Here's a piece of randomness that wouldn't leave my head. It's very strange and Bella's kinda out of character, but whatever. Hate it if you like. I think it's funny. Though that's probably because I'm on a sugar high. Anyway.
Disclaimer: The Twilight Universe Belongs to Stephenie Meyer.
This is going to be fun.
I understand that Jake needs sleep from all the extra running, but, jeez, how much sleep does a person need? Sleeping for twenty hours straight is just not normal. I don't care if it's the weekend. And he deserves it for falling asleep on me five times last week. I'm not that boring.
The door slams behind me and I give a mental curse.
Oh, crap. There goes fate, foiling my plans at every turn. I turn around to see—Billy. Oh. Maybe my plans aren't so foiled after all.
"Hey, Billy," I say, my face relaxing into a grin.
He raises an eyebrow. "Care to explain why you're sneaking into my house with a bucket of water?"
My expression turns sheepish. "Uh, not really?"
"Okay," he replies, rolling away, eyebrows still raised. He'll laugh when this is all done and over with. Oh, yes, he will laugh.
I tiptoe my way across the hall, trying not to trip and struggling a little with the bucket. Why does water have to be so heavy? I'm not exactly known for my upper body strength.
I carefully pry open the door to Jake's room with my toe, leaning myself against the wall so that I don't lose my balance. I give the bucket a heave upwards and some water sloshes out noisily. I glance up nervously at Jacob's sleeping form, but he's still snoring and didn't notice a thing. Good.
I creep slowly into his room and stand right in front of his bed, panting slightly from the effort of holding the bucket. It's really heavy.
I smile fiendishly and give myself a mental pat on the back. Teach him to fall asleep on me. I tip the bucket and—what?
As soon as the water hits Jacob's skin, it starts to steam. It evaporates on contact with a hissing sound.
Jake sits bolt upright, looking like a very groggy deer in headlights. I barely notice, I'm so busy stomping my foot.
"No, no, no, no, NO!" I shriek. "That's not how it was supposed to happen!"
I throw the bucket down and cross my arms over my chest. Jake looks at me with a bleary grin, unfazed by the freezing water I just threw on him.
"Something wrong, Bells?" he says. I just glare. Stupid werewolves and their stupid high body temperatures.
"Why," I grit my teeth, "did it evaporate? Why did it SIZZLE?!"
Jake just keeps grinning and I hear Billy's laughter in the background.
I wonder if he really would sizzle... ;)