"MentallyHilarious Much?"

Summary: Uchiha Sasuke was sure he had fairly normal life. He went to school, had a cat, family and friends. But soon he found out, that nothing is as normal as he would like it to be. Because life never is that easy. Especially when you are in love with your own brother.

Warnings YAOI. Incest. Lemons. Sakura bashing. Plus there MAY be longer pauses before updating another chapter. So no complains later!

Genre: Romance/General/Angst/Humor

Pairings: Sasuke x Itachi; later Gaara x Naruto.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did, I wouldn't write it in here but in Shounen Jump XD


"Mentally Hilarious Much?"

I always had a trouble with describing who I really was. A boy? Yes… at least last time I checked. A teenager? Most certainly. But what kind of a male teenager? A geek? Not really, even though I always had good grades. Maybe a sports type? Also not really, even though I practice some of the traditional Japanese sports. Then maybe something more drastic? A punk, heavy metal or emo? I certainly like to dress in dark colors, don't like too much company and aren't a prince charming here. But to listen heavy metal music all the time, take drugs or cut myself? No, that's not me as well for sure.

So who? Who am I then? This question was always nudging me since I started high school two years ago. And the answer never came…until 3 months ago. All of sudden I knew, I just knew, and everything was all right with the world again. Or maybe not really. Why you ask? Since the answer to my question was this: I was a boy who was in love with his older brother.

Mind you, I didn't accept that answer just like that and moved on with my life. Actually I experienced quite the mental shock, the biggest in my life in fact. I still feel the effects of it, and I think I always will. Because, in the end, how many people out there can say that they have a thing for their sibling, of the same gender no less?

But forgetting the mental damage this realization cast upon me, somewhere deep down there I just felt that it was true, that this answer to my question is just right. And I knew that I always felt it somehow, I just never admitted it before to myself.





"What?!" I turn my head violently leaving my daydream land and look right into blue eyes of my best friend. Uzumaki Naruto. The loudest, most outrageous and hyper boy in the entire school. One may wonder what dark, silent and calm person like me might be doing with someone like him. Calling him my best friend no less. In fact, I still wonder about that. I've known him for so long, almost my entire life, but most of the time we were rivals. Actually we still are, but not only. I guess about time we entered high school together we realized that we are more than that.

"What were you thinking about? Geez, man, I've been calling you for, like, 10 minutes!" He says, or rather screams, bouncing happily in his sit beside me. I narrow my eyes slightly. I can't tell him I was mentally undressing my brother, now can I?

"Nothing that concerns you, dobe. And stop saying 'like' in the middle of every sentence, it's really annoying." I don't know where did he pick that up, but I swear, one of those days I'm gonna snap and cut this word out of his brain. Literally.

"Grumpy much, teme? You think everything is, like, annoying!" Naruto screams again, waving his hands around. I scream, in my head however, dangerously squeezing a pen in my hand and thinking where should I aim it on Naruto's head to make him stop saying that word.

"Naruto, if I were you I would really shut up, even an idiot like you should see that Sasuke is really tensed lately. I'm not going to collect your limbs from the floor when he's done with you." Gaara, my second best friend said, in his usual deadly calm voice. He was sitting right before me reading a book about necromancy or something. Weird? Maybe. Did I give a shit? Not really.

Friendship between me and Gaara formed around the same time as the one between me and Naruto. We didn't like each other in the beginning, he was the only one that, beside Naruto earlier, had enough guts and courage to oppose me, and vice versa. We cursed each other, fought each other and almost kill each other. But it worked out fine, when we found out that we had more in common than we imagined. Since that time Naruto, Gaara and me are inseparable and almost whole school is afraid of us. Except fangirls. Those weird, weird creatures that are not afraid of anything and are willing to do absolutely everything to get a strand of your hair or sample of your DNA. Scary if you ask me…

"Actually, Sasuke, there's been something I wanted to ask you…" Gaara's voice makes me stop thinking about good, old times (minus fangirls cause that's still in present and isn't good at all) when everything was pretty normal and life seemed to be a less of a bitch then it is now.

"Hn?" I grunt, looking at him and resting my chin on a hand. Gaara slowly closes his book and brings his head up to look me in the eyes. Damn, he has this look on his face. That look that says: 'Now I'm going to politely ask you a question and you better replay or I'll bite your head off'. And I had a strange idea what that question was going to be about.

"I've noticed that for the past few months you've been acting…different."

"Yeah!" Naruto cuts immediately in catching up on a topic. "I mean, you're always grumpy, pessimistic, don't speak much and glare at everyone… but lately you just seem like you are…how do I put it….a little bit out there." He states finally, pride being visible on his face for finding such a brilliant description.

I rose my eyebrow slightly. Out there? Oh, I'm definitely 'Out there' mentally screwing my older brother… Off the topic! Anyway… No, I didn't tell them about my latest revelations. Why? Because I still have my last bits of sanity, that's why. I shrug my shoulders.

"I don't know what you mean. Everything's fine, really, nothing unusual or extraordinary is going on." Straight forward lie. Nothing extraordinary my ass. But the moment I say this, I can see that it's not gonna work. At least not with Gaara, since Naruto found himself already distracted with paper fight that took place in the class.

The redhead rose and eyebrow and opened his mouth to say something, but fortunately was disturb by our homeroom teacher Hatake Kakashi entering the class after being late…20 minutes.

"Sorry kids that I'm late but I got lost…" He starts to say, but is disturbed by his students.

"On the road of life, yes we know" The rest of the class ends the sentence for him, like they do every time he is late…which is every time we have classes with him.

I sigh in relief. Saved by the porno freak. But as I look at Gaara and send him an apologetic look, I can see clearly in his eyes that he isn't finished yet.


A/N: Ok, so that's pretty much it…for the first chapter of course XD In the next one I'll introduce Itachi and the current relationship he's having with his brother. Stay put!