SpongeBob's eyes flung open. He reached over to turn off his alarm, grinning ear to ear.
"Oh, boy!" he happily exclaimed. "Gary, do you know what day it is?"
"Meow?" said Gary inquisitively.
"It's the anniversary of the day Squidward and I became neighbors! And you know what that means?"
"Bahahahahaha!" he laughed. "No, I'm all out of cucumbers….. No, today Squidward and I are going to have a special fun day!" He giggled sheepishly. "But he doesn't know it yet! It's a surprise!"
SpongeBob stood up in his bed. "No time to get ready today, I'm too eager to get started!" With that, SpongeBob jumped from his bed through his window. He fell onto the ground outside, along with the window's shattered glass.
In Squidward's house, Squidward was in bed sleeping. SpongeBob approached, stifling his giggles.
"SURPRISE!" he screamed.
Squidward jolted awake. "Huh?!" He turned to see the little sea sponge. "SPONGEBOB! What in Neptune's great ocean are you doing in my bedroom?!"
"Just making sure you don't sleep in and miss out on…." He smiled widely, "OUR SPECIAL FUN DAY!"
Squidward glanced at the clock. "It's 3:03 in the morning!" he shouted angrily.
"Yeah, sorry I'm three minutes late…...you know Gary, that chatty Cathy—"
Squidward pointed an accusing tentacle at SpongeBob. "And why aren't you wearing pants?!"
"I didn't have time to get dressed— I was too excited to get over here and start our special day!"
He threw his arms up in frustration. "Why would I want to spend my day off with you?!"
"Don't you know what day it is, Squidward? It's the anniversary of the day you and I became neighbors!" SpongeBob jumped onto the bed. "We're gonna have so much fun!"
Squidward, unnerved by SpongeBob's presence in his bed, backed up and sat on his pillow. "Get OFF my bed, SpongeB—"
"I'm going to call today…. SpongeBob and Squidward Friendship Day! SASFD for short, respectively."
"You and I are NOT friends…." said Squidward. "…...we're neighbors…... Our relationship is purely geographical!"
"Oh, silly Squidward!" he said with a little wave.
"I am serious, SpongeBob!"
SpongeBob reached into his underwear. "The first thing we should do on our special day is have breakfast together." He pulled out a plate of buttered waffles and smiled a dopey grin.
Squidward's eye twitched. "You have three seconds to get out of my house," he said, gritting his teeth with anger. "One...…..two…..."
"Hold on," said an oblivious SpongeBob, digging further into his underpants. "I have some syrup in here somewhere…..."
"…THREE." Squidward stood up on the bed, his body shaking with rage. "That is IT, SpongeBob! I am going to do something to you I should have done a long time ago!"
Before the sea sponge could finish his sentence, his face was covered with a black liquid. He opened his eyes and blinked. He held out his arms, dripping with the fluid, and looked up to Squidward. His lip quivered and his eyes welled with tears. "You….. you…... pooped on me?!" SpongeBob hopped off the bed and began to run wildly around the room, sobbing and screaming. "Gross! Gross! Gross! Eew! Eew! Eew!"
"That's not poop you idiot!" shouted Squidward. "It's ink!"
SpongeBob slid to a stop. "Ink??"
"Yes, ink," said Squidward. "You and your pants-less self made me do it!"
SpongeBob brought his finger to his chin. "Hmmm…." Then he clenched his muscles as hard as he could, gritted his teeth, and balled his hands into fists. His body trembled and a squeak was heard.
"What are you doing?!" asked an increasingly infuriated Squidward.
"Trying to make ink too!" replied the sponge cheerfully. "But it's not working…. maybe if I clench even harder…."
"No, stop!" Squidward grabbed him but then quickly dropped him again. "You can't make ink. Only people like me can, NOT SPONGES."
"That's just the way nature is." He crossed his arms. "It's our special defense."
"What about sponges? What are our special… something?"
"How should I know?! I mean……. why don't you try to go figure it out? Away from here?"
"But what about SASFD?"
"The what? Oh, I mean…. finding out could be your gift to me. Yeah." Squidward tried to push SpongeBob toward the door but he didn't move.
SpongeBob saluted. "Okay, Squidward! I will do just that!" He reached back into his pants and pulled out the same waffles from before. "Right after we enjoy these! I knew you wouldn't forget," he said with a wink.
"Oh, uh, say…." began Squidward. "You know the BEST way to enjoy waffles?"
"Noooo…... get up on the window sill and I'll show you."
"Okee dokee, Squidward!" He leapt up onto the open, circular sill, waffles in hand. "Hey this feels really familiar!"
"I'm sure it does." Squidward reached for the hinged windowpane and slammed it shut.
SpongeBob was pushed from the ledge and slammed into the ground. He sat up, pealed the buttery waffles from his face, and unlodged the fork from his body.
"Squidward is right!" he said triumphantly. "I should find my special something! Shouldn't be too hard, lots of people have called me 'special'." He struck a pose. "Yeeeah!"
And with that, his search began…...
To be continued...
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