Passionate Envy

( you are so lucky )

& ; draco & hermione

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, its characters, settings, etc. These words, however, are mine.

He had needled her for years, calling her every name in the book, most often the most despicable and unforgivable. He had trailed around her best friends and tormented them endlessly for so long... Looking at him, she always thought she would feel nothing but hatred, the longing to lash out at him and inflict the pain and the damage he had on her and Harry and Ron.

But now, with him sitting in front of her, looking defeated and lost and without any reason to continue living, she wanted nothing more than to reach and comfort him.

She wanted to give him the love he'd missed out on in life, that he would most likely miss out on in the future if he kept up his pride-filled charade.


"You're lucky, you know that, Granger?" He cut her off listlessly, emotionlessly and when he raised his eyes to meet her own, she finally saw what had been the motivation behind every evil, desecrating thing he'd ever managed to do.


She refrained from speaking, feeling that he had more to say.

"Don't ever let anyone... Even if they're as pompous as me, make you believe any different." He shook his head and laughed humourlessly, a dark chill that sent shivers running up and down her body. "It's not the Muggle borns who should be ashamed. It's the rest of us; the purebloods, the ones like my family, anyway. The ones like me."

"No, Draco..." Hermione whispered, falling down to sit in front of him. She hesitated for only the slightest moment before she took his cold hands into her warm ones. "You have a lot to be ashamed of, but... You aren't responsible for your parents actions and... You should never have been forced to follow in their footsteps if you wanted something different..." She paused. "Did you? Did you want this? You can still change."

Draco stood, dodging her question and pulling his hands away from hers. "It doesn't matter anymore... There's nothing I can do now."

"That's not true!"

"Yes, it is." He snapped, reverting back to the cold boy -- man -- that he had always projected himself to be. "I can want what you have all I want, but I'm too far gone to have it anymore." His eyes softened. "I'm sorry."

She had the strangest feeling that he was referring to his past actions... But also the future choices he was sure he was going to make.

And as he walked away, she believed with every part of her that he could still change.

Evidently, he thought differently. And maybe is was because of that need to have the stability she had always had, that pushed him to think he would never be able to live happily. He'd never had it before. To him, it was unreachable.

A passionate envy.

And nothing more.

( AN. ) Just something that popped into my head earlier today and wouldn't leave me alone. :D

I hope someone out there enjoyed this!