3 THINGS THE NARUTO CHARACTERS WILL NEVER SAY
Number 1: Naruto
Ramen caused the death of the 3rd Hokage!
Sasuke, I want to smex you!
I love Shakespeare.
Number 2: Sasuke
I feel pretty! Oh so pretty! Pretty and witty and gay!
My farts smell like cheese.
You couldn't pay me to kill my brother, Itachi, who killed my whole clan.
Number 3: Sakura
OMG, Sasuke, you were just pwned by a noob!
Naruto, yo momma is so fat, when she jumped out of a plane, they all sang 'a whole new world!'
Have you guys read that awesome fan fiction? With Sasuke? And Kakashi? Together?
Number 4: Hinata
My hump, my hump, my lovely lady lumps! In the back and in the front!
Naruto, you're bor-ing!
Number 5: Kiba
Did you know that people eat dogs in Mongolia? We live awful close to Mongolia…
Shino, I dared Akamaru to eat one of your bugs and he died. I'm suing you.Look, I'm R2-D2! Beep beep bop boop beep beep!
Number 6: Shino
THERE'S ANTS IN MY PANTS!
Llamas are cooler than bugs.
Kiba, every time Akamaru barks, God kills a bug.
Number 7: Shikamaru
…How do you spell dog?
Please, call me Shika.
Let's go do some hard work!
Number 8: Ino
So not the drama.
Sasuke, you dress funny.
If I could have one wish, you know what it'd be? I'd wish I had a forehead like Sakura's.
Number 9: Chouji
Shikamaru, you're fat.
I'm tired of eating. Let's all fast for three days straight!
I hope hawks kill every butterfly in the world!
Number 10: Neji
Lord Hiashi, when I grow up, I'm gonna be just like you!
Okay, let's get this straight. I do want to screw Rock Lee. Just nobody's asked yet.
Tenten, can I cut those little balls off your head? They remind me of something I'd rather not think about…
Number 11: Rock Lee
Yo, the R-dizzle is in da howse. Wat up, foo?
You expect me to fight that guy? Just to 'protect and maintain my ninja way?' Yeah. Right.
Mrs. Frizzle and the Magic School Bus is my life.
Number 12: Tenten
I have a little sister named Eleveneleven.
I hate violence. Can't we all just get along without sharp weapons?
Gai-sensei, one of my blades accidentally found Neji's head.
Number 13: Kankuro
It's not a puppet! It's a doll, for God's sake!
Do I look like the Hamburger Burglar to you?
This outfit looks really hot on me.
Number 14: Temari
I hate this fan! I just want to rip into a million pieces, you know?
My hairstyle is falling out! Quick, I need some hairspray!
I got this outfit at a thrift store!
Number 15: Gaara
Temari, you're hot. Not like I'd hit on my own sister or anything, though.
Rock Lee. More like Yum-ee.
Sand just got into my underwear, and now it's really itchy!Gaara's Reaction…
Psh. I hate the people who write these. Seriously, stories are supposed to have some grain of truth. He thought to himself. Exiting out of the window, he stood up and walked out of the room, thinking negatively to himself.
Whoever wrote that sucks. I suck. The whole world sucks. Everything on this world and any other sucks, he continued thinking while he passed Temari.
"So," she said. "You really got itchy underpants?" with that, Kankuro burst out laughing from a room and she giggled. Rolling my eyes, I walked away from them.
Oddly enough, Sasuke and Naruto were outside. Naruto was reading a book which I recognized as – Much Ado About Nothing? – isn't that a Shakespeare…
Oh wait. Nevermind.
And Sasuke was humming a little tune.
Hm. Where have I heard that song before? Oh…
Pretty, oh so pretty, oh so pretty and witty and gay!
Yes, I did start to hum with him before I stopped myself. You know, it is kinda funny. Just a little bit. A teeny tiny bit.
Walking away from them, I smiled.
Thanks for reading, please review and tell me if it's funny, or if I should just throw my computer out now in shame.While you're at it, check out some of my other stories:)