Short A/N: I haven't watched Teen Titans in some time. Last night, I saw "Spellbound", and decided that I loved it. This came out darker than I had originally designed, but I'm pleased with it.
Warnings: M for sexuality and angst.
It was a little out of shame, and a little out of disgust, but she keeps flipping through the pages, one after another, again and again—she has to find it, she needs to find it, she needs it.
Strokes and touches, she caresses each sheet, the feel and smell of ink, sweat, tears, and pages and pages of lies; she can almost feel his hands controlling it all, his sweet words and ancient secrets bringing her further and further.
She's almost there, she knows it—she can hear him whisper sweet nothings and tales of power (over spells, over curses, over her) and she's so close, so very close--flips the pages faster, needing it wanting it so close to it he's in her surrounding her blinding her choking her killing her and
Screaming into her sheets, she climaxes.
From the book before her, a torn page lingers. A pair of eyes gazes, knowing, beautiful, unattainable, almost lustful.
Shaking, she stares back. She could die as she realizes the page remains flat, and he remains inside.
She's alone, all alone, with only his eyes to watch her as she aches for him, body and soul, full of wishes. Her own touches can't forget him, can't replace him.
He watches her as she weeps, and if Raven would only look, he laughs.
After all this time, she still wants him. After all this time, she still hates herself—for believing it, for wanting more. After all this time, she still gets sick to her stomach to think that she does this to herself for him.
After all this time, she still loves him.
After all this time, he still breaks her heart.
(He rapes her, time and again, and yet he is not here at all.)