It was ridiculous how much she had grown to hate Lily Evans.

Of course, she could take some comfort in the idea that she was not alone in this - nurturing an amazingly huge infatuation for James Potter (or Sirius Black or Remus Lupin or even the occasional Peter Pettigrew, as it happened) and growing to hate Lily Evans almost as deeply as they loved their marauder's in the first place for the attention she got from them. It seemed she shared at least this one connection with every other female at Hogwarts (including the teachers, she couldn't help but think sometimes).

But she liked to think her feelings for Lily Evans went beyond (far, far beyond) irrational jealousy and even more irrational hatred. There was a hell of a lot of disgust mixed in there, too.

It was disgusting, for instance, how hopelessly James fawned over Lily - and how oblivious he was to everyone else. It was disgusting how horribly she treated him; manipulating his feelings and his head and his heart to her advantage, knowing that she had him around her pinky finger and using it so shamelessly. But most disgusting of all was that she was forcing James to change himself just to please her, when everyone else knew he was perfect precisely the way he was.

And really, this is where her hatred, her disgust, her loathing of Lily Evans (soon to be Potter, there's no doubt in her mind) stems from. She was - she is - breaking James Potter. She is changing James Potter. She is slowly, slowly, slowly killing the original James Potter.

Lily thought she was popular. But really? She wasn't.


AN--- Right. So. I figured I'd better save my rambling 'til the end on this one, if only to avoid turning you all off it before you even read it. I know, I know - the reception on this one isn't going to be good. Because the Hogwarts girls might not like Lily, but all of you readers out there do!

But anyway, let me at least try to justify myself. I was sitting, thinking about the Marauder's era, but the people who were rather overlooked during that time (...for all my moaning and groaning, I have wayyy too much time on my hands...) and thinking about how Jo says that EVERYONE loved the Marauders. Now, this wasn't totally unreasonable. There's a group of guys at .my. school like that! And, as usual, there's .one. girl that one of the guys has got his eye on, and he .just won't give up. And like at Hogwarts, this girl is popular, pretty, smart, - perfect. However, she's talked about relentlessly behind her back. She's given the illusion of popularity, but nobody actually liked her... So why not Lily?

Feel free to make this from the POV of whoever you like. An OC, Emmeline, Alice, whoever.

I don't own anything you recognize.

Review! Or else the Cannon Gods will frown upon your favorite Marauder pairing!

And so; the end of yet another horrifically long AN from me. )

---Cayenne