Hajimemashite and Konnichiwa, dearest reader-san! Apple Fairy here! .
Well, here's a GuyLuke fic for you. Oog. I hope it's not as bad as I think it is. Dx
And…yes, I realize in my profile, I state that I dislike yaoi, but this is a shounen-ai story, really. Not yaoi.
Now that we've gotten that out of the way, I hope you enjoy the story. :3
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Tales of the Abyss.
Story by Apple Fairy
I don't get it.
This feeling, this strange beating in my chest…I don't understand why I feel this way around you.
Could you tell me why? Why I feel this way around such a caring person such as you?
Why I feel such warmth…
He felt so dreadfully terrible.
He felt as if his nose was on fire, having blown it too much. He had a nasty taste in his throat that forced him to cough what felt like all the air in his frail body. His jaw felt loose from having sneezed a great deal, a certain strain in his neck in addition. His joints ached from an unapparent cause and he had a headache that just refused to leave its new home. His head pounded and rang; the thunder outside not helping at all with his awful condition.
Luke had a cold.
He sneezed and glared at his window. The rain poured on it relentlessly, the soft whisper of it having grown to a loud, obnoxious patter in the last hour or however long it had been. The thunder rumbled off in the distance, louder than the rain's beat. He pulled his blanket around him tighter, feeling the cold of the rain seep in a bit, his night clothes offering no protection. Luke sighed and closed his eyes, but sleep ignored his begs and pleads to take him from this miserable feeling.
I hate this. This sucks so much. He whined, mentally. Van wasn't in Baticul today, and even if he was, training would've probably been cancelled by the storm.
But if he had come to visit Luke, maybe people would know he was so ill.
Luke regretted having a room separate from the mansion. He regretted those frequent days that he would never come out of his room that everyone had gotten used to. He hated that nature had decided to throw a violent rainstorm on his day to make matters worse, making him unable to look for help. He cursed himself for having shrugged off the slightly sick feeling he had yesterday. He should've told somebody.
Luke shrugged it off. It wasn't his fault he was sick. It was how this stupid mansion was built and how stupid nature decided to be a jerk that day.
It wasn't his fault at all. He was just the victim in this.
Luke sighed once again, and pulled the sheets over his head, coughing, feeling his chest shake with each one. He wished at least someone knew.
Then maybe I wouldn't have to endure this. What if it stays like this for days? What if no one finds me, and I die?! I don't want to die of a stupid cold! He complained once again, and sneezed.
Luke looked to the window once more. It reminded him of the days when Guy would sneak in to wake him up, or to just talk. To keep him company in this old, everyday place.
Luke frowned. Maybe Guy is going to come to see me again? He hoped, and then sighed at himself. What am I, an idiot? Guy's not crazy enough to come out in this rain. He quickly shot down his own idea, and closed his eyes again, forcing sleep to take him. It was all he could do in this situation, and he hated that.
He felt a pang in his heart at the thought of Guy being unable to come, but quickly shrugged it off as nothing. All he wanted was someone to take care of him.
Luke felt himself drift away from the pain, away from the disease he had. Sleep finally decided to take him. He felt it all slip away as he fell softly to whatever dream awaited him…
A series of bangs came from the window, and Luke was pulled out of his soon to be dream, abruptly.
He shot his eyes open and then widened them in shock, seeing who was there.
"You really are crazy!" He exclaimed in surprise to the person outside.
"Thanks. Man, it's pouring out there!"
Luke shook his head at his friend, locking the window to keep the rain away from his room.
"What the hell are you doing here anyway? Are you trying to get sick or something?" He scolded him, and sat back down on his bed, examining his friend and how the rain had matted his blond hair, how his shirt sagged with the added water. He looked soaked.
Guy smiled a shy smile and shrugged.
"I hadn't seen you today. I thought I'd check up on you." He explained as he removed his gloves, trying in vain to wipe his face of the raindrops with his semi-dry hands. The red-haired noble raised an eyebrow at him.
"Why? You know I only stay in my room some days…"
"Well, it's raining, and I thought you could use some company."
Luke began to say something in return, but sneezed once again, sniffling afterwards. Guy furrowed his eyebrows in worry.
"Are you okay, Luke? I mean, you're voice kind of sounds funny too…" He fretted. Luke frowned, and realized he was right about that last one. It was probably from all the snot clogged in his nose.
"I'm sick." He announced glumly and fell back onto his bed with a soft thump. Guy widened his eyes in slight shock.
"R-Really? Why haven't you told anyone?"
Luke pointed to his window, signaling it was because of the rain.
"Well, why didn't anyone notice?"
"No one came to visit."
Luke once again pointed to his window. Guy frowned and sighed.
"So no one knows you're sick?"
"Only you." Luke huffed in a sour tone. The fair-haired servant stared at his master for awhile.
"Maybe I should get someone…" He offered.
"You could take care of me." Luke shrugged. He felt himself wanting Guy to agree, wanting him to take care of him. He shrugged it off. It was probably because he was sick.
The room stayed silent for awhile, save the rain and thunder conducting its own orchestra outside. Luke began to feel uneasy. Was his demand too…awkward? It wasn't his fault…Guy wasn't supposed to take it seriously…
Said person nodded his head slowly.
"Well, if you insist."
Luke widened his eyes and sat up. "R-Really?!" He stuttered. Luke felt his heart pound with excitement, but shrugged it off as just wanting company. He felt the unease he had felt earlier slip away as well.
Guy nodded his head, some drops of rain sliding down his face faster. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and explained, "Yeah, I don't see why not. Besides, I'd feel bad if I made someone else go out in this rain."
Guy smiled at Luke, walked toward him, and brushed some strands of hair from his face. Luke felt his heart beat faster, and calmed himself before his face got the chance to turn as red as his hair. He tried to ignore it all, finding no excuse this time for how he was acting.
"So, what should I do first?" Guy asked lightly.
"Wh-What?" Luke stuttered dumbly, quickly scolding himself for overreacting so much. Guy frowned in puzzlement.
"Y'know, should I get you some medicine, maybe some food…what?" He clarified. Luke felt stupid for having not realized that, but shrugged it off.
It wasn't his fault; it was Guy's. He was the one who touched him so casually like that…
Luke recognized how awkward the excuse was, and decided it was his fault anyway.
"Luke? Do you want me to bring you some medicine?" Guy interrupted Luke's train of thought. He frowned at him.
"I'm hungry." Luke repeated, looked to the side, and crossed his arms. Guy nodded his head. "Alright."
"You want me to bring some porridge?" The fair-haired servant asked still looking at Luke. The red-haired noble felt uncomfortable for some reason, but shrugged it off, and refused to meet his gaze.
"Yeah. It's supposed to help the sick, right?" Luke ordered. Guy grinned at him.
"I'm surprised you know that. Didn't think you could be so smart." He teased. The red-haired noble turned his head to him, sending a glare to his servant.
"Shut up, and get me my food already!" He snapped. Guy laughed and bowed.
"Whatever you say, master." He shrugged, opened the door, and quickly ran into the rain, closing the door behind him.
Luke felt the room get a little bit colder, a little darker, when Guy left. When he had been there, the room felt…alive. More energetic, than the gloomy feeling it had when he had been alone. Luke found himself missing Guy already. He shrugged it off; it was probably just because he wanted someone to talk to, and they had left him.
He curled back into his sheets, and sneezed once again. He grabbed for his handkerchief on his desk, and blew his nose into it. His nose burned again.
Luke shivered, and brought his blanket nearer to him. His heart felt empty. He felt…lonely.
Stupid cold; it's got me feeling so miserable and awful. He whined, and closed his eyes.
But, when Guy had been there, he didn't feel like that. Guy made him forget about his sickness.
He made things…warm.
He didn't make it cold, like when Luke felt lonely or depressed. He didn't make it too hot, like when Luke got impatient or angry.
He made it warm, when Luke felt cheerful and proud.
And Luke liked that. He liked feeling 'warm'. He liked that special moment of warmth, when his heart cheered up a little, or when his stomach did that weird, but soft, flippy thing. He loved feeling 'warm'; it felt nice.
And, for some reason, he only felt it around Guy.
He felt it when Guy would wake him up, or when he came to keep Luke company in this isolated and routine place. He treated Luke like a person, not some sort of special delicate animal that always had to be watched and protected. Sure, Master Van did the same thing, but Guy…well; Guy seemed to do it better.
At least, that's what Luke thought.
He shook his head, his eyes still closed. I don't get it. Why can only Guy do that? Is it because he's my friend? He wondered. The feeling of Guy's cold hand, slightly touching Luke's cheeks came to mind. Luke let himself blush; that made him feel 'warm' too.
He didn't think that was why. That the reason he made him 'warm' was because he was his friend.
I mean, Master Van is my friend, but he doesn't make me feel that way. He frowned in confusion. Then, why? Why did he feel so happy around his friend and servant? Why did his small touch make him blush? Why did he want him to stay with him?
Is it…love? Luke asked himself, and then felt his stomach flutter madly. He opened his eyes, and shook his head slowly.
No! Guy's a friend and…a guy. I can't be in love with him. I…am I? He refused and looked ahead in worry. He glared at nothing in particular, just out of frustration. "No, I'm not. I just want someone to be with me…'cause I'm sick." He told himself, and coughed once again. Luke brought the blanket over his head, and curled up tighter, bringing his knees to his chest. His room still felt so cold…He wiggled his toes to circulate some warmth into them, but it didn't help. The thunder rumbled louder outside, but he didn't care to notice.
I'm not in love with him. He's a friend. That's all. He told himself over and over. However, his heart seemed to protest, as it beat faster and faster with the thought of him and his gentle words and his casual smiles. It seemed to say over and over "I'm in love with him, I'm in love with him."
Luke continued to glare in front of him. This is so stupid! He's just a friend, and that's all! Why the hell am I worrying about it so much? This makes me so mad! He thought angrily and sat up, ready to scream in frustration.
Until, of course the door opened, and closed just as quickly.
Luke jumped a bit in shock, and Guy stood there once again, a tray covered with a napkin in his hands. His hair seemed to be wetter now, sticking to his head, his clothes making him shiver. He didn't care to notice though, and smiled at Luke.
"Sorry I took so long. I hope I didn't get anything wet." He sighed and walked over to him. Luke watched him with interested eyes as he put the tray down on his desk. He found himself worrying about his friend. He looked so cold, all wet from the rain water. Why didn't he tell him? He wished he could help…
Wait, why do I care? He asked himself. He wasn't in love with Guy; He just wasn't.
"Medicine, or food first?" Guy asked as he removed the napkin, steam rising immediately from the bowl of porridge. Luke felt his mouth water at the sight of it, soon forgetting Guy's condition, caring for himself instead. He was so cold and famished…
"I'm hungry now."
"Alright. Here." Guy handed Luke the bowl. It felt warm. He immediately set to feeding himself.
"Now, be careful." Guy warned, "its still a bit-"
"…hot." He sighed. Luke quickly swallowed the porridge and fanned his tongue. It went down bad, scorching his throat on the way.
"You have to blow on it first, that's why. Don't be so impatient." He scolded him, and grabbed the spoon from Luke.
"Like this." He demonstrated, took a spoonful of porridge, brought it close to his lips and blew on it. Luke watched him with fascinated eyes. He watched as he pursed his lips together, and closed his eyes a little. Luke wondered how soft those lips were…
He felt his cheeks heat madly, and quickly shooed the thought away. A friend, he was only a friend.
Were friends allowed to hold back the urge to knock that spoon right out of their friend's hand and kiss them right there?
Guy looked up to him, soon breaking Luke's train of thought and guilty pleasure fantasy. "Now, say 'ah'." He ordered. Luke did so, and Guy put the spoon in his mouth; He obliged and closed. Luke took in the taste. It was warm, and comfy in a way. He liked it.
Guy pulled the spoon out and smiled. "See? Much better if you have patience."
"But I was really hungry…" His master grumbled after he had swallowed it. He felt his stomach warm in a way. It was kind of like drinking hot chocolate in winter.
Guy held back a sigh at how his friend acted, but decided not to say anything. "Here. You can feed yourself, can't you?" He asked playfully and handed him the bowl. Luke shook his head.
"…Y-You feed me." He ordered, and looked to the side. Guy frowned in disapproval.
"My joints hurt. You do it." He huffed. The fair-haired servant looked at him for awhile. Luke felt nervous at his stare, and he tried his best to keep the blush away.
"Fine. Say 'ah'." He obliged, and ordered him as he blew on another spoonful. Luke felt his heart lift in excitement. He sort of liked the idea of Guy feeding him. It reminded him of those days when he was a kid, and Guy watched over him.
It was…a comfy sort of feeling. It was a feeling that he was safe and loved. It was a feeling that made him curl his toes, a feeling that made his spine tingle. He loved that sort of feeling.
And Guy was the only one that made him feel that way.
And he hated that, because that could mean he loved Guy, but he didn't, because Guy was a friend and a boy, just like him.
At least, that's what he told himself.
"Hm?" He looked up from the spoonful of porridge he was cooling.
"Aren't you cold?"
Guy looked at him, confused. "What do you mean?"
"I mean, you went out in that storm twice; any normal human being would be shivering like mad." He explained sarcastically. Guy shrugged, ignoring Luke's rude attitude as he continued to feed his master.
"I don't mind. It's not that bad, really."
"You're so weird sometimes. You could at least take off your vest or something. You'll get a cold if you don't."
Guy sighed and looked at Luke for awhile. Said person immediately looked away from his gaze. He was beginning to grow nervous at Guy's stares.
"If I take it off, will you stop pestering me about it?"
Luke turned his head fully away, feeling his cheeks heat and his heart beat madly. He didn't know why he was getting excited at that sentence, and most of him didn't want to know.
"Maybe." He pouted, trying to grip onto some lasting dignity. He didn't hear Guy's response, but only a shuffling of clothing. He forced himself to look at Guy as he pulled off the orange vest, and placed it on the edge of his bed. He smiled a lazy smile at him.
"Mm." Luke responded subtly, his head nodding slightly. His servant looked at him worried. "You sound tired, Luke. Must be terrible to be sick…"
"Would you feed me already? Geez, do your job." Luke teased and motioned to the porridge. Guy obliged silently and the process continued for awhile, the air comfortable, not awkward as most would think.
"By the way…" Luke piped up. Guy looked to him, confused. "Hm? What?"
"I know that porridge helps sick people. I'm not that sheltered." Luke huffed. Guy rolled his eyes.
"Luke, just a week ago, you were surprised that vanilla was a plant."
"Well I thought it was just a flavor of ice-cream!" He explained. Guy laughed. Luke punched his arm playfully.
"Don't laugh; I can't get out of this place, so how would I know?"
"Have you been studying like I asked you to?"
"It's depressing." He frowned, and crossed his arms across his chest, his green eyes looking to the side. "All I read about is places I'll never be able to go to, and people I'll never meet, and it just sucks."
Luke hated this place. He felt caged and locked up, and there was no way to escape it.
Guy stayed silent for awhile, and Luke glanced to him. He looked to be deep in thought.
Well, at least he's not staring at me this time. The red haired noble thought relieved, a bit of irritance in his tone. He didn't like it when Guy stared at him. It was like he was looking into his thoughts sometimes, and that made him worry if he could see the thoughts he had about him.
Luke noticed his imagination had gotten out of hand being cooped up in the manor. He really hated this place sometimes.
"…Maybe when you're able to get out of this place, I'll show you around, yeah?" He asked and held up the spoon for his master, cutting into Luke's thoughts. The red-haired noble stared at Guy for awhile, with amazed eyes; ignoring the food he was offered
"R-Really? You'd do that?"
"Yeah. It'd be fun. Like a sort of trip. Maybe before you get married to Princess Natalia." Guy explained and Luke took the porridge at last. Afterwards, he smiled, shooing away the thought of having to marry Natalia, and thinking only of seeing the outside world with Guy. It sounded exciting.
"You mean it, right? Promise?"
Guy smiled one of those casual smiles Luke had grown to love. "I promise."
He flinched at his coughs. He didn't like his friend being sick; it worried him.
"Here. Take some medicine." He ordered when he had stopped. Luke sniffled and nodded, taking the pills and water from his servant. He put the pills and a bit of water into his mouth, and threw back his head as he swallowed the medicine. It tasted bitter. Luke handed the water back to Guy.
"I hate this cold. Makes me feel awful." He whined. Guy placed the water on his side table, next to the empty porridge bowl.
"Don't worry; the medicine should cure it. Get yourself some sleep." He instructed, and moved toward the door.
Guy looked back to Luke. The red-haired noble cursed himself mentally. He didn't mean to react like that! It just came out so suddenly…
"What? What is it, Luke?" His friend asked with concern, as the thunder rumbled outside. Luke was at a loss for words. He wanted Guy to stay. To stay with him.
"I'm…I'm not tired." He lied.
"You need the rest."
"Then sleep with me."
Silence erupted and Guy looked at him with widened eyes. Luke blushed madly, and looked to the side; he hoped his face wasn't as red as he felt it was.
"I-I mean to like…lay with me and…stuff…" He mumbled. He felt his heart beat rapidly with anxiety.
Why did I even say that?! Dammit, I'm so stupid! He scolded himself, longing to take back the words that lay between them, making everything uneasy and awkward. He knew he was crossing the line of 'friends only'.
"L-Luke…you can sleep fine by yourself…" Guy excused as he looked to the side. Was Luke just seeing things or was Guy blushing? He shrugged it off; it didn't matter now.
"The thunder scares me. Stay with me." He ordered stubbornly. Luke realized there was no turning back now, and thought he might as well go at it full force.
And maybe, yeah, as wrong as it was, he was probably in love with his best friend.
Guy frowned at him, a feeling of butterflies in his stomach. He wasn't afraid of the thunder; He knew that. Luke just wanted an excuse to for him to stay with him. To…sleep next to him.
He was crossing the 'friends only' line and didn't even care to look back.
No, Guy corrected himself, he's full on sprinting across it.
So, what now? he asked himself. He could've left that room then. Could've rejected Luke's feelings. After all, they couldn't be. He was only a servant, and Luke was already engaged to someone else. Not to mention the only reason he joined the Fabre household…
But for some reason, even if Luke was a different rank, and he was the son of the man he hated, Guy didn't care about any of that.
"…F-fine. Scoot over." He agreed hurriedly and walked back to the bed. Luke blushed once again, and looked at him with a puzzled face.
"R-Really?" He asked, as he moved over, giving him room, Guy sitting on the side of his bed, removing his boots.
"Yeah. Y-You want me to stay, right?" He explained, embarrassed. Guy quickly plopped onto the bed, and turned to Luke, his face red as well. Luke stared at him. Oh man…he was in love with his best friend. His best friend that was a guy.
He fell back onto the bed, and Guy put the sheets over himself as well. The two stared at each other, faces red, hearts beating fast. It was an awkward moment, because they both knew they had already left the 'Friends only' line miles behind them.
Luke looked to the side, to the ceiling, anywhere but him. "H-Hold me. It's cold." He ordered. He felt his eyes on him. Had he gone too far? Was he hinting too much? Luke longed to take back these words too.
But I want him to hold me. I love him. He explained to himself, finding nothing he was doing as wrong.
Guy wrapped his arms around Luke immediately, and closed him to his chest. "Like this?" He whispered into his hair.
"Y-Yeah." He nodded, embarrassed. Guy smelled like water, and felt damp. Luke didn't mind. He didn't care, because Guy was holding him, his arms were around him, like he was protecting him.
And he got that feeling again. That feeling that he was safe, and that he was loved. That feeling that made him curl his toes and close his eyes, and made the pit of his stomach and soul feel all fiery. That feeling that made him smile and made those tingles go up and down his spine.
That feeling of warmth that he only got around Guy.
Without thinking or even caring about the consequences, Luke wrapped his arms around Guy, holding him tightly. He felt his legs go weak and his heart beat faster, and his face heat madly. He could hear Guy's soft breathing and he could feel his chest rise and fall.
He loved it. All of it.
Yeah, he knew it was wrong, for him to love his friend, his friend that was a boy, but at that moment and in that feeling of warmth, he didn't give a damn. He was with him, and Luke wouldn't let anyone else take it or him away. It was his feelings, his friend, and he refused to share or give them up.
Call him selfish or in love, it really didn't matter, because in a way, they were one in the same.
No response. Luke decided he had probably fallen asleep or something. It didn't really matter if he had. He just wanted to get these words out anyway.
"…I know it's bad…but I think I'm in love with you. And I don't care if it's bad, 'cause you're mine, and I love you." He admitted and closed his eyes from the view of Guy's chest and the window, the rain playing a soft hum, making the moment that much more warm and pleasant. Luke smiled at his confession, and let the soft rhythm and the feeling of warmth deliver him to sleep.
Guy opened his eyes and stayed silent at his friend's confession.
I love you.
The same words he wanted to say.
"…You're warm, Luke." He whispered, and closed his eyes once more.
That's the end of it! Thank you for reading! :3
Wow…this got more fluffy then intended. And Luke is really OOC. I am so bad at this sort of stuff. Dx
This was sort-of inspired by the song 'Bubbly' by Colbie Caillat. So I suppose that is something worth mentioning…
Ah, yes, I revised some stuff and added a bit. Um...it got more cheesy, didn't it? xD;;;
Anyway, that's all I have to say. Thank you once more for reading, and have a great and wonderful day! Ciao! x3