Welcome to the fourth edition of Guess the Author. I am your humble host, Jason "Zaratan" Jones, and I come to you 11 tales from a wide variety of authors to dazzle your senses.

Yvj won last time, oh so long ago, so this intriguing topic, soap opera, is all his doing. On the other hand, it looks like a LOT of people had a lot of fun with this one.

The rules are simple. Read through all the stories, and then try to guess which of our amazing authors wrote that particular story. Write out your responses to me, Zaratan, by either PM or by email at zaratan4 at hotmail dot com, and the one closest, getting the most correct, wins and gets to select our next contest topic.

And now, for our list of authors, in alphabetical order;




Gray Cardinal

Joe Stoppinghem




Scoutcraft Piratess



Remember, match as many stories as you can with these authors, happy reading, and good luck to you all!

…x x x x…

Middleton Hospital

Previously, on Middleton Hospital…

…x x x x…

"You were reckless Dr. Possible." Michael Adams glared back at the younger woman in front of him. "You can be sure the medical ethics committee will hear about this. You're suspended till further notice."

…x x x x…

Vivian held tight to James, looking deep into his eyes. "I love you. Please, run away with me, I need you."

…x x x x…

Shego stroked a gentle hand down Kim's face. "You're going to have to tell him at some point, you can't keep denying yourself anymore."

Kim held herself tightly, pulling away from the green-skinned villainess. "But I love him so much, and I don't love you. Oh why did I have to fall in love with a man, yet be attracted to women."

Dr. Anne Possible frowned where she was standing, hidden by the closed doorway. "So… Shego thinks she can get between my daughter and the love of her life? We'll just see about that."

…x x x x…

Ron glanced around worriedly as he stood in Kim's room. He saw Kim standing by the bed, her eyes downcast, yet his eyes kept looking around. "Okay, did you hear that, cause that was just…"

"Ron, we need to talk."

Ron froze in his search. "Umm… KP, is this anything to do with what that announcer guy brought up?"

Kim held herself tightly, unable to meet his eyes. "Ron, you know how much I love you, don't you?"

"Of course KP. I love you too."

Kim turned slightly away, her head lowered in shame. "Ron, you might not love me so much if you knew what I had to tell you. I've been keeping something from you… something so devastating… and I would deserve it if you never wanted to speak to me again. But I don't want to lose you."

Ron stepped forward to take her in his arms, concerned about the way Kim was acting. "KP…" Ron stopped as he heard music in the background. "Okay, where is that coming from?"

A single tear trickled down Kim's cheek as she turned her head to look up at the ceiling. "Ron…" Kim paused, letting the moment hang in the air.

After ten seconds, Ron moved his head beside Kim's, following her gaze. "Uhh… KP… what are we looking at?"

…x x x x…

Shego stalked back into the lair furious. She had professed her love, but Kim couldn't let go of that sidekick of hers, even though she wasn't attracted to him at all. It was maddening, it was frustrating, it was… Drakken tied up.

"I love my daughter very much."

Shego's hands flared to life, her eyes questing to find the source of the voice. "Show yourself."

Anne Possible stepped out from the shadows, her expression calm, even in the face of the villainess's powers. "I love my daughter so much, I'm willing to throw away my career to make her happy."

Shego just smirked, seeing the doctor just standing there. "I make her happy, in ways that boyfriend of hers never could."

Anne didn't react to the jibe, as she walked forward slowly, hands behind her back. "No Shego, you don't. Kim finds you attractive, yes, but you don't make her happy. Ron does that."

Now Shego was smiling broadly. "Too bad she doesn't find him attractive. I guess I'll win by default."

"No Shego… you won't." Anne pulled the gun from behind her back, and before Shego could do more than gasp, Anne Possible fired.

…x x x x…

"Ron... I'm gay."

Ron just blinked, pondering that. "Okay, I'm feeling a bit confused myself..."

Kim whirled, gripping tightly to Ron's arms. "No Ron, I mean... I'm attracted to women."

Ron's face fell at the revelation. "Oh."

Kim brought her hand up to Ron's face, gently stroking his cheek. "This doesn't have to change anything. I love you. I still plan to marry you tomorrow, no matter what."

Ron blinked, his head shooting up quickly. "Wait... what? Wedding? When did we..."

Kim reacted as if she hadn't heard him. "Ron, you are the other half of my soul, the only person I could ever love. I don't ever want to be with anyone but you for the rest of my life."

Ron was looking around the room now, thoroughly confused. "Okay, I know there have to be cameras or something around here. Man, this is some prank, I can tell you."

"Ron, I will be the best wife I can be for you, I promise you. I just... I had to tell you how I really felt. I just... oh how I wish my soulmate wasn't of the opposite gender I prefer."

Ron was looking to Kim curiously, shaken. "Are you serious here KP? I mean, this strange music and the announcer guy before..."

Kim turned away, clutching herself tightly, trying hard to keep Ron from seeing the tears she was shedding. "Maybe... maybe you should go for now. Please... think about what I said. I do love you Ron, oh so much. I don't know what I would do if you weren't in my life. Please..."

Ron blinked, hesitantly reaching out for Kim before pulling back. "Umm... sure KP. I'll... think about what you said and talk to you later."

Ron left the room after one last look at Kim, shaking his head. "Man, this is some prank. Wedding? KP into women? This must be some really weird dream. Maybe I should stop eating those habaneros before bed, cause this has got to be the freakiest..." Ron froze on the staircase as the music in the background became darker and more sinister. "Okay, I've seen more than enough television to know that that isn't a good thing."

Anne Possible stepped out from the shadows, her expression dark and troubled. "Ronald... I need to speak with you."

Ron glanced around for a moment before taking a few hesitant steps down the stairs. "Sure thing Mrs. Dr. P. This has just been such a strange dream."

"So Kimmie told you then, did she?"

Ron nodded slowly, trying to find the source of the strange music. "Yeah, but..."

"Then you'll understand why I need to do this Ron." Anne's arm shot out, and before Ron could react, she plunged the needle into his arm.

Ron pulled back, but he could already see that the needle was empty. A moment later, his vision started to blur. "Oh Fuji. Can you even get knocked out in a dream."

As Ron fell to the floor, Anne Possible stood over him, a faint smile on her face. Before the darkness claimed him, he could hear her final comments. "Don't worry Ron, I'll make sure that you and Kimmie will be happy... no matter what it takes.

…x x x x…

James pulled away from Vivian, turning his back to her. "I'm sorry Vivian, I care about you as well, but my family... I can't leave my family. Not now. Do you understand?"

Vivian reached out, laying her hand on his arm. "But when James, when? I love you, you love me, isn't that enough?"

James shook his head, lifting his gaze skyward. "Vivian, you know how much I love Anne, even after everything she has done lately. And there is the boys as well, they need me."

"Then we'll bring them with us." Vivian took his hands in hers, looking up at him pleadingly. "You haven't been happy for some time now, and Anne hasn't treated you properly for so long. That's why I came to you, told you how I felt about you, started all of this. We need each other James. Kim has her own life now, with a man she loves. Can't I have that too, can't I have the man I love?"

James pulled her close, hugging her tightly, as the two of them stared off into the distance.

…x x x x…

Kim stood at the front of the chapel, her white dress gleaming. Her face though held another expression, one of great concern and sorrow. She wasn't sure why her mother insisted that she walk down the aisle as Ron was not there, but she had told her not to worry, that everything was taken care of and there was only a small change in the schedule.

Kim exchanged a worried look with her parents. "Mom, what is going on? Where's Ron?"

James seemed equally confused, but Anne just smiled serenely. "Don't worry dear, everything will work out just the way you want it. I want you to be happy my darling daughter, no matter what that takes."

Kim frowned slightly at the use of her mother's wording, but her head shot up quickly when she heard the wedding march begin again.

Through the doors, also bedecked in a long, flowing white wedding gown, strode Shego, arm in arm with Ron's father, who just kept shaking his head in confusion. Kim's analytical mind took in the sight quickly, the uneven balance, the almost embarrassed glances around, and knew something more than face value was up.

Kim strode forward a couple of steps, glaring. "Shego, what are you doing here? I thought I told you…"

"KP…" Kim blinked at the tone at which she had been addressed, tentative, but with deep meaning, something she had never heard from Shego before. "…I'm not Shego. I mean, I look like Shego, cause like your Mom switched my brain with hers or something, and how does something like that even work cause I really don't think I should be on my feet one night after brain surgery… and how the heck does my hair look untouched after getting the top of my head off? I mean, this is one seriously messed up dream that I can't seem to wake up from."

Kim blinked and moved quickly to the green-skinned woman's side, her jaw hanging. "Ron… is that really you in there?"

"Sure is KP, and man, you don't want to know what I went through to get this girdle on. Which reminds me, how'd your mom know to have another dress ready if she only switched us yesterday? I mean, none of this is making much sense."

Kim didn't seem to hear Ron's protests as her hand stroked Ron's new cheek, a smile spreading cross her face. "This is everything I could have dreamed for." Kim lunged forward quickly, her lips meetings Ron's in an impassioned kiss, one that cut Ron's protests right off.

When Kim pulled away, Ron had a glassy look in his eyes. "Now this is the part of the dream I've been looking forward to."

Still dazed, Kim pulled Ron to the front of the pew, even as the stunned crowd murmured to themselves, all except Anne Possible, whose smile just got brighter and brighter.

When things had settled down, the priest began the ceremony. "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join this man… umm… woman, and this woman, in holy matrimony. Whosesoever…"

Ron seemed to snap out of it as the priest began, finally getting a full, look around. "Man, this is some crazy dream. I mean, I pictured our wedding, but I never thought it would be like this."

"…these two spirits, joined for all eternity in…"

"I mean… KP, you look as beautiful as I always thought you would. I'm kinda looking a bit different then I figured though."

"…love knows no bounds, not true love in the…"

"Of course, the fact that no one seems to be a bit weirded out that Mrs. P. kinda did illegal brain surgery, kidnapped me and Shego, or seems to hear me complaining right now…" Ron trailed off as Kim just smiled brightly at him, the joy on her face evident. "Oh hell, who cares. I'm marrying Kim. It's all good." Ron returned his attention to the priest.

"If anyone has cause why these two should not be wed, speak now, or forever hold your peace."

Ron groaned as the background music changed, and he didn't even bother turning around. "Oh man, what now?"

"I object!"

Everyone turned quickly to the doors, all except Ron. He did hear the gasp, and the silent exclamation from Kim. "Ron?"

Ron groaned again, shaking his head. "I watch more than enough TV to know what I'm going to see when I turn around." He lifted his head just enough for a glance and sighed. "Yup, there's my body. Can't my brain come up with something original, even in my own dreams?"

Anne Possible was on her feet, set to confront the woman turned man who stood ready to fight at the now open doorway. "Shego, I took care of you. How'd you get away, you should be dead?"

Shego smirked an evil smirk, which looked quite strange on Ron's face. "Oh, I almost didn't Doc. Thankfully, I had a little bit of help."

The crowd gasped again as Shego's savior stepped forward, and this time Anne Possible stepped back in shock and fear. "No, it's not possible…"

Anne Possible stepped into the church, anger evident in her features. "Anything's possible for a possible… Andrea."

The crowd gasped again, a routine that was becoming all too familiar to Ron. "Oh man, what is the plot on this, clone, alien duplicate, or evil twin?"

Anne Possible stepped forward, walking down the aisle to confront her doppelganger. "So my dear sister, you thought you could kill me and steal my life?"

Ron nodded quickly. "Yup, evil twin. Man, my brain needs to get some new material here."

Andrea snarled in response. "Your life? This would be my life if you hadn't stolen James from me in the first place. He was mine… MINE!"

Ron's eyes shot up as the music in the background picked up again. "Umm… I know this is a dream and everything, but let's try to calm things down a bit here. Let's not do anything drastic here."

Andrea pulled a gun from her purse, swinging it wildly around the room. "This is my life. MY LIFE! And no one is going to take it away from me."

And with a wild yell, Andrea started pulling the trigger.

…x x x x…

Ron shot up in the bed with a scream, his breathing heavy. Closing his eyes, he brought his hand up to his forehead, pressing against it. "Man, what a dream. That's the last time I eat anything spicy before bed."

Ron's eyes suddenly shot open when a soft hand slid across his stomach underneath the blanket. "Told you so."

Ron glanced to the left quickly, and was stunned to see Kim laying beside him, her head poking out from the covers, her bare shoulders barely visible. "KP, what are you doing?"

Kim gave a faint smirk, even as she refused to open her eyes. "I'm getting comfortable, what does it look like."

Ron was very stunned. "But… KP… what about…" Ron shuddered a bit as Kim's hand stroked his skin, climbing up a bit as her head nestled closer, tucking her head against his shoulder. Kim's arm finally settled down, wrapping tightly across his chest just below his breasts, and… Ron froze as the realization of just what he felt there when Kim had held him tighter kicked in. His eyes even wider, he slowly lifted the blanket away to catch a full view of his soft, pale green breasts.

Kim practically purred as she lay her head at the top of Ron's breasts. "Hmm… Andrea may have been evil, but she did make us very happy, didn't she Ron?"