Author's Note: Yes, this is another fanfic set inspired by the 30 Kisses prompts at livejournal's 30kisses community. I knew they are a dime a dozen, but I have been so obsessed with this pairing that I've had the need to write daily about them.
30 First Kisses
Thirty different ways Matt and Mohinder might share their first kiss
By Jennifer Rubio (nee Wand)
"Look over here" (kocchi muite)
Setting: After 2x04, "The Kindness of Strangers." Molly has just fallen into her coma.
"What are you doing?"
It was an accusation, not just a question, when Matt asked it; but the figure in the chair didn't move or turn to face him.
"I'm resting," the scientist responded in a tone drained of all inflection.
"Well. Don't let me disturb you. I'm just going to go over here and work on how we're going to rescue our kid." Matt was pissy. But Mohinder wasn't biting.
After a few seconds of stony silence, Matt said, "You know, I can't believe you. How can you be resting? I've been on my feet all day trying to get everything we need to go to Philadelphia and find this guy, and I get home and you're resting?"
"Matt, I don't want to discuss this." Mohinder stood up abruptly, as though he was about to walk out of the room. "I am really tired of you ordering me around like I'm some sort of foot soldier. I'm just as worried about Molly as you are." He still wouldn't face him.
"Damn it, look over here when I'm talking to you!" Matt lunged forward grabbed his shoulders roughly, spinning him around.
"Get your hands off--" Mohinder started, but the words trailed into silence as he found himself a scant few inches from angry dark eyes and a furrowed brow.
He felt his strength drain away. "I'm sorry," he said. "I'm just so tired..."
"We both are," Matt said, drawing him into a brief, friendly hug. "We just have to remember what we're fighting for, that's all."
Mohinder sighed, looking down at the odd diamond formed by the lines of their feet.
"What are you fighting for?" he said softly.
"What do you mean?" Matt said defensively. "I'm doing this for Molly. I've always been doing this for Molly."
"Maybe that's not enough for me anymore."
"What?" This was unforgivable; it was worse; it was treason. Was he saying he'd given up?
"Maybe this is about more than just Molly. This is about you and your father. I wish you'd just admit it."
"How I feel about my father has nothing to do with this."
"But it does!" Mohinder hissed, leaning in to him. "And denying it does you no good whatsoever. You're not objective in this, Matt, and neither am I. But at least I'm big enough to admit it."
"What are you talking about?" sputtered Matt. "As though you're not doing this for Molly."
"I'm not doing it just for her," Mohinder said. "I'm doing it for you, as well."
"Well, I don't need your help."
"I'm not doing it because you need it. I'm doing it because I want to."
"Thanks, but no thanks," Matt grumbled, turning away.
Mohinder laid a hand on his shoulder. "Look over here when I'm talking to you." He was echoing Matt's remark, but when Mohinder said it, it was something quiet. A request, not a demand.
Matt turned but did not meet his eyes.
"You're Molly's family, and that makes you my family too," Mohinder said gently. "Of course I want to help you. The question is, do you want to help yourself? Or do you want to continue to just spin your wheels and be angry? Sooner or later you're going to have to face the fact that you'll be facing him."
Sighing, Matt nodded. "I know. I just don't see how you're going to help me with that."
The thick, dark eyelashes fluttered, and Mohinder gazed at him. A dark hand came to rest on Matt's shoulder, then his cheek. "I don't know, either. But I'm hoping that knowing you have a family here will help you deal with the loneliness. We care about you. ...I care about you. Probably... more than you even know." When Matt's expression changed to one of surprise, Mohinder feared he'd said too much, and he quickly turned, his hand sliding from the other man's face.
Then his wrist was caught in a firm grip. "Look over here," Matt murmured, pulling Mohinder toward him and crushing him in an embrace. His lips touched Mohinder's forehead. It was just a natural expression of thanks and comfort and kinship. And then he exhaled, and Mohinder's face was tilting up toward him, and they were breathing into each other... and Matt found his lips on his eyelids, his cheek... Even when their lips touched and held, it felt perfectly natural. It wasn't until afterwards, when they stared at each other, contemplating the step they'd just taken, that it seemed at all like they'd done something odd.
"I just kissed you," Matt said.
"Astute observation," Mohinder half-smiled.
"Was... is that OK?" It wasn't the question he expected to ask.
"Do you think it is?" Mohinder wasn't sure who this quietly smooth person was that had taken over his body and was replying so quickly. He certainly hadn't begun to process all of this.
"I think... I don't know if it is... but I need it to be right now," Matt confessed. "I need you... to be my family until all this is over."
To Mohinder's amazement, the tough-guy cop who'd been yelling a few moments ago began to crumple, a flush creeping through his face until tears sparkled in his eyes. "I don't know if I'm going to have a family after this. I've already lost the only family I'd ever had... and to think that I could find my dad again but that he's Molly's nightmare... and now we don't know if we're going to lose her..."
"Don't talk like that." Mohinder pulled him into an embrace. "We're not going to lose her."
"I just... I can't do this alone. I can't lose you, too." Matt wasn't daring to hold him; his arms were still at his sides. "Please tell me that wasn't a huge mistake."
"Far from it." A soft laugh glowed just behind Mohinder's words as he felt soft tears staining his shoulder. "What you just did, I've wanted you to do for ages. So please don't worry about that." He felt Matt nod. "You're a brave man, Matthew Parkman. And a good one. Probably the best one I've ever met. If there is any justice in the world, it has to favor you." Now it was Mohinder's turn to kiss Matt's forehead gently.
"Come on," he said. "Let's go save our little girl. And then there will be plenty of time to talk about you and me."