood stains and mess off the floor, making sure the place looked clean again. The boy spotted Asuka's torn shirt on the floor and picked it up, still thinking about what had just happened. The torn clothes reminded himself that he too was in need of a shower and cleanup. He was also covered in injuries from the ordeal. Shinji deposited the torn shirt into the wastebasket before going to his room, getting some clean clothes ready and laying down on his bed waiting for Asuka to finish.

'Damn it! How could this happen?' the redhead thought.

Asuka had entered the bathroom, stripping out of her dirty clothes with disgust and proceeded to have a shower immediately. She felt a little better as she felt the hot water run over her body, cleaning her of the taint Shinji had left on her. The girl made sure to wash herself thoroughly, not wanting anything of the incident to remain.

'How could he? How could he do this to me? How pathetic I must be to not have been able to stop him… why does the bad shit always happen to me?' Asuka thought angrily.

The girl beat her fists against the shower panel, unable to believe what she had just endured.

'He damn raped me without hesitation… since when did the Invincible Shinji become my enemy instead of my saviour…?'

The girl shook the last thought out of her head, not wanting to think about it anymore. Asuka wanted to make him pay, but that was partly what had started this in the first place. She just felt so weak now. She considered telling Misato but it just seemed far too daunting; it was so embarrassing and her pride had suffered enough. The girl was immensely irritated that at the end her body had finally given in to him, that she had experienced pleasure from his wicked actions. The redhead made an annoyed noise before turning off the water and exiting the shower. Asuka then proceeded to dry herself before changing into her new clothes and then exiting the bathroom.

After about half an hour of waiting, Asuka finally came out of the bathroom. Hearing the bathroom door open and close, Shinji picked up his clothes and exited his room, just noticing Asuka walking into her room and slamming the door shut. The boy sighed, having had time to think to himself made him feel worse. Shinji knew what he had done was appalling, but he was so out of control at the time. Nothing good had come of his actions, not that he had expected something. Asuka was angrier, her defences up even more, he felt awful and everything was back to square one. There were so many other things he could have done to stand up to her, this had to be the worst choice of them all.

Shinji entered the bathroom, took off his clothes and went into the shower turning on the water. He soon noticed all the hot water was gone, but he didn't mind having a cold shower at the moment. After the shower, he dried himself up and put on his new clothes. The boy then exited the bathroom and looked at the clock, noticing it was getting late. 'How much time passed? Did it really go by that fast?' he thought.

He decided to make supper and went back into the kitchen to start. Not too long ago Asuka had come up to him here, before everything went downhill; it was still so incomprehensible. Shinji briefly wondered when Misato would get home. If their guardian had been here, he definitely wouldn't have gone so far, not that he was putting any blame on her. What would Misato do when she found out what happened? It was scary to think about, he should tell her, but how could he tell her? He was too much of a coward to bring up such shameful conduct. It would also hurt him deeply if his only ally in the home hated him.

Pushing his ponderings out of mind, he started making the meal. Preparing the food momentarily took his mind off the current situation and put him slightly more at ease. He really didn't know how to deal with what had happened or what Asuka would do.

As he was making supper, the front door opened and in entered Misato. The Major was completely unaware of what had just happened in this household as she walked towards the living room.

"I'm home!" Misato cried out.

"Welcome home Misato" Shinji replied.

The purple haired woman went to the kitchen and poked her head inside to see Shinji working on their supper.

"Mmmm what smells so nice?" Misato asked, a blissful smile on her face. She had been looking forward to Shinji's home cooked meal all day.

"I'm making supper" Shinji answered. The boy was a little nervous with her presence, it felt like any moment she was going to find out what happened.

The Major turned her head around and found the other roommate nowhere in sight. "Where's Asuka?" she asked, turning to face Shinji again.

"She's in her room" he answered hesitantly.

"Oh?" Misato said curiously.

"Don't worry about her Misato, supper's almost ready anyways" Shinji said quickly. The boy had no idea what state Asuka was in and didn't think she wanted to be disturbed.

"Well, I'm sure food will cheer her up! I'll tell her supper's ready for you" Misato said happily.

"There's really no need-" Shinji started.

"Asuka! Supper's ready!" Misato shouted.

It only took a moment for the redhead to reply. "Leave me alone!" Asuka shouted in return.

"There you see, Misato let's just-" Shinji began.

"Come on Asuka. Are you sure you're not hungry?" Misato shouted back at the redhead, cutting Shinji off.

"I'm not in the mood!" Asuka shouted.

"Then just come sit with us, I haven't seen you all day!" Misato replied.

"Fine! Whatever! If it'll make you shut up, I'll come eat" Asuka answered angrily.

They could hear the young girl cursing and mumbling as her door opened. The female eva pilot came into the dining room and sat down, ignoring both of them. As she had just taken a shower, she looked completely clean, her red hair shimmering in the light; there was no way their guardian could tell what had happened. There was a slight bruising on Asuka's neck from the momentary strangulation, but it was so faint you had to be really looking to see it, while her shirt covered the shallow cut on her abdomen. Misato went and sat down next to the redhead as she waited for supper to be finished. The young girl made an annoyed noise but didn't move or say anything. The Major could see that Asuka was definitely in a bad mood.

Before she could say anything, Shinji came into the dining room with their meal and set it down on the table. He quickly moved to the opposite side of the table and sat down. Misato noticed some light bruising on his face from where Asuka had landed her punches.

"Are you alright Shinji? Your face is a little bruised" Misato asked, concerned.

"I-It's nothing Misato really! I just walked into… the door… I'm fine, so let's eat" Shinji said weakly.

"Stop acting so timidly you two-faced son of a bitch!" Asuka shouted angrily.

"Whoa calm down Asuka" Misato said, surprised at her outburst.

Shinji on the other hand just avoided the redhead's gaze and just picked up his utensils. The young girl noticed his actions and just grew more infuriated. She stood up from her chair abruptly and picked up her meal, ready to throw it at him. The purple haired woman moved in to stop her.

"What's wrong Asuka?" Misato asked, a little concerned with her behaviour.

Asuka turned to face Misato. "Shinji's a sick bastard who won't leave this house!" she answered.

Shinji just wanted to disappear, of course he knew Asuka would not tolerate his presence currently. He also felt sick having Misato showing concern towards him; it just felt so wrong, Asuka was the one in strife.

Their guardian looked between the two of them; Asuka was clearly livid and Shinji was just quietly sitting there not saying a word.

"Did you have a bad day Asuka?" Misato asked, not realising how trivialising it sounded.

"Horrible day! As if you even care, you only worry about that baka over there!" the redhead snapped.

Misato sighed. "Of course I care about you Asuka, I care about both of you. And despite what you say, Shinji cares about you too"

Shinji felt a pang of guilt at her words, he just wished Misato would stop.

"Yeah fucking right! That asshole doesn't give a fuck" she spat angrily.

Misato gave up; she figured Asuka was just in another one of her moods, being angry with Shinji like she always was. The woman supposed living in the same house would grow annoying after a while and decided it was probably best to just let it blow over. The Major wondered if they would ever behave nice to each other.

"Asuka, I know you don't always get along with Shinji, but I don't wanna deal with this now. Just eat ok?" Misato said tiredly.

Asuka sat back down without another word and began eating her meal, just wanting to get it over and done with. Shinji also began eating without a word and Misato watched the two teens as they both avoided each other's gaze. The silence was unnerving as no one said a word. Finding it awkward and wanting to know if anything had happened between the two, Misato broke the unfriendly silence.

"So umm… what did you guys do today?" the older woman asked tentatively.

"Nothing" they both replied in unison, remnant of their sync training.

Both teens returned to their meal in silence. It was obvious to Misato she would get nothing from them today. Shinji was slightly relieved that Asuka was not going to announce what had happened. He couldn't understand why though, just moments before she had been yelling angrily about him, it felt like she was just about to tell Misato everything. For now, there was no point dwelling on it any further.

Asuka soon finished her meal and stood up, going straight to her room, not even bothering to put her dirty dish in the sink.

"Goodnight Asuka" Misato said aloud as the redhead walked away. Asuka just grunted in response.

Misato finished her meal next, standing up and depositing her and Asuka's plate into the sink. The Major went over to the fridge, took out a beer and gulped it down. As it was pretty late Misato decided she would go to sleep, her two wards weren't in any mood to talk anyway.

"Goodnight Shinji" Misato said to the boy as she walked out of the kitchen.

"Goodnight Misato" he replied.

The woman went to her room, leaving the boy alone in the dining room. Soon, Shinji had finished his meal and went back into the kitchen to finish washing the dishes.

Suddenly, the house seemed extremely quiet. As Misato had switched off all the lights except for the kitchen and dining room when she went to sleep, it felt like Shinji was surrounded by darkness. The hot water from the tap did little to relax him as he washed the dishes. Finishing up, the boy then proceeded to switch off the lights and go to his room. As the house was plunged into darkness, Shinji felt a little uneasy as he made his way to his bedroom.

Entering his room, he went straight to his bed, wanting nothing more than to go to sleep and take his mind off what had happened. As much as he tried, the boy could not fall asleep. Shinji felt greatly ashamed, the real impact of his actions had finally settled in; he had done something unforgiveable. His mind was wide awake, he couldn't help constantly tossing and turning in his bed; the guilt made him restless. Realising he wouldn't get to sleep for a while, the boy got out of bed.

The only thing that could put him at ease would be paying Asuka a visit and as such he crept out of his room, so as not to wake Misato, and snuck to the redhead's door. Shinji didn't dare knock as he slipped open her door and went inside. Closing the door behind him, he looked at Asuka's bed. Shinji could see she was awake, but she hadn't noticed him come in. He walked across the room and sat down on the edge of her bed. At this, she looked up and saw him.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she hissed.

"I came to discuss what happened… I should start with an apolo-" he started.

"What?! You are so unbelievable! What does saying sorry do now? Nothing can fix what you've done! Do you think I'd forgive you?!" Asuka spat, her voice rising a little.

"B-But I j-just…" Shinji said frantically.

"Will you just shut up and get out of here! Are you fucking brain dead? Why the fuck would I want to talk to someone who raped me?!" she almost shouted.

"I-I know, I know… but if I don't say anything now, this will never be resolved" he replied.

"You think this can be resolved?! You crazy fuck, you went way past the point of no return… I even begged you to stop…" she shot back.

"Yes you're right! I-I just got so angry and lost control" Shinji said, tears threatening to run down his cheek. "I never intended to inflict such things on you!"

"I can't believe how pathetic you are! Take responsibility for your actions!" she rebuked, turning away from him.

Asuka noticed he had reverted to his timid self again; she was somewhat relieved but also irritated. If something positive could have come out of this horror, it would have been that she no longer had to listen to his wimpy rambling, but even that had returned. During the ordeal he didn't stumble over his words or say sorry, whereas now he just sounded like a crybaby. It also pissed her off that he was trying to make it seem like it wasn't his fault.

"I… listen… what I did… it was inexcusable and things between us will never be the same again…" he started. Images of him holding her down, fondling her breasts and thrusting into her flooded into his head; he had seen and touched so much of her. His shook his head, trying his best to think of what he could say.

"… in many ways… but we are still both eva pilots… and we're living together. It will be impossible if we don't talk about this…"

"You shoulda thought about that before you went apeshit!" Asuka replied.

Shinji paused momentarily. "How is your… wound… where I cut you?" he asked, trying to keep the conversation going but also concerned.

"What, as opposed to my neck where you almost choked me to death? Or my breasts? Or my whole body?!" she retorted.

"All of it… wherever I hurt you…" he replied.

"The damage wasn't only physical! I can't believe… I can't believe… you did that to me…" she said, a sadness in her voice.

"What… hurts the most?" he asked, not really sure if he wanted to hear the answer.

Asuka's momentary softness disappeared as she replied. "Fucking whatever, I don't whine and moan about all the bad shit that's happened to me, I can't change it! Just drop it"

"I… I just want to make it better somehow… even if only a little" he replied, lightly touching her back.

The girl turned to lay on her back and faced him. "Did I say you could touch me?" she snapped. "Nothing you can do will make it better" she continued. "Why are you so insistent?"

"I told you… there is so much we do together… I've always wanted us to get along… that's part of why it all hurt so much with you after I had returned from being absorbed…" he explained.

A tiny bit of remorse came to Asuka as she recalled her treatment of him. "Fine! Seriously, you are so damn annoying"

She grabbed his hand and lifted up her shirt and placed his hand on her wound. "This is where you sliced me, the cut is shallow and it's been cleaned up. You damn tried to kill me…"

Shinji was surprised by her actions but didn't resist her. He could feel the small line where the blade had cut into her flesh. He was so close to her now he could smell the soap and shampoo on Asuka from her shower. The girl moved his hand out from her shirt and onto her chest.

"You were never supposed to touch me here, they are still sensitive and in pain. You are a sick pervert…" she continued.

The boy didn't dare move his hand in such a risky spot and made sure his hand was limp. Asuka moved his hand up to her neck. "You choked me with no hesitation here. I have some bruising and it still hurts. You really tried to kill me…"

Shinji felt sick as he recalled wrapping his hands round her throat, he can't imagine how horrifying it must have been for her. Finally, Asuka moved his hand just above her private region.

"Here… you raped me… you painfully penetrated me… I am still sore… I am still violated… you did something unforgiveable…" she finished.

Shinji didn't know what to think or do. He felt so dreadful and at the same time aroused. His hands had inflicted so much pain on her, and he had received much physical pleasure at the same time. Why was she doing this? She could have just said the words to him.

His mind was racing and he just decided to go with the flow. Shinji slowly moved his hand under her shirt and caressed the wound gently.

"I'm glad this didn't become something serious… I don't want you to die…" he began.

He moved his hand out from her shirt and onto her chest, lightly resting his hand on her breast. "I was very rough here… a sick pervert indeed…"

The girl watched him intently and Shinji's hand began to shake. She hadn't yet fought back, he figured it was best to continue and he brought his hand to her neck.

"I… I was so irrational… I'm glad you kicked me… that there wasn't any permanent damage… I really don't want you to die…" he continued.

Shinji moved his hand over her private region. "I should never have done this… I should have at least been gentle… I can't change what happened… but… I can make it feel good…" he finished, resting his hand on her crotch, causing a sharp intake of breath from the girl.

"What… are you doing…?" she asked.

The boy just stayed silent, not moving his hand nor taking it off.

"This… is so wrong…" she continued. "But I… I just don't care anymore…" she said pressing his hand into her. Asuka was disgusted at her body's arousal, still felt animosity towards the boy, but at the moment her mind was blank. She just wanted pleasure, she just wanted to forget the pain, she just wanted to forget what happened.

Shinji was surprised at her response, but didn't want to keep her waiting and rubbed her gently, causing her to moan softly. He then reached under her skirt and pulled her panties down, before returning his hand to her now exposed pussy. The boy rubbed his fingers against her slit, feeling a slight wetness there, Asuka shuddered at the contact. Shinji then used his index finger to rub her clit in circles, making Asuka arch her back, her pussy getting more wet.

The boy got onto the bed and moved in between the girl's legs before bringing his mouth down onto her lower lips. Immediately, he started licking up and down her slit; after Asuka's shower, her vagina was cleaned of all previous activities. After such violence earlier, the redhead couldn't understand why her body didn't flinch or resist Shinji's actions.

Asuka moaned a little louder as he continued his actions; it felt unexpectedly pleasant. The boy took this as a sign to continue and begun playfully circling his tongue around her vagina lips, eliciting more moans from the redhead. Shinji could see she was getting very wet and decided to slip his tongue inside.

"Mmmmm!" she cried.

"Shhhhh, Misato could hear…" he whispered.

Asuka just looked up at him with a glare. "Don't fucking stop!"

The boy hastily continued, darting his tongue in and out of her, exploring her insides and licking her sensitive areas. The girl was getting closer and closer to the edge quite fast. Noticing this he stopped, giving himself a break. Asuka looked down at him questioningly and smacked him on the head impatiently.

"Oww" Shinji let out, realising he shouldn't stop for even a moment and started again but this time with a slower pace.

The small break and slower pace were enough that he had to build her up again. Asuka couldn't help slightly thrusting her pussy into Shinji's face, her desire to climax becoming stronger. Sensing that she was close again, the boy moved his mouth onto her swollen clit, attacking it relentlessly. The girl cried out in pleasure as he sucked and licked her sensitive bud. Asuka grabbed Shinji's head, pushing it against her, lost in the mindless pleasure.

The redhead finally screamed in orgasm, which she muffled with her pillow, shoving her vagina into the boy's face. The boy quickly drank her juices as she cummed into his face, stopping the movement of his tongue.

Finally, Asuka came down from her climax, sweating and panting. She couldn't believe that it had felt so good. As Shinji moved to start again, the redhead kicked him away.

"No more" she said sternly.

Shinji obediently moved away and Asuka pulled up her panties to cover herself once again. The two of them stayed silent not really knowing what to say, both wondering what the hell just happened. Shinji feared any words would break the momentary calm between them. He also felt an intense desire to achieve his own release where his mouth had just been, but held himself back knowing that it would be incredibly foolish and unkind.

Asuka's mind returned to reality, reminding her what Shinji had done to her, reminding her of the disgust she had towards him.

"Get out" she said firmly.

Shinji hesitated, shocked to have the silence broken by her telling him to leave.

"I want you to go!" she repeated. "I've said my piece, now leave me alone"

The male eva pilot stood up from her bed this time, not wanting to anger her. He had to say something, but what could he say?

"Well… goodnight Asuka" he said softly, deciding to play it safe.

"Goodnight already, piss off!" she responded.

After that, he walked out of her room and snuck back into his own room. Shinji was bewildered at how events had transpired, unable to make sense of it nor really understand what the outcome was. However, he did feel a lot better now that he had spoken his mind and shown his regret to her. As he lay down on his bed and closed his eyes, he found himself getting to sleep with much less difficulty.

Back in Asuka's room, a war waged inside the girl's head. What should she do with the current situation? What should she do with that idiot? What should she say to Misato? It was all so confusing. The visit Shinji paid her gave her mixed feelings. It was good that he didn't justify his actions and genuinely seemed to regret his actions; though that was far from sufficient to excuse him. In the latter part of their conversation, he had been much less pathetic and Asuka agreed that with all the interactions they had - work, school, home life – they had to work something out, whatever that something was, perhaps even sending him to jail.

While it was a step in the right direction, he still deserved retribution, he didn't deserve her forgiveness. A flush came across her face as she recalled what had just happened, the afterglow still felt; Shinji had relieved much of her sexual frustration as much as she hated to admit it.

Asuka supposed she could use him a little bit; after all, she couldn't change what had happened so she might as well use it to her advantage. He had already seen and touched all of her, it just didn't matter anymore; it was only pathetic little Shinji, that idiotic small slip of a boy. Even if things went south for him, he wouldn't dare do anything against her now. She didn't at all like the fact that she was raped, but at least some of his pretense was gone.

Regardless, she wanted to make Shinji pay, but she supposed using him would serve as good enough revenge for now. Asuka silenced the war in her head and went to sleep.

End notes: Sorry for the first chapter being so dark, I originally said that I needed it to happen for the story to progress but I'm sure I could have thought of something else. In any case, I assure you this will be the only rape scene. This version of chapter one has quite a few differences to the original one, I'll leave the original up somewhere else if you wanted to read it.

All of you put off by this chapter well I'm not going to try to convince you to read further, I totally understand. I will put together a whole heap of my thoughts about all this which will come after the end of this story to explain how this story came about.

Chapter Summary: After Shinji snaps at Asuka, he proceeds to harm her and then rape her. After his actions, he feels deep regret for what he had done while Asuka is extremely furious at him. Misato arrives back home, but both Shinji and Asuka had already had a shower and so Misato doesn't know what happened. During supper, Misato tries to find out what happened as she notices their behaviour but is unsuccessful. As Asuka and Misato leave, Shinji is left alone. Shinji cannot get to sleep because he feels guilty and so goes and visits Asuka. There they have a small discussion and Shinji ends up giving Asuka oral sex and leaves, after which Asuka plans to use the situation to her advantage.