Niechizuu Ziang Shi

"Thank Ryoga too," Ranma added, hopping down from the top of the lockers she was perched on.

"Oh, but..." Akane started, before having her question asked for her by Yuka and Sayuri

"Now that you mentioned it, what happened to him?"

Ranma felt obligated to mention the idiot was actually the pig in Akane's arms, having selflessly forgotten about his curse to jump in and save the short haired girl from drowning to death at the end of their ice skating match. Before the pigtailed girl could come up with an explanation, a faint knocking came from the wall next to her.

"WHAT THE?" Ranma proclaimed, leaping away as the 'faint knock' collapsed the wall inwards towards her.

The wall shattered inwards in a spectacular spray of concrete and wood, revealing a young woman with flowing white hair and seemly soft, peach fuzz like pale green skin, garbed a Chinese pantsuit with an overlaying leather brassiere that one suspected as armor.

"Ranma..." the girl's voice croaked with a malice and undisputable hatred, "You, I kill."

Despite the reactions of the other girls around her, Ranma remained non-plussed, perhaps even unamused. "Shampoo, what are you doing in Japan?" The pigtailed girl enquired, before slumping into the chair that was behind her.

"KILL" she repeated, presuming the red headed Japanese girl had trouble understanding her, she wasn't very proficient in Japanese, after all. And as many people who have problems communicating, she believed complimenting her statement with a visual reference was necessary.

Despite her courtesy, Ranma understood her well enough, as she pivoted her chair on one leg, turning her body away from the blow with the colorful, mace-like instrument of destruction, and stuck her leg out in the path of the obviously foreign girl with the peculiar bodily hair issue.

Ranma sighed, looking towards the heavens in a 'Why me?" expression, as the other girl fell flat on her face, before placing her foot on the small of the girl's back. "You know? I thought this woulda got old back in China."

"Y-You know her?" Akane enquired, watching the girl struggle under Ranma's foot, "And why are her feet bound like that?"

"Long story," Ranma commented, seeming to not have to put much effort in keeping the girl on the ground.

"Well, it's not like we have anything better to do than find out why she wants to pummel you into oblivion, Ranma," Akane stated, showing a slight concern for the girl.

Ranma sighed, knowing she would have to explain sooner or later, "Well, the gist of the story is, Shampoo here is dead."

"Um..." Sayuri began, "She looks rather lively to me."

"Well, yes, can you not interrupt me?" Ranma reprimanded, "I was just getting to that part."

"Sorry."


Ranma kept her foot in the air, as she watched her opponent sail off the challenge log; for a minute there, she was afraid that there would actually be a challenge to deal with. "Well, guess the prize is as good as mine, huh?"

"He is won!" Ranma and Genma's Chinese guide proclaimed, making it sound as if it weren't the best of things to do. The ref raised Ranma's hand in victory, just as Shampoo pulled herself off the ground, and approached the girl who defeated her...


"So she chased you all over China after giving you this 'Kiss of Death' huh?" Akane questioned, looking down at the girl who finally ceased her struggles after realizing how futile it was to fight her position.

"Yeah, and when they say 'to the very ends of the earth', they mean it... and then some..."

"And then some?" Yuka encouraged Ranma to continue, enrapped with the story.


"Damn it, Shampoo!" Ranma shouted, diving out of the way of Shampoo's monk spade, "I'm sorry already!"

"YOU I KILL!" Shampoo insisted, as she recovered her missed swing. Ranma rolled to standing, and found himself looking down the steep mountain they were fighting alongside. Her coward of a father had abandoned Ranma, telling him she needs to face his challenges on his own to be a true man, leaving Ranma to contend with a pride wounded and homicidal backwards hick.

Without too much time after recovering, Ranma dodged to the side away from the cliff to avoid the horizontal slash from Shampoo's staff weapon. With an ax kick, the redhead rent it into two halves. Shampoo stumbled, finding her footing near the edge, and beginning to slide off.

With panic in her eyes, the Chinese girl began to swim her arms in attempt to keep from going over the edge, before Ranma reached forward, and harshly pull her back onto the trail to the other side of her, away from the cliff. Desperately clasping onto Ranma, Shampoo trembled, realizing how close she had come to her demise.

"Hey, you okay?"

Shampoo blinked, realizing that the redhead was hugging her, and stepped away. With a sniffle as she attempted to refrain from tears, Shampoo nodded, while willing herself to stop trembling.

"Um.." Ranma wasn't sure how to handle the girl, knowing for one, she wanted her dead, and two, she was emotionally distraught, "Well, it's not like it did happen, I caught ya before you fell, so don't cry, alright?"

Shampoo calmed herself, giving a slight smile, signifying that she was feeling better. Ranma began to return the smile, and chuckled slightly. Shampoo began to feel the infectious laughter, and joined in as Ranma's own laughter picked up.

"DIE!"

Ranma just barely managed to duck the mace that had been heading towards her head. Shampoo, having heavily committed to the swing in an attempt to quickly behead the other girl, was thrown off balance, pulled over the other girl, and sent sailing over the edge of the trail.

"DAMN IT, SHAMPOO!!!"


Akane, Yuka, Sayuri, and P-chan all blinked, before looking down at the fuming foreign girl.

"That..."

"Wasn't very bright."

"Oink."

Akane rubbed her temples, trying to dismiss the stupidity of the apparent over endowed bimbo, "So, she was even more angry at you for falling off the cliff, and came after you even more determined after she healed, I guess?"

"Ah, heh... she didn't survive..."


"So, you'll return her to her village for us?" Ranma enquired to the Taoist monk.

The man nodded, and looked back at the body they had strapped to a bamboo rod, "Yes, it our sacred duty to return miss to home for burial. Spirit become homesick if not done so, and wreak havoc in attempt to return."

"Um... I guess," Ranma responded, not believing in ghost stories...


"What a surprise it was for me to find her, a week later, hopping after me and shouting 'YOU I KILL!" Ranma finished, "But, really, she didn't seem as terrifying as before..."

"You have an undead Chinese warrior after you, and that's not terrifying?" Akane asked, incredulously.

"Well, I guess death tends to take a certain edge from your skill," Ranma mused, "Also, her bound feet don't help much."

"So, what are you going to do about her?" Akane asked, "She'll just start attacking you as soon as you let her up!"

"Well, I guess I gotta do something with her until I can get in contact with some monks or something willing to take her home..." Ranma considered, before her eyes lit up, "Hey, I KNOW!"

With that, she picked up Shampoo's bound ankles, and dragged her to the lockers. Opening one of them, she stuffed Shampoo in one, hanging her upside down by her ankles on the clothes hook inside, and closed it. The three other girls and a little black piglet looked on in shock, as Ranma scrawled a messy note saying, "Wild animal, do not open", and taped it to the door, "There, she should be good until later... uh, anyone got a lock I can use, just in case people can't read the note?"

"I don't think many people will be able to read your writing," Sayuri commented with a hooded gaze.

"You can't do that!" Akane proclaimed, "That's inhumane!"

"Am I supposed to have sympathy for some undead, uncute chick who has followed me from beyond China and the grave to kill me?" Ranma enquired, unmoved by the raven haired girl's proclamation. "Come on, let's get home, I wanna get to supper before Pops gets dibs on my grub!"

As Ranma walked out the locker room, Akane hesitated, before turning to look at the locker that held the undead girl captive, and began to hear the faint sound of someone sniffling, "Is... is she crying?"

Approaching the locker, Akane listened, and confirmed the girl inside was near sobbing. Heartbroken, she opened the locker, and gently lowed the girl out of it, "There now, I won't leave you here like that brute Ranma would."

Ranma stepped back in to find out what was taking Akane so long, and spotted the scene, "Uh, Akane, what are you doing?"

"We can't just leave her like this, Ranma! It isn't right!" Akane insisted, earning a nod from P-Chan. More than likely P-chan supported freeing Shampoo for other motives; any enemy of Ranma's on the loose and blood lusting was someone Ryoga owed a drink to.

"And I guess the constant attempts to murder me are fine and dandy?" Ranma countered.

"Well, it's your fault anyways!"

"Mine! She started it!"

Akane got up in Ranma's face, "She wouldn't have if you had just left her food alone!"

"I was hungry!"

"Like that's any excuse," Akane retorted, "Besides, you said yourself she isn't any real challenge like she is, I would think Mr. Hotshot martial artist would be able to defend herself against a non-threat like her! Just look at her!" Akane pointed to the girl on the ground, being hugged by both Yuka and Sayuri.

"Aww, she's so cute!" both girls proclaimed, having their arms wrapped around the dead pouting girl; she was like some sort of anti-living plushy, what with her greenish peach fuzzed skin.

"Aw Jeez," Ranma grumbled, "Look, she's none of my concern, but if you feel that strongly about it, you look after her, alright!"

"It's not like she's some sort of pet, Ranma!" Akane retorted, bending down to help Shampoo up.