Chapter Song- The Boy's Gone by Jason Mraz
Disclaimer-Yeah, unfortunately I don't own any of the Twilight plot line or characters Stephenie Meyer does...shoot.
A/N: So I finally got my act together and I'm fixing all the issues in chapters 1-6, I have #7 written and it will be up very soon, I promise!!
I ran to leave it all behind, my life, my love, my memories.
I ran to forget, to forget her, to forget my loss, to forget myself.
The forest never seemed to end. I must've been running for hours but the scenery never changed. Trees, rocks, grass and dirt. Trees, rocks, grass and dirt. Trees, rocks, grass...
This was to be my home, I could never go back. I could never return, not knowing what she had chosen. Not knowing that she would soon die, that she would never again be the same.
Her sent would burn my nose, she would be cold, lifeless. Her very existence would go against nature, she would never be the same.
Bella, my Bella would be one of them. A bloodsucker. A vampire.
I came to a clearing, there was a stream, and for the first time in who knows how long I stopped running.
Instead I trotted over to the stream and took a long, very much needed drink.
I looked at myself, my reflection. Water dripped off my fur, distorting the image.
What a sorry creature I was, running from my problems. But, what else could I do? There was no way to fix this. I couldn't change her mind, I'd tried my hardest, but still she had chosen him.
I growled at the thought of him. Of what he was, what he had done, and what he had, who he had.
Pain. I'd never felt pain like this. It was unbearable, the pain. Losing her, to him, that was unbearable.
I couldn't stand it, how weak I was, how this was effecting me, how it was making me feel. I should have been stronger than this. If it had been anyone but her...
I took off again.
I couldn't stop, I had to keep going, had to get away, but fatigue was setting in. Not physically. Physically I was sure that I could keep going forever, but my mind was tired. So many thoughts, whirling around, chasing each other in never ending circles. All about her, about her choice...
It started to rain, and I didn't care. I didn't care that I was soaked through to the bone, or that the wind was blowing, howling. I couldn't care about anything but her.
The image of her face invaded my mind, so that I couldn't see anything but her.
She'd chosen him over me, him, her bloodsucker lover. She left me standing alone, not knowing what to do with myself. Depressed.
And yet I couldn't be angry at her. Not Bella, never Bella. I was angry at myself, for not trying harder, for not doing more. I was angry at him. For stealing her away from me, for being the one she'd chosen. I was angry at him for existing.
I came upon a farm and for the first time I wondered where I was.
I hadn't been paying attention to my direction, I hadn't been paying attention to anything for a long time.
It felt like it had been years since I'd last seen her. Felt her, held her, kissed her...
I winced at the memory, it was so clear, she'd asked for it, of her own will...
I stiffened suddenly, I'd heard a sound. A loud noise, a gun shot.
I'd been spotted.
I crept slowly, silently to hide behind a large boulder, there were voices now, wondering where the 'bear' had gone.
Soon they left, satisfied that they'd scared the monster away and I was alone again.
I laid down then, wallowing in self-pity.
Sun streamed through between the leaves, birds chirped, squirrels scampered through the fallen leaves. But none of those things woke me.
No, another sound, a voice. A soft voice that chimed like a bell shook me from my nightmares.
And then I saw her. Long, silky black hair, brilliant, sparkling green eyes...