Summary: Very pregnant Lily has to pee but Sirius isn't having a good hair day, and has locked himself in the bathroom.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Jo owns it all because she's amazing.

Not On My Watch

a Siriusly Klutzy fic

Knock. Knock. Knock.

It was Lily's eighth month of pregnancy and she had to pee. Badly. Now, normally, she would just waltz into the bathroom, do her business, and get on with her day.

But not today.

Today, Sirius Black had decided to barricade himself in there, claiming that his hair just "wasn't right".

Knock. Knock. Knock!

"Lily! Just hold on a second!" Sirius shouted from the other side of the door. "It's just not right, today!"

"Sirius Black, if you don't get out of that bathroom this instant I'm going to wet myself!"

"It's almost there. The left side isn't being symmetrical."

Lily screamed and banged her head on the door.

"You do realize that there is an infant sitting on my bladder Sirius?"

"Just move it around a bit. He'll move. Problem solved."

Lily groaned. "I'm going to shave you bald!"

Sirius gasped.

"You wouldn't!"

"Watch me, Padfoot."

The door flew open.

"You would get rid of this?" he asked, shaking his hair in her face before slamming the door closed.

Click. And locking it.

"JAMES!" Lily bellowed down the hall. Her legs were crossed and her face was terrifying, a mix between wild and insane.

"Lily! What's wrong? It's not the baby, is it?"

Lily shook her head, looking at the bathroom door.

"It's your friend! He won't get out of the bathroom and I have to pee!"

James couldn't repress a smile.

James knocked on the door.


"What?" Sirius responded, exasperated.

"What are you doing?"

"My hair, Prongsie."

"Well, you see, my wife here really needs to use the loo."

"I know. She's been bothering me for the past quarter of an hour!"

"Well, do you think you could let her in? Just for a minute?"

"But my hair, Prongs! It's just not working for me today!"

"What if I make you Godfather of baby?" He looked at Lily and winked. Of course, Sirius Black being Godfather had been planned for quite some time now, they'd just been waiting to tell him.

The door, once again, flew open.

"Godfather? Really?" James nodded and Lily bolted into the bathroom before Sirius even had a chance to shut the door. She pushed him out and locked it with a click. "I'd get to teach him how to fly? And prank? And write his name in the snow?"

"It might be a girl," James reminded him.

"We all know it's a boy, Prongsie. Only Potter boys know how to tick Lily off that much. Making her have to pee, that's genius!"

A/n: Another moment of my procrastination where I decide to write instead of be useful. I hope you liked this and it's randomnosity. I know for a fact that pregnant women will do just about anything to get to the bathroom when that baby is on their bladder. Reviews are amazing! Thanks for reading, I hope you liked it!

Much love and some chocolate,

Siriusly Klutzy