AN: Mk, this is ma first story and I thought it should be a Yoruichi Soifon story since there's like only four pages of submissions and well let's just say Naruto gets a lot of attention. This is not gonna be a short lil' thing where they have sex and Soi won't be in the picture for a lil' bit, but bear with me. Oh and don't worry about Kisuke, I have a plan neh?

Disclaimer: Why do I even have one of these? It's obvious I don't own anything -cries-

Warning: I'm lazy so this could take a while

Rated: T for togas and raunchy language (sounds like a salad dressing), oh yeah and slight sexual themes

Chapter 1, The Preparations Begin

Her dark finger skimmed lightly over the plastic page, a small grin growing on her face as the photograph was hit by the sunlight, and it met her eyes with a glare. They were so young then, it was almost funny that she never even questioned their fate; it was an acceptance of her family's wishes that made her go along with it. Only, she often wondered what would have happened if the girl hadn't gone…


"What, Kisuke?" She raised her voice from the living room.

"I need your help with my newest invention." She sighed and put the photo album down on the table in front of her and worked her way towards the basement.

"What is it?" Her hands glided along the railing as she continued her graceful descent down the stairs, just stopping shy of the last two steps, and leaning over the short fencing. He turned around grinning deviously and set his hand on the human-like object behind him covered with a dirty off-white fabric. When was the last time he washed that thing anyway?

"Ok you remember my self cleaning toilet?"

"You mean the one that you got your head stuck in?" He rubbed the back of his scalp and laughed behind his scruffy hair.

"Yeah well this one is four times better!"

"Oh really?" An elegant eye brow cocked itself as she started smiling.

"Come on, Yoruichi, have a little faith in me," he pouted.

"All right fine, let's see it."

"Ok, now this is one of my best creations yet."

"Well considering the last one, I suppose that's a safe bet."

"Hush, now I present to you, the worlds first, electronic blow up doll!" And he ripped the sheet off tossing it to the floor, which is probably why it got so dirty in the first place.

"Kisuke you pervert!" She flew down the stairs after him, and he sprinted to the other side of the metal table the doll was resting on.

"Yoruichi, just calm down a second, I need your help remember?"

"I'm not helping you out with that disgusting toy."

"But, Yoruichi I need someone to test it out for me!"

"What?" She yelled and ran to the opposite side of the table, but he managed to get around it as well.

"Well how am I supposed to try it? Of course I'm gonna like it, it is my invention after all. And we both know you aren't the straightest line in the coordinate plane." A blush crept across her cheeks as she pounced on him over the table and pinned him to the ground. "Yoruichi, hold on a sec… I didn't mean ta-"

"Well now, I thought the weddin' wasn't for another month, honeymoon start already?" Kukaku strolled leisurely down the rest of the steps and crossed her arms in front of the two still on the floor. Both of whom instantly jumped up and blushed furiously before averting their eyes around the room. "What'd he do this time, Yoruichi?"

"Just look for yourself, he's created an abomination." She pointed towards the doll on the table, and the black haired woman looked it over and eyed him curiously.

"Is that what I think it is?"

"Well no… it's… yes?"

"You pervert," and she brought her fist down hard on his head leaving him to rub at it.

"Ow, what was that fer?"

"Yoruichi I dunno how you can go through with this, it must be killin' ya." The woman in question just chuckled.

"Well you know how it is, I've got no choice."

"Well now you say it like marrying me is such a bad thing!"

"Kisuke, you look like a bum."

"And ya smell like one too," Kukaku added.

"Well you would too if you worked down here all the time."

"Yeah, yeah, so anyway," Yoruichi turned her attention back to the Shiba woman, "Whatcha need Kukaku?"

"We need ta start making preparations for the wedding remember?" The purple haired woman groaned.

"My mom put you up to this didn't she?"

"Yeah, but that's not the point, we gotta get ya to a dress maker so ya can get sized."

"It's a month away! I don't wanna go now."

"Come on." Kukaku wrapped an arm around Yoruichi's neck and lead her up the stairs gesticulating about what it the gown should look like. Kisuke turned towards his neglected invention feeling the same and sighed.

"I didn't think it was such a bad idea," and instantly he picked it up, deflated it and shoved it in a box next to him which was labeled "Failed."

"Kukaku are we really gonna do this?" She turned to the girl next to her with a frown and looked back through the store window which displayed perfectly proportioned manikins wearing flowing ground length dresses with elaborate stitching and patterns etched into the front.


"What happens if I run away?"

"When I find ya I'm gonna kick yer ass."

"So… I guess we should go inside," and she turned to her right, but before she could take off down the side walk, her friend grabbed the collar around her neck. "Damn, why am I even friend's with you?"

"I love ya too, now inside." And she pushed Yoruichi into the door which opened with the ring of a bell.

"Good afternoon ladies, how can I help you?" A tall man walked out from behind a counter with raised hands gesturing towards them. His black bob cut hair rushed back and forth when he moved. It was a nice contrast to his odd right eyebrow and matching eye which appeared to have two long pink and yellow… what the hell is that? Yoruichi stared at the weird things as he introduced himself. "My name is Yumichika Ayasegawa." Kukaku held out her left arm to shake hands with the guy.

"Yo, this is Yoruichi, and I'm Kukaku, she needs to try out a wedding dress whatcha got that's good?" She stated while gesturing towards the woman next to her which appeared to be in a trance.

"Uhm, yes well I have a fine selection, if you had anything in mind I might be able to help."

"You have a book we could look at?"

"Sure, here you are." And he handed her a thick book that threatened to fall apart at the seams with how many pages were in it. She grunted as she held it and the black spiky haired woman dragged Yoruichi to a nearby table and pushed her into a chair.

"Now listen up Yoruichi, you gotta look through this. Pick out something ya like and we can…" She now looked the dark skinned woman in the face and noticed tears streaming down her cheek. "Oh, Yoruichi…"