A/N: You read my POTO parody, right? Well, here's the parody for Chicago!
Disclaimer: if anyone on this site actually OWNED any of the topics, do you THINK they'd call it FANFICTION?!
Velma: All that jazz! Whoot, sing it with me! Theme music yeah!
Police: Wait a minute; you killed your husband and your sister!
Velma: Shit, they found out. Ah well, I'll be more famous now.
Roxie: Fred, I love you.
Fred: You have a husband but damn, you're hot!
Roxie: Amos WHO?
1 month later
Roxie: You CHEATED on me?! SON OF A BITCH! shoots Fred
Amos: I'll cover for you, honey.
Roxie: Thanks, darling. Now, just tell them that YOU killed him while I sit and sing a song.
Amos: Fine, I killed him, officers. Roxie is an angel! She wouldn't do that!
Roxie: Thank god that man has a brain…
Amos: Wait a minute…Fred Casely? He sold us our furniture!
Roxie: SHUT UP!!
Police: Wait, who killed him here?
Roxie: I killed him, and I'd kill him again if I could!
Police: Once was enough, dearie.
Roxie: I DON'T WANNA GO TO JAIL! NO!!
Officer: Put her in Block 6.
Mama: We call it Murderess Row.
Roxie: Is that supposed to be nicer?
Velma: Lookie, Mama, an article about me!
Roxie: OMG THE Velma Kelly!
Velma: Yeah whatever.
Mama: Here you go.
Roxie: What's that…music?
Bandleader: And now, the six merry murderesses of the Cook County Jail in their rendition of…the Cell Block Tango!
Liz: I killed my husband cuz he wouldn't stop POPPIN' his gum!
Annie: My boyfriend had SIX wives!
June: My husband ran into my knife 10 times! SQUISH!
Hunyak: speaks Hungarian Not guilty!
Velma: My sister and husband were doing NUMBER 17: THE SPREAD EAGLE!
Mona: He saw himself as alive…and I saw him dead! LIPSCHITZ!
All: He had it coming!
Bandleader: Presenting, Mama Morton!
Mama: OK, so if you're good to me, I'm good to you. Got it?
Roxie: Velma, any advice to me? I'M YOUR #1 FAN!
Velma: Keep your paws OFF MY UNDERWEAR!!
Roxie: How do I get OUT of here?
Mama: You need Billy Flynn to back your trial.
Roxie: Billy Flynn?
Mama: And give me $100 for a phone call…
Billy: All I care about is…LOVE!
Roxie: Yeah, yeah, yeah, get me a trial date already!
Billy: Sheesh, okay! Let's make you…what's the word I'm looking for? Nice. Not guilty. Appealing in the courtroom.
Mary Sunshine: Maybe there IS a little bit of good in everyone…or maybe NOT!
Billy: OK, dummy. Mouth the words that I say. Can you do that? Baby talk
Reporters: Oh Roxie?
Roxie: Shh! I'm a dummy!
Billy: And they both reached for the gun…
Roxie: BUT I GOT IT FIRST!
Billy: Your part is silent, little toad!
Audience: POTO? Uhm, GirlInTheMirror121, did you copy/paste from your POTO parody by accident?
Roxie: I'm famous! YAY! They gonna recognize my eyes, my hair, my teeth, my boobs, my nose…
Me, Sam, and Aly: watching the movie at Aly's house WHAT BOOBS?!
Velma: Ugh, that bitch stole my trial, my freedom, my lawyer…
Roxie: Uhm yeah sorry, tough luck.
Velma: I can't do it alone, Roxie. Help!
Roxie: Hahaha that's so funny! No. And advice? Lay off the caramels.
Roxie and Velma: I'm my own best friend…
Roxie: Hmm…maybe if I SAY I'm pregnant, I can get out of here!
Kitty: GO TO HELL!
Roxie: pretends to fall Oh, I hope the fall didn't hurt the baby…
Mama, reporters, and Billy: BABY?
Velma: SHIT! (A/N: I love the look on her face at this part!)
And now we have a cliffhanger ending before act 2!
I know, not as good as POTO, but my best. I'll put up Act 2 on Friday. Tomorrow is Halloween, and that way I can get some reviews from my fans!
Hope you guys liked this one!