Disclaimer: ABC owns everything and everyone.

A/N: SO. I haven't been updating most of my fics. I decided to just post this after typing it up… So this is MerDer, surprise, surprise!


"I want to marry you. I want to have kids with you. I want to build us a house. I want to settle down and grow old with you. I want to die when I'm 110 years old, in your arms. I don't want 48 uninterrupted hours. I want a lifetime."


He was going out on dates. The other night with Sydney and tonight with the scrub nurse named Rose, who according to Mark, Derek went through a lot of effort just to get her name. She, too, went through a lot of effort to find out more about who Rose was. Apparently, she's been in Seattle Grace for a long time now, a lot of times scrubbing in on Derek's surgeries. Probably to get close to him. Probably to see McDreamy in action. Or probably just to give Derek what he wants…

And she was afraid that maybe Rose would be the one to give him what he wants…


A house…

Settling down…

Growing old with…

Dying in her arms or whatever when he's 110…

A lifetime…

The things he wanted from her and yet she couldn't give…

But there was something that she could give him now…

She looked down at the piece of paper she's been constantly folding and unfolding for the past few minutes. She has finally settled on just staring at the blood test results in her hands.

Thoughts have been running through her mind all day. Their S & M relationship wasn't as bullet-proof as she thought it would be. They certainly did something wrong along the way that placed them, more specifically her, in this situation. It isn't easy to make a decision as life-altering as this. Especially when this could be the one thing that could keep him to her. The one thing that could maybe make her look less dark and twisty.

"What's up with you?" Cristina plopped down beside her.

"This," she slid the piece of paper across the table towards her friend.

"Fuck," Cristina's eyes went a little wide and her brow hiked an inch as she read the words written on the small piece of paper.

"And that," she pointed towards the far end of the bar where Derek and Rose sat.

"Who's that?" Cristina eyed the woman with Derek.



"Scrub nurse."

"Is she dying, too?"

"I don't think she needs to be dying to get the attention of anyone," she looked at the woman across Derek who was smiling while Derek did his McDreamy thing.

"Are they on a date?"

She shrugged. She heard from the other nurses that it was a date. They were all giggling when she passed by earlier that day and she swear she heard the words: Rose. Date. McDreamy. being mentioned.

"So are you going to tell him about this?" Cristina slid the paper back towards her.

"I don't know," she shrugged, taking the piece of paper and staring at it once again.

"You don't know? Do you want to keep it?"

"Did you know the moment you found out when you were, you know…"

"Yeah," Cristina nodded.

"So you really would have gone through with the procedure if you didn't…"

"Yeah," Cristina nodded once again.


Cristina paused, hesitated, and then shrugged. "Well, it's over and done now. Nothing else I can do about it. But you… You have got a lot of thinking to do."

She stared at her friend for a few seconds before letting out a sigh. There was a reason she was on the pill. There was a reason why she made sure a condom was present each time she slept with some one. There was a reason she made sure she didn't get pregnant by accident…

"Cristina?" she called her friend's attention.


"I've always been pro-life," she murmured.